A Filipina Mom Blogger

teaching sex education is not only limited to getting pregnant and about being a parent. it also involves the danger of numerous diseases out there. STD’s, and AIDS. a lot of factors(feelings, responsibility, maturity, health, etc..) go with sex. aboloshing sex education in schools is not an option.

hi Noemi

Sex education is an extremely complex issue. I certainly agree with you when you say that many young adults can not understand WHY when they are simply told to have sex only when they get married. And the old “God will punish you if you have sex” method simply doesn’t work anymore. Nor do I think that it makes much sense. Kids need to be made aware that sex, just like so many other things has its consequences. There is unwanted pregnancy, as you’ve mentioned. There is also the issue of Sexually Transmitted Diseases. In both cases, teaching them how to use a condom is simply not enough (many STDs can be transferred through skin or oral contact). It is not actually just kids, but everyone that needs to be educated. And that is what will provide protection that is far better than what any condom or contraceptive can offer.

@dexie: yes the STD’s are definitely part of sex education. I am just so mad that the church is trying to influence the sex education

@allergyboy: true they have to be aware of the consequences. Parents and the rest have to be educated as well. It’s not limited to high school students.

So true, while we are not influenced much by ‘morality’ as defined by the church, sex is still a big issue especially for us who have daughters. I have three, two of them in their teens. They are bombarded by sexual messages from all sides of their life, and parents have to take an even bigger role now to provide them with balance. I want my girls to see their sexuality in a healthier light than I did, without all the misconceptions and guilt that came with it. It’s hard finding a balance between wanting them to be able to enjoy their sexuality without being ashamed of it, but also accept and be accountable to the responsibility that comes with it.

It should not be left to the parents alone. Take me for instance. I am fairly well-educated in the sense that i have two degrees in my belt, but i didn’t have a clue about the process of concepcion until my late twenties, when i took an active interest in that subject after i discovered that i had an infertility problem.

How much more for people, particularly in the rural areas, who barely finished elementary? And we’re only talking about the physical process here! How about the moral, psychological, spiritual issues? and the consequences like diseases and pregnancy? I am certain that most people barely got even the smallest briefing on these subjects! How can anybody expect them to teach these to their children when they themselves barely know a thing?

Even my own friends, themselves mothers, practically have no inkling on topics such as ovulation, etc.

Believe me, based on my own experience, except for doctors, only women having difficulty conceiving make the effort of understanding the process that goes on within their bodies! Most just take it for granted, that it just happens.. part of being alive, just like breathing.

As for the deeper issues, I took lessons when i was younger where i could get them.. sad to say, I got my values about purity, evils of unwanted pregnancy, etc. from comics and novels like barbara cartland and mills and boons:(

Especially in the Philippines, most parents are uncomfortable talking about sex with their children. A lot of them don’t know anything about the reproductive system. It should not be removed from the education system. I think it should be boosted to make it include all aspects… scientific, emotional, psychological, etc..

Noemi, the way you talked with your kids was so cute.

@JMom- Media is a great influence on our teens that’s why morality issue won’t work. We let them know that sexual feelings are normal part of their growth but that acting on it is another thing. That’s why we need to keep our teens busy with healthy activities i.e. sports, arts, etc

@Olga- See sex education should also encompass the parents. We didn’t have adequate sex education ourselves. The Catholic church has no business opposing sex education and worse, the government scrapping it.

@Toe- True. When I started talking about sex education to my girls, my husband was so uncomfortable. The education was not one conversation . My girl siblings and in-laws participated with this discussion in a light setting so that it didn’t appear we were teaching them.

I have no opposition to sex education in schools. Actually, my kids’ school ask parents to sign an approval sheet if they want their children to participate in this. Because there are also parents here (just a few) who might not want this. I know my sister is one. We have very different views on this subject. So when it’s time for the sex education topic, her kids are left out, either sent to another room or the library. I have strong opinions about that but she is very religious and always sticks to what the Roman Catholic Church says. I don’t know if she talks to them about sex because she won’t even let them movies where there are just the slight touch of kissing. I think there’s nothing wrong with children seeing kissing on the movies, we just have to explain to them what’s happening and later on when they are older have the sex talk with them. I know she wants to protect her children from all these “worldly” things but they live and move around it, so I think they should be educated.

@niceheart: My husband used to tell the girls (in their early teens) to “close their eyes” whenever there is a kissing scene. I would tell him to stop doing that and then I explain to the girls why they were kissing. You are right we have to explain to them whenever these scenes appear in the movies. To protect our kids from worldly things is natural for parents but we can’t be there 24/7 to see if they are watching or reading the right things.

SEx Education is merely an outlet for those who want to get sex in their early age…

Brief Background: I’m 18 years old very well educated about birth control, sex, STD’s, pregnancy everything. Lived in the Philippines for 17 years and migrated here in the US.

I completely understand how everybody here feels. As an only child and only daughter,my parents raised me in a very conservative environment where everything linked to sex is a taboo. My mom wouldn’t even let me see a kissing scene even at 15! The catholic church couldn’t just expect parents to teach their kids about sex because some parents just would not. Many of them try to avoid it. My parents didn’t even mention anything about it to me. Nothing.. They were just so lucky that I’m a really responsible person that I didn’t experiment during my very early teens years because if I did, I probably would have ended getting pregnant. I oppose to the Catholic church’s decision of banning Sex Ed at school because this is very important. A lot of them argue that Sex Ed will only lead to increased sexual activity, but I completely oppose. Even if we didn’t mention this things to them, sex is all over the place. In the internet, tv, movies, games, peers, everywhere. How wouldn’t some of them try it especially during the years of hormone surge. I believe that even if parents wouldn’t want them to have sex before marriage, some of them will still do. why can’t we just make them educated about it? so they can make more intelligent decisions. Through this, they will be more aware of the real consequences and know the real facts.

@Kristie- thank you for your point of view. You said it yourself. Some parents can’t do the job. Sex is such a taboo topic.

Excuse me ma’am, but you can’t TURN INTO A LESBIAN or kids don’t “turn” to lesbian relationships to fulfill emotional needs, studies shown that being gay or lesbian is a non-changing attribute since birth, and cannot be changed, nor can it be “induced” nor can people be “converted” into a homosexual, they either are homosexual or not, period. Please educate yourself as well on that, thank you very much. God Bless.

@RIC- excuse me RIC but read the entry carefully. I was not talking about looking down on lesbian relationships. I was talking about the school’s blind eye treatment.

Hi! By saying that the school turns a blind eye, you’re implying that the school should punish the girls involved in same-sex relationships, unless you just worded the sentence incorrectly.

@ric- perhaps you do not understand this particular ultra conservative Catholic school I am illustrating. Not all Catholic schools are like this though.

They don’t turn a blind eye on girl-girl relationship but raise hell on girl-boy relationships. Equal treatment should have been their rule if they were for the morality issue. It’s an observation I noted and NOT my own conclusion.

sex education is nothing

sex education should not be taught to elementary students these days.. as every generation gets smarter the tend to become curious! and it will lead to something bad!

I’m a filipina. and now lives in germany.
im 16.
well, my boyfriend don’t have a problem if we don’t do sex. BUT!
he said… sex is part of love.
well, my father is not against it.he just said.. if we want to do it, i must first ask him and mom to go see a doctor for pills
and i also must make sure my boyfriend use condom for safety from diseases.
sex is part of love, but i do really think one should do it once she or he is already ready. it doesn’t mean to really after marriage.

i am for sex after marriage. because according to philippine law. when the mate is anable to fulfill your sex thrills or can’t make you happy, one can file a case of annulment.
so better sex before marriage to have someone to compare than to make the mistake and that will cost more.

I’m making a thesis right now about sex education and i agree that sex education should be taught at school. Screw what the catholic church says. Though it’s true that sex education should start at home and be left for the parents to handle but this is just not possible for everybody. Some parents do not fully understand the whole concept of what sex is, physically, psychologically, emotionally, everything, some do not have the time, some are too conservative to talk to their children about sex and this will only leave their children clueless. Sex should be explained to teenagers, about its consequences and the responsibility involved. It is better for teenagers to have their sex education at school than from their peers.

its very hard for a child to understand those things but i believe that having it taught properly may ease those you know….some child thought that sex is just a childish game but they are wrong sex is very complex so they need a proper guidance from older or even be open to their parents….and besides its the most appropriate solution that i can think.. and let’s just remind our kids to be aware of those things especially its very important.its better if they knew those things so they might well know what will happen if they made those things…….so parents pls.be more open to your child so you can guide them at the right path…..

Hi Noemi,
Reading this post, I learn the good way to educate children about sex. Many parents avoid to talk about sex with their children. I do not agree with this because children will search from external source if they do not get from their parent…They might get wrong information from outside.

I am a bit confused, it sounds to me that the government will be replacing the current program with a new one. i personally don,t think it is the governments responsibility to provide sexual education unless it is demanded by the majority of the governed, and if it is it should then only be optional. the real problem i have with the sex education in my country ,U.S.A. , is the fact that what my kids will be learning is subjected to the usually politically motivated biased opinion of the educator and state on what is moral in regards to sexual activity. at best public sexual education only needs to teach children the reality of S.T.D.s and that abstinence is the only way to ensure their prevention and the prevention of unwanted pregnancy. the homosexual agenda in this country is to normalize homosexual activity as a naturally occurring genetic trait that is part of human nature. this has been widely excepted by many people who know very little about genetics, as can be shown by an earlier post from RIC…

“Excuse me ma’am, but you can’t TURN INTO A LESBIAN or kids don’t “turn” to lesbian relationships to fulfill emotional needs, studies shown that being gay or lesbian is a non-changing attribute since birth, and cannot be changed, nor can it be “induced” nor can people be “converted” into a homosexual, they either are homosexual or not, period. Please educate yourself as well on that, thank you very much. God Bless.”

ironically RIC is the one who needs to educate her self and i will leave a link with articles and citations from the studies in question.
http://www.narth.com/docs/istheregene.html
http://www.narth.com/docs/fading.html
but it is because of this type of miss information that i would not allow my 3 daughters to attend our sex ed program here in the states.
another is the fact that most of the material given in these classes are provided by planed parenthood and is nothing more than a promotion for contraceptives. now lets face it your lucky enough to get your teens to be responsible with things like home work and chores do you really think they will be more responsible and dependable when it comes to sex and contraceptives. i am 26 …my wife is 25….we use the BILLINGS method of NATURAL FAMILY PLANING….this is not the rithom method and is just as effective as any contraceptive on the market to day…..just like the rithom method was at its time….google search the billings method for tons of info. my first daughter was conceived while my wife was useing the pill and my third daughter was conceived while useing spermicide …so go figure..
and on another note i would like to address such comments as…

Noemi :”I am just so mad that the church is trying to influence the sex education”

and

The Catholic church has no business opposing sex education and worse, the government scrapping it.

i would say to the contrary that the church has the right to oppose or influence any thing it wants to just like Noemi has the right to do so as well. i would allso say that is it is the verry business of the church to teach in matters of human natur and it’s origen …this is a subject that theoligy and phylosophy are the determining factors in every culture, and sex is part of human nature and its oregen. and further more the government can fund or not fund how it sees fit and as a citazen of any country we are all subjected to either majority rule or might. dont blame the church ….after all the pope isnt the one making the laws, its your government…and if government is influenced by the faith of its leaders this is still not a direct action of the church.

perhaps adult education is the best way to teach the children…..after all most of us are led by example ….and if the adults can take resposibility for there actions and the education of there own children perhaps the governments responsibility can be minamallized and more freedom will be alloted to the families through knowledge and incentives to gain this knowledge.

I am a college student and we are having debate about the topic.
and my group got the against side of having sex education on high student in the Philippines.. The good thing is, I, personally against the sex education on high school because youth nowadays are very experimental in all things, they want to try everything so when you teach them the sex education without proper explaining and careful approach they will get curious so they will start to ask themselves and if didn’t got the answer from other people or if they did not satisfy with those answers they will search the answer on their own and try to do it..

sex education is a remedy for the main problem of our country(overpopulation). But sad to say, our church banned it because of the belief that our young people(especially the secondary students) still have a bud mind to this matter in which contrary to the reality.

on my view, sex education should now be taught in high school,
specifically for 1st and 2nd year.

and for the policy to be effective, it should be included in curriculum.
this shall exclude the issue on morality and religion.

the teaching personnel for this subject should not just be a teacher but a professional. (psychologist, social worker, and the likes)

the numerous incidents of teenage pregnancy and abortion is very alarming.

-we will be having debate on this matter that is why im researching.

ARE YOU SURE THAT IT IS THE LACK OF SEX EDUCATION THAT IS TO BE BLAME?IN MY POINT OF YOU IT IS THE MEDIA WHO IS TO BE BLAME. BECAUSE THE MEDIA EXPLOITS SEX IN A VERY PLEASURABLE MANNER. THAT EVERYONE WHO WATCHES IT WILL BE CURIOUS.

hi. also leaving a comment to see if anyone bites, and as preparation for an upcoming debate… i actually think i know gie up there. i even think she’s my partner in this debate. =_=

anyway, going on topic…

i have considered a few points and personally decided that sex education (in school), in itself, is ineffective AND parental guidance (sex ed through parents), again in itself, in equally ineffective. obviously, what i am trying to say here is that sex education should encompass both the students/children and their parents. this answers two of the core problems sex education faces:

1. everyone is curious. as gie said, very few can control that curiosity. and school is not the place to let it sit. in fact, school is the worst place for curiosity. with peer pressure and barkadas and all.

2. again as mentioned in earlier comments, parents _need_ to participate. there is no denying the fact that parents are an essential key to the understanding process. however, some parents themselves did not experience correct and effective sex education, such that they find themselves in the same side of the boat as their children.

just for the sake of argument, a good example of implementing this proposition is for the children together with their parents attend seminars/workshops/lectures on sex education. we can say that both children and parents learn. parents, who are expected to be more mature (having experienced sex, and its consequences) on the topic, can guide their children on the spot and immediately give them the appropriate follow up information to support the knowledge given by the teachers. we can therefore assume that the children can be controlled and protected from possible misguidance from peers and friends at school. in fact, given that such events be held in school, these peers can be part of the whole learning process and simulate a better environment and motivation to discuss the issue in a serious way, even on their own.

and so this is my stand: sex education must encompass not only students, but their parents as well.

having sex education is good if taught to highschools for they have a more stablished mind than to the lower levels,however, teaching sex education in schools would be an avenue for students to try it since they have contraceptives to prevent pregnancy. Let us face it, even if teachers would say that they are teaching these that we may be enlightened, what they don’t knw is that they are just giving the students clues on what to do to prevent pregnancy. It further gives students ideas on what to do and how to do it.

i’m a highschool student, from the phils. too, my principal ask me to do this poll about having sex education… I really don’t know anything about it, but i’ve read your reactions and based on it…

AGREE because…
more of us will be aware of it, and considering more consequences that’ll happen after having sex.

DISAGREE because…
more students would be curious of having sex education…
and they would probably try it using contraceptives…

I do not agree that sex education is taught to elementary students in the form of science or bio only. It should be taught at an early age together with proper teachings of a values, morality and spirituality. Emphasize on them the dangers of having premarital sex and tackle the latest issues that should be clarified.

but parents like you should not only blame it to the education given onto us youth. Exploiters of sex are those to be blamed. and whoever implanted the idea of a liberated world. which only result to people acting like animals looking for sexual relief.

Due to the advancements in technology, parents can’t ban their children from sex and porn the only thing you can do is to educate them at an early age and explain to the the importance of sex and when not to have it.

Hi! I am having a term paper about sex education. I havent started it yet but my thesis statement goes like this “dissemination about sex information should come from proper authorities.”

I’m 17, a devout catholic and a 2nd year nursing college student and from the Philippines. Even though i’m not into sexual activities, i believe that sex education should be taught. Am not only reffering to sex ed thru schools but also in our very own home.

The problem in our country is sex is a taboo. That is why parents are having a hard time talking ’bout sex to their kids. Some finds it weird and uncomfortable. Some parents even prays that their child wont even ask such a question. Parents should bare in mind that it is primarily their responsibility to educate their kids for parents are the role models of their kids in the first place. Especially the mothers because they are the “guiding light”. They should not be afraid to talk about sex with us because the world today is liberated. Every corner is filled with evil. How can they be so sure that we are safe? How can parents be sure that their little angels are angels still? The media bombards our thoughts about sex. Books, magazines and even peers are their to openly discuss the matter about sex. So I think that it is better and i really mean BETTER if parents should start being open minded. They should discuss about sex in a professional way with their kids when they are still young because young minds are not dirty minded. So if they are already knowledgeble about sex when they are young, they can be prim and proper when discussing about sex when they grow up for they are introduced to sex in a different way than those kids who learned and heard ’bout sex in a vulgar and uncultured way.

If the parents are not that educated about sex then they should educate theirselves first. How can they teach us and give us proper education regarding sex issues if they themselves dont know a thing. So it is better that they read books first or in any way educate theirselves first so that when they educate us good and true information will be taught. Their are tons of books on the library or bookstore that talks about sex. The internet is even a good source. They should know the anatomical view of the reproductve system, family planning and all stuffs related to sex ed. With all these sources they can now talk and educate us about sex for they themselves know what sex really is for they experienced it and they know the dangers and exact consequences of sex. In short, parents can be considered as one of the “proper authorities”.

As a devout christian, i think that the church has the right to interfere regarding sex ed in our country. But i must say that the church should be open minded and not just be one-sided. Yes, having sex is immoral for sex is a sacred thing done by married couple. But we cant deny the fact that the world today is not the same as the world yesterday. Nothing is permanent but change itself. The views of the parents and the kids are different and i must say that this is normal for everything changes from one moment to the next. The way our parents was raised and their generation is so way different from us. But it doesnt mean that if parents&kids have different views they are not bound to understand each other. Anyway back to the church thingy, i think that instead of always giving bad comments to the action of the government, the church can have a program regarding values education and character formation in schools to neutralize the sex ed goin on in the schools. Values should be taught to primary level pupils and sex ed can start during the sevondary level. But i dont think that the church and the government can be considered as one of the “proper authorities” because the church only does it because of their belief and the government can only be promoting sex ed because they can profit more.

blahblah..

hmmmm… i still have lots goin on in my mind. I think i’ll post again some other time. tc evry1.,

I’m cess, 17 years old and a 2nd year engineering student from the Philippines… I’m currently taking up a subject that is all about term paper and my topic is all about the sex education in the Philippines…

…I know that the religious people would really disagree for the implementation of sex eduction curricula because mainly it affects morality… but the problem is they failed to realized what is the main caused of moral degradation in our country… Mores is really different from folkways as sociology is concerned… I believe that sex education should be taught to the students (starting 5th grade or high school). Because students spend a lot of time in school rather than in home. Our parents are so busy enough to earn for a living and they only have a little time for their kids, especially that we are now in “Industrial Society” as what Gerard Lenski’s analysis in the evolution of societies, where the family is not anymore the focus. Also, if we keep on insisting that sex education should be taught at home, it would not be so effective, from the fact that the term “sex” is a taboo… our parents will just say its bad and we will know if we will be old enough to face all those things… and there is no further explanation… so apparently we will be so confused about it… our curiosity will lead us to do so.. but if we make it as part of the school’s curriculum nothing may seem to be bad.. As educated student we may be able to know what shoud we do and what we shoud not. What makes us avoid danger in the streets??? because we are taught how to read the signs… And what happens to the people who are not educated, they will surely have accidents in the street for they don’t know what’s the meaning of the signs in the street., if they have just learned all those things in school, they will surely avoid accidents. Just like having sex education if it will be taught to the students, students will not anymore be ignorant about it.. and for that they will know what will happened to them if they do so.. But if the students will do something bad about having “pre-marital sex” that is not the responsible of the school anymore because their goal is to EDUCATE students about sex for them not to be ignorant… that responsibility relies on their parents on how they discipline their kids.. And also depends on the student… Remember that God has given us a free will… and even if we will not implement sex education curriculum in our school, “pre-marital sex” will still exists… But having sex education will lesser the statistics of the pre-marital sex in our country…
And I am sure of this, based on the research studies of some countries…

It’s not the sex education that leads the young to commit “pre-marital sex” it’s the ignorance, the discipline from parents, and the “FREE-WILL that God has given to us.” But impementing sex education will open the youth’s eyes from the reality…
—hope the church will be able to realize what must be realized…
until then i finished my term paper with regard to this… I’ll post again…

thank you…

God Bless every one!!!:)
-cess’08

sex education is a expressed feelings to others. it can identify your physical, emotional,and mental.all human beings have a sexual identity.it can attract toward and activity.sexuality is multi-dimentional phenomenon that includes feeling,attitudes and values .it is the part of our living life..sex is the important in our life because it can produce. sex is bad for the other but this is not true .

oh yeah.. interesting topic.. during our 2nd year level, we have our term paper and our topic was about sex educ as well.. oppss mind you, i dug a little deeper with this topic.. waaaaaa… in relation to psychology as well..

webslaves last blog post..The conclusion of MBM 2008 and the Cebu Blog Contest

I really admire women especially mothers who can openly discuss sex education to their children. Parents should at least try to explain this issue to their children before they started learning about it from friends or unwanted sources. I agree with you that we really need to educate our young people and obviously a lot of them are not for abstinence. I think the Government should create a comprehensive sex education that will include all aspects (spiritual, emotional etc.) of human development.

actually i’m a third year college in the Philippines and our debate concerns about sex education, well we are assign to the cons side of sex education shall teach in high school and elementary based on what i read most of you are agree about it and can you help me to prove that sex education doesn’t contribute in making the people to become responsible for their family but instead it hinder and make people curious doing it. for those who are against sex education please help me to prove my claim… thanks,,

..hi i am a college student
i agree with the statement of Adam..
it is very well said there and
clearly stated the disadvantages of
sex edUcation.

sex education should not be tought to
those high school student
since it would just treger to ramphant
pre marital sex

I agree with Dexie! Telling our daughters the risks of having sex before marriage, free sex and / or sex without the sense of responsibility. One of the worst problems that a woman can have pertaining to sex especially irresponsible sex is bacterial vaginosis and this is what I’ve been telling my daughter! Not only that, I always communicate with her and I keep telling her about God and all the angels in heaven above, you know what I mean so she can be guided accordingly.

hi noemi my name is abigael dela cruz from zamboanga city a 4th year graduating student and im currently making my thesis entitled “permissiveness on premarital sex among college students” basically what my research is all about is the perception of college students on premarital sex and which one is more permissable when it comes to premarital sex male or female students? and i also wanted to know their level of awareness when it comes to the consequneces of premarital sex.are they aware of the long term consequences of engaging in premarital sex like unwanted pregnancy or worst catching aids,std or hiv.if you have related topics or websites that i can visit dont hesitate to inform me it would be a big help for my paper.
thank you and more power to your website godbless!
sincerely,
abigael dela cruz
zamboanga city