A Mother’s Dream

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I grew up in a family surrounded by music. Every morning, mom played her Bach or Chopin concert pieces to our delight. We often danced like awkward ballerinas or sat beside her, mesmerized by the melody of her piano pieces. Naturally, she wanted us to learn the piano. With 7 siblings taking up piano, organ and guitar lessons, our parents imposed nightly concerts after dinner. We actually had fun showing off our pieces. As we entered college, our passion for music diminished. Only a brother and a sister continued to hone their musical talent.

Then I got married and had 2 girls and a boy. In 1989, my dad surprised me with a piano . “It’s my Christmas gift to your girls. They should be playing the piano.”

I was so touched by his generosity. My father at that time was disabled and unable to work but he had significant savings to tide him over. He mumbled “One of your girls might have your mom’s music genes”. I remembered that my sister, B started piano lessons at the age of 4. Maybe L, my four year old daughter might be interested to study the piano.

I was amazed at L’s chubby fingers as she nimbly played complicated piano pieces at the age 4. Maybe she will be a concert pianist one day, the stage mother in me mused. She continued playing the piano and cultivating her other artistic talents during her growing up years. Then on her sixteenth year, she asked for an electric guitar.

My husband coughed ” I imagine you wearing a beautiful gown sitting on a stool while you play the cello

My daughter laughed “That will not happen dad. I want to be a “rock star”“.

My concert pianist wants to be a rock star. I grimaced. Pooof, she’s not going to be a concert pianist after all. As a mother , it’s natural to have dreams for our children but I would never impose my own unfulfilled dreams on them. I decided I’d be supportive.

I remembered that Butch’ family had a 1960 red vintage Eko guitar stashed away somewhere that belonged to his grandmother. She bought it from a garage sale of an American leaving the Philippines and used it to attract crowds during her husband’s campaign for Congressman in the sixties. With a few repairs from a Raon st. shop, the guitar sprang back to “life” as L strummed the night away in her sound-proofed bedroom.

eko guitarL continued with her guitar till her college freshman year. I thought maybe it was just a phase for her. For the past 3 years, this beautiful red guitar served as a conversation piece beside the piano in our living room along with 2 acoustic guitars. Last night she surprised me with the latest news tidbit : my friends and I formed a grunge-rock-punk girls band . Oh dear, with those horrible arrows in her ear, an eyebrow ring, together with the new rock band, that image is completely different from what I envisioned my sweet looking daughter to be. But that is the kind of music she wants to play. Though it may not be Bach , Chopin or Handel , it’s still music. Playing music is an emotional outlet and she’s happy with it. A mother’s special dream for her children is to see them happy with their chosen path. Her path may not be what “all the girls do”.

Wherever my girls go in life, whatever they choose to do, I know they will accomplish greatness. I also know that if ever they are in doubt about anything, they can trust their intuition, and go with their best judgement , because they know themselves. I know they are not worried if they make a mistake or change direction from time to time, since they still have many more “learning” years ahead of them. They know that if they ever need help or advice, I will always be here for them in any way that I can be. Although their faith in God is a bit shattered right now, I constantly remind them to pray even if praying is hard to do.

Wherever they may go in life, my love goes with them.

Noemi Lardizabal-Dado (1352 Posts)

You may contact Noemi (noemidado @ gmail.com) for speaking and consultancy services in the following areas: Parenting in the Digital Age (includes pro-active parenting on cyber-bullying and bullying) ; Social Business ; Reinventing One’s Life; and social media engagement. Our parenting workshop is called "Prep to Prime (P2P): Parenting in the Digital Age (An Un­Workshop)" P2P Un­Workshops are conducted by two golden women in their prime, Noemi and Jane, who have a century’s worth of experience between them. They are both accomplished professionals who chose to become homemakers. This 180­degree turn also put them on a different life course which includes blogging, social media engagement and citizen advocacy. They call their un­workshops Prep to Prime or P2P, for short, to emphasize the breadth of their parenting experience. They tackle different aspects and issues of parenting ­­ from managing pregnancies, prepping for the school years of children, dealing with househelp, managing the household budget, to maximizing one’s prime life and staying healthy through the senior years.


About Noemi Lardizabal-Dado

You may contact Noemi (noemidado @ gmail.com) for speaking and consultancy services in the following areas: Parenting in the Digital Age (includes pro-active parenting on cyber-bullying and bullying) ; Social Business ; Reinventing One’s Life; and social media engagement. Our parenting workshop is called "Prep to Prime (P2P): Parenting in the Digital Age (An Un­Workshop)" P2P Un­Workshops are conducted by two golden women in their prime, Noemi and Jane, who have a century’s worth of experience between them. They are both accomplished professionals who chose to become homemakers. This 180­degree turn also put them on a different life course which includes blogging, social media engagement and citizen advocacy. They call their un­workshops Prep to Prime or P2P, for short, to emphasize the breadth of their parenting experience. They tackle different aspects and issues of parenting ­­ from managing pregnancies, prepping for the school years of children, dealing with househelp, managing the household budget, to maximizing one’s prime life and staying healthy through the senior years.

  • my husband plays guitar very well so i’m hoping my kids will get interested in playing too. actually my son has shown interest so we’re gonna get him his own guitar this Christmas :). the baby girl listened to her dad jam when she was still in my tummy so i won’t be surprised if she becomes a “rock star” too. 🙂

    so what’s your daughter’s rock band’s name? i’ve been visiting her site and i smile thinking about you when i read about her new piercings..:).

  • @dexie- most likely your kids will want to play the guitar too. Once you surround the with music, it’s a normal part of their life. L said their all girls band hasn’t decided on a name . Oh yeah that piercing, I was horrified. She promised to have a neat looking “arrow” once it’s healed.

  • hi! as a mom, you rock for giving your daughters the freedom and space to explore and find themselves. and you also express yourself beautifully. i was at the blogcon, but we didn’t get to meet. i’ll make sure to introduce myself next time. 🙂

  • my son is also into rock music… it started early when he was in high school. and now, he works as a web designer on weekdays and lead guitarist on weekends. well, i don’t know if i should consider the latter a job, because most of the time, his band (blazing bulalakaws) plays for free..or sometimes very minimal pay .. lol! i wanted him to pursue law, as he has a political-pyschology degree. kasi i also wanted to be a lawyer… haha! funny that we want our kids to fulfill our unfulfilled dreams. but you’re right.. it’s their life, so let them be where they are happy. we can only support, guide and cheer for them in the background.