A Filipina Mom Blogger

Read more about my son’s death at the Maribago Bluewater Beach Resort blog entry.

Anniversary dates often stare out from the calendar. The birthday and death anniversary in the calendar are the most prominent and so hard to acknowledge. The birthday , July 13, 1993 that brought so much joy seem but a fond and sometimes painfully wistful day of a “what might have been” memory. Then the lousiest day of the year, May 27,2000 that is etched on a stone at the Loyola Memorial Park, the day a lot of our sweetness left us forever. It was a brillant , sunny saturday afternoon just before Luijoe died and it turned to dark gloomy rainy weather as we brought Luijoe’s body to the morgue. It’ll be 6 years without my Luijoe .

There is more to the story on the events of my son’s death. It’s not written in the “Fallen Cradle” book or in Luijoe’s website.

In time, you will all know.

I believe my son left us enough signs to ponder. There were 3 signs on this sixth year. Let me leave out the first sign for now which showed up on October 7, 2005. The second and third signs revealed itself during media interview this year.

May 27, 2000- Luijoe to the left and his sister at the beach front of Maribago Bluewaters Resort

1. Joy Rojas mentioned Maribago Bluewaters Resort in her Sunday Inquirer Magazine interview last January 8, 2006 I remember telling her ” let’s skip the name of the beach resort“. You know for the past 6 years, even enunciating the words MARIBAGO BLUEWATERS BEACH RESORT gives me the chill. I didn’t divulge the name to her. Yet , she was resourceful enough and found out about it.

2. Ali Sotto read our Inquirer article after she interviewed me for ALI Mother day feature last May 12. On my way out of the restaurant , she called me back and uttered in disbelief “So it was Maribago Bluewaters Resort“. I didn’t know she was reading the Inquirer article. Ali said “I just read it“. In her mind as she interviewed me she envisioned Maribago Bluewaters. She has been to all the beach resorts in Mactan but it was Maribago Bluewaters that got stuck in her mind.

I believe my son whispered to them somehow. As to the meaning to all of this, God will let us know in his OWN time.

Meanwhile, as May 27 approaches, tears are quick to come.The hurt never goes away. We never forget. We never get over it. We hurt so much because we loved so much. But the focus on Luijoe’s death and the event fades, and the warmth of good memories replaces it during the rest of the year.

A grief journey is like a dance where we take two steps forward one-step back, one-step forward two steps back. Perhaps in actuality the dance never ends. Nor does the journey. It is our lifelong affliction. When the music stops we find ourselves back on the reality dance floor without our Luijoe. So on May 27, 2006 we will remember. We will try to get through the best that we can on the lousiest day of the year.

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