He evoked in me a capacity for love I did not know I had. Those feelings did not die with him, nor will they, I pray, die with me.- Gordon Livingston

A tribute to Luijoe’s 10th angel year (May 27, 2000 – May 27, 2010)

Parents who have lost a child speak of the “zero point”. Our lives are divided into the time before and the time after our children died. No event – no graduation, no marriage, no other death – so defines us. At one moment I was one person, then, suddenly, I was someone else. The task we face is to create with our new selves something that, in some measure redeems our suffering.

We see, always with longing, children who remind us of what our child was or would be now. (Gordon Livingston)

Did you know…the universal symbol of
remembering is a candle?
Did you know…letting go of the deceased, but
honoring his/her memory with a symbol is a
ritual that brings healing? Sometimes words are
not there to express what we want to say, but a
symbol that brings meaning to you can help in
the grief process.

——————————-
You might also want to read Positive Mental Energy and Affirmations and my other blogs like Free Filipino Food Recipes, Shopping Finds, Pinoy Food Photo Blog and Techie Gadgets.

How about visiting my daughter’s ukay-ukay blog at ukaymanila.com?

Hope you can drop by! Thanks for visiting…Noemi Lardizabal-Dado.

Add me in Facebook by introducing yourself. My facebook is at facebook.com/noemidado

Thanks To Our Sponsor: Cheap Pinoy Blog Hosting Plans for 950 pesos a year including top level domain name

I often wonder how he would look like today. The young man as he often called himself even at 6 years old, is supposed to be an incoming college freshman, the last of my children to be in school.

Would he have been taller than my husband? Would he have the same gleaming smile? Will he still throw me kisses and give me a bunch of flowers with an “I love you” note? Would he still be cracking jokes? I can’t imagine because I will always remember him as an innocent and beautiful 6 year old boy whose death caused my world to spin around and around. I still miss him dearly but the pain is not heart wrenching anymore. I don’t feel like I am drowning in pain. I yearn for him especially during birth and death anniversaries or when I see a boy similar to his age.

Like this very moment, I think of Luijoe. Tomorrow is his 10th angel year.

My new normal as a blogger served me well: my role as a bereaved mother is no longer the first way I define who I am, but it is ever-present in my life and cannot be separated from all that I am . . . for the rest of my life.

I am happy with the work I am doing now. I cannot imagine myself today as I am, active in the new media arena, in online advocacies and meeting new friends and reuniting with old friends. I never dreamt I had the courage to embark on advocacy projects. Not to mention playing a role in the online coverage of the May 2010 elections.

I am not a writer.

I learned to write creatively for this blog and still learning. I promoted my grief recovery blog not knowing that this was the start of my NEW NORMAL. Readers who have lost family members, jobs, siblings, children write to me thanking me for my story. They see hope in their own sad stories.

Aside from grief recovery, I embarked into a Filipina online campaign and lately a citizen’s journalism site or elections 2010. From a homemaker , I am now thrust to a whole new world of new media and as features editor of an alternative online magazine, the Philippine Online Chronicles. Never did I conceive that the shy old me would land on TV, newspaper, radio, magazine as a resource person for grief, then later in blogging then social media for the elections. Blogging brought me new friends, reconnected with old friendships, brought me to travel places. It taught me to be more confident.

I realized that Luijoe’s death gave me courage even if it took me five years to realize it. Courage to let life go on, to give myself a chance that new and good things will happen to me that will add JOY to my life. I felt he wanted me to carry on the comfort to others. By working with The Compassionate Friends, I would act like a “St. John” to other bereaved parents. He was struck with St. John as he comforted Mary, the mother of Jesus as he lay dying on the cross. Truly, God works in mysterious ways and He uses our children to help us find and shape our ministries. It is our children who remind us of the bigger work that God has set out for us in this world.

Working with “The Compassionate Friends” is also my way of keeping Luijoe’s memory alive in the next couple of years. I also know that every time I comfort a bereaved parent or sibling, my actions are a living tribute to my child.

I believe there are no coincidences in life. There is a special reason things happen the way they do. My new friends and associates cross my path for a purpose. It is not a coincidence that the publisher wanted to work on an ebook of this blog. They have no idea that I have long wanted an ebook but just didn’t know how. It is no accident that I promised to send the manuscript by tomorrow not even thinking it was Luijoe’s 10th angel year at that time.

Tears linger as I think of my son’s 10th angel year tomorrow. As I wipe a tear , I smile at the thought that Luijoe has always been beside me in every step and action I take to make a difference in this world.

Life is good. I am right where I need to be, having the time of my life, loving work and my husband and children. I am blessed to be touched by an angel.

How about visiting my daughter’s ukay-ukay blog at ukaymanila.com?

Hope you can drop by! Thanks for visiting…Noemi Lardizabal-Dado.

Add me in Facebook by introducing yourself. My facebook is at facebook.com/noemidado

Thanks To Our Sponsor: Cheap Pinoy Blog Hosting Plans for 950 pesos a year including top level domain name

I feel ambivalent towards Erap.

I neither like nor dislike him. My feelings has something to do with the memories of my little boy. My 6 year old son adored Erap. Luijoe thought the world of the former president. Luijoe yelled at the top of his voice that Erap was the smartest president in the whole world, in a jumpacked room at a plane ticket office ten summers ago.

In his booming voice, he threw his hands up in the air , twirling around the room, “Mom, President Erap is so smart, the smartest president in the whole wide world”.

awkward silence

Nobody in that room could deny not hearing my son’s adulation. It was May 2000 at the height of Erap’s unpopularity. I wanted the floor to open up and swallow both of us. I could feel the steely gaze and snickers surrounding us. My boy never sensed the awkwardness of the situation but I wanted to save face.

“So , why is Erap the smartest president in the whole wide world?”, as I squeaked the question to my naughty son.

“Mom, his jokes mom. He says the funniest jokes. That is very smart of him” (or something like that)

See my son had a great sense of humor and loved to throw a joke or two. Then he discovered the Erap jokes during one of our conversations. Luijoe overheard us laughing to our heart’s content on an Erap joke. He wanted to know why were laughing. He badgered to know the joke. So I narrated the joke

Erap: Miss, do you have a ballpen?
Clerk: Sorry, sir we don’t have any ballpen
Erap (angry): Why did you name your store “Penshoppe“?

How my boy laughed! Luijoe loved to tell this joke to everyone . One time, Luijoe and I passed by Penshoppe ( a teen fashion store) in Glorietta mall and I teased him if he wanted to go inside with me , so I could ask the same question Erap asked. Luijoe tugged me away. hehe

I bought him the book , “Joke ni Erap” by the Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism in early 2000. Luijoe often packed this Erap Joke book in his backpack and kept re-reading those jokes that he could understand. He loved the book so much, he even labelled it with his name. Here are a few of his favorite jokes culled from that book.

Erap: “I have brain cancer. Yehey!!!”
Ramos: “That’s delicate, how come you’re still happy?”
Erap: “Now I know I have a brain”

Comelec: Oh, simple math na lang! Ano ang “2 + 2″?

Erap: Three!
Comelec: Sorry
Ronnie: Mataas pa diyan!
Erap: (in his highest-pitched voice) Threeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!

and Luijoe’s favorite of all.

Executive Secretary Zamora: Sir, Pwede bang palitan ‘tong laptop ko?

Erap: Bakit?
Zamora: Masyadong Mabigat, eh!
Erap: Ba’t di ka mag-delete ng files para gumaan?

Like most young kids, Luijoe was already computer savvy and he knew about deleting files. How he loved to crack this joke whenever I carried my laptop.

I smile and tear as I recall these poignant Erap memories with my son.

What an innocent little boy.

In Luijoe’s last week in this temporary place, we call Earth, my impish little boy caught Erap on TV and tugged my sleeve to take a look.

“Mom look at Erap. What does corruption mean?”

I pondered. How should one explain corruption to a six year old boy?Should I break my son’s heart and explain that he is accused of amassing wealth?

I decided not to lecture him on the evils of government. Corruption is an alien concept for such a little boy. I cuddled my son and just told him that he had problems. My son died a few days later. It was best after all that I did not tell him .

The days and the weeks soon after our devastating loss, seem like a blur, making me a living zombie. Not even the news of the EDSA 2 moved me. I was numb, even apathetic to the political climate.

Here I am 10 years later, watching the news, hearing about Erap, the second leading presidential candidate. The memory jolts me as if I never left the year 2000, as if I am right there with my son. The skeptics might think it is odd that I want to thank Erap for the memories. Even discounting my son’s death, it is undeniable that the former president still has charm even to the masses.

Perhaps, I don’t know what to do with Erap as a presidential candidate except thank him for being himself , the charming person that he is.

In a few days, on May 27, it will be 10 years since my son died.

Memories like these make it seem my son never left me, that he is alive and well and just laughing nearby.

——————————-
You might also want to read Positive Mental Energy and Affirmations and my other blogs like Free Filipino Food Recipes, Shopping Finds, Pinoy Food Photo Blog and Techie Gadgets.

How about visiting my daughter’s ukay-ukay blog at ukaymanila.com?

Hope you can drop by! Thanks for visiting…Noemi Lardizabal-Dado.

Add me in Facebook by introducing yourself. My facebook is at facebook.com/noemidado

Thanks To Our Sponsor: Cheap Pinoy Blog Hosting Plans for 950 pesos a year including top level domain name

Image taken from Luijoe’s prayer book

I can easily relate to one of the last words of a dying Christ.

Who has not, at some dark hour, cried out to the heavens in anguish and pain and wondered if indeed we have been cursed and abandoned by God ?

The image of a dying Jesus Christ , a sorrowful Mother Mary and a comforting John never fails to bring me tears as poignant memories of my son drift into my mind. I wrote this story when I first started this blog 4 years ago and I think it is worth sharing again.

Being a “cafeteria Catholic” my religious faith was at best mediocre. Luijoe, my innocent and religious 6 year old son often chastised me for not praying hard enough . I felt like a terrible mother who led a ho-hum religious existence. Gosh, we learn so much from our children , don’t we? It is Good Friday , one of my treasured memories that remind me of my son. The image of the dying Jesus when he blurted out ” “Woman, behold thy son… Behold thy mother” struck a chord in my son’s heart.

Luijoe was struck at the image above and I thought all the while he was saddened at the dying Jesus.

Every night, Luijoe pointed to that image asking me over and over again what it meant. He pointed to John the Beloved “Who is he? How is he related to the Mother of Jesus?” Strange he asked about John and not the dying Jesus, I pondered. I cuddled Luijoe in my arms and explained that the dying Jesus wanted John the Beloved to take care of his grieving mother.

How was I to know that my own son would die the following weeks? During the funeral, I recalled those last words and took it literally to mean that my family or my friends would take care of me in my bereavement, that there would be “John the Beloved” who will help me.

When a death as devastating as the loss of a child hits you, one tries to find meaning. One tries to make sense out of it. The time came when I realized that those last words were not about me. It was about me helping those who are in pain , because the grief journey is not easy. My son made sure that I would not be alone in this journey as long as I continue to help others through the grief support advocacy of The Compassionate Friends. He made sure I remembered to be the “John the Beloved” and be compassionate to other people’s pain.

He who was nailed to the cross, wanted to spare His mother further pain—- not only for that moment, but for her entire future. He put her in the care of the apostle whom “He loved” and whom He knew would care for her in return. Even as Jesus was dying, He went beyond himself to addresses someone else’s need.

One of the last words of a dying Christ remind me of my son who died so young yet I know he continues to live in me through my work, my actions and devotion.

Luijoe is with me everyday.
——————————-
You might also want to read Positive Mental Energy and Affirmations and my other blogs like Free Filipino Food Recipes, Shopping Finds, Pinoy Food Photo Blog and Techie Gadgets.

How about visiting my daughter’s ukay-ukay blog at ukaymanila.com?

Hope you can drop by! Thanks for visiting…Noemi Lardizabal-Dado.

Add me in Facebook by introducing yourself. My facebook is at facebook.com/noemidado

Thanks To Our Sponsor: Cheap Pinoy Blog Hosting Plans for 950 pesos a year including top level domain name

“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” George Bernard Shaw

I do not recognize myself from the person I was in the past. I am more confident. I appreciate myself more. I have a new life, helping bereaved parents through the Compassionate friends , blogging and new media publishing. I am having the time of my life and feeling beautiful, loved and being loving.

I was a full time mother from 1987 till 2005 where I stayed home most of the time. Though I am proud to be a mom, I knew I was more than just a mother. I felt wanting to do more when the kids went to college. There was this inner desire to provide public service like my father did.

In losing my son, I was meant to bring out my service oriented nature to other bereaved parents and the nation. It brought my dormant talents of organizing and initiating service oriented projects (filipinaimages.com, blogwatch.ph, compassionatefriends.info, Philippine Blog Awards)

I did not find myself. I had to go beyond my comfort zone, innovating myself, doing things that were not the old me.

Writing is not one of my talents. I had to learn to write creatively for the blog. I promoted my grief recovery blog not knowing that this was the start of my NEW NORMAL. I am now in new media and using this to bring awareness to my causes. Aside from grief recovery, I embarked into a Filipina online campaign, a citizen’s journalism site for voters education , and just recently I was hired as a features editor for Philippine Online Chronicles. Me, an editor? From a homemaker , I am now thrust to a whole new world of media. Never in my wildest dream did I imagine I would be on TV, newspaper, radio, magazine as a resource person for grief, then later in blogging. Blogging gave me new friends, reconnected with old friendships, brought me to travel places. It taught me to be more confident.

I am happier. My son’s life ended too soon but I had to experience this pain and learn to go out of my comfort zone and reach out to others.

It took me a long time to realize that grief is inevitable and that misery is optional.

What does do good is doing good. I decided to lead the second part of my life differently and better than I would have imagined …in the name of my son, Luijoe. I know that as I reach out to bereaved parents through The Compassionate Friends … the world is changed in some small way for the better, and then the actions taken become my living tribute to my son. And then Luijoe is never entirely gone.

Life is good.

Photo Credit- Janette Toral ——————————-
You might also want to read Positive Mental Energy and Affirmations and my other blogs like Free Filipino Food Recipes, Shopping Finds, Pinoy Food Photo Blog and Techie Gadgets.

How about visiting my daughter’s ukay-ukay blog at ukaymanila.com?

Hope you can drop by! Thanks for visiting…Noemi Lardizabal-Dado.

Add me in Facebook by introducing yourself. My facebook is at facebook.com/noemidado

Thanks To Our Sponsor: Cheap Pinoy Blog Hosting Plans for 950 pesos a year including top level domain name

I’ve been there. I’ve been judged. I understand the anger of @Miltary_Mom when people started to judge her when she tweeted on the drowning of her two-year old son Bryson Ross in the swimming pool of their home in Merritt Island, Fla.

Shellie Ross otherwise known as @Miltary_Mom and who blogs at blog4mom.com tweeted the following:

5:22 p.m. – a breezy update about the fog rolling in and spooking the chickens as she worked in her chicken coop.

16 minutes later, , a 911 call was placed from her home saying that Bryson was lying at the bottom of the pool.

6:12 p.m. “Please pray like never before, my 2 yr old fell in the pool.”

5 hours later, she wrote in tweeter “remembering my million dollar baby” then posted photos of the little boy. (Some of these tweets and photos have since been removed.)

Not long after that, a firestorm erupted on Twitter, with strangers wondering what kind of mother tweets during a crisis. The debate has been going on for days around the Internet, with critics calling Ross callous (and suggesting that if she had been paying as much attention to her child as she had to her Twitter account, her son would not have come to harm) and supporters (many who know her in real life, and others who have never met her) describing her as a caring mother who reached out to her virtual community during a tragedy.

A local paper quoted Madison McGraw saying that “If she didn’t want questions raised at such a painful time, perhaps she shouldn’t have tweeted immediately after her child died. A child is dead because (of) his mother’s infatuation with Twitter.”

In Madison’s blog, she points out that “Between the hours of 8:37 a.m. and 5:22 p.m (her first and last before son was found drowned in pool) she tweeted 74 times. ”

Social media specialists said criticism of Ross is unfair, noting that she’s simply tech-savvy and using a familiar way to communicate. They added that it’s inappropriate to question her actions at such a horrible time in her life.

How dare these people judge Shellie! Were they there when the accident happened? Is this the right time to make insensitive remarks? Shame on those who yelled out cruel words. Can they even comprehend the depth of Shellie’s grief? When death comes without warning, the shock and disbelief can be overwhelming. Shellie turned to twitter to seek comfort from her community.

My heart goes out to Shellie. While my son was dying at the emergency room, I was too much in shock to talk to anyone but my sister called another sister asking for prayers from other relatives. If posting on Twitter comforted her and made her feel connected and allowed her to ask for prayers for Bryson, then that is her process. She could have been in shock so great that the only way she could balance it was to do what she normally did…twitter. Everyone grieves differently and I would never criticize her for reaching out to her community. There’s no “right or wrong” way to grieve and nobody should judge, especially if they were not there.

Madison goes on to say

“I’ve seen people react [to a death], but they’re screaming their heads off, crying and they don’t know what to do,” she said. “They’re not on Twitter. I’ve never seen that before and I was just shocked.”

Clearly Madison has no idea on the grieving process. The situation is just so surreal. I never screamed or yelled or cried when my son died. It was only days after.

I don’t see the point in punishing her more after this tragic loss. For a parent, there is nothing more devastating than the death of our child. Let her grieve in peace.

If you want to question the death of her child, there is no good in putting blame on the mother. There are lessons learned from the incident but blaming the bereaved mother is not going to help.

When the unthinkable and the unspeakable happens like the death of a child, that is not the time to be judgmental, and especially, not to be mean or nasty about it.

Think: Is this is the appropriate time or place to be chastising anyone? Where is the compassion here?——————————-
You might also want to read Positive Mental Energy and Affirmations and my other blogs like Free Filipino Food Recipes, Shopping Finds, Pinoy Food Photo Blog and Techie Gadgets.

How about visiting my daughter’s ukay-ukay blog at ukaymanila.com?

Hope you can drop by! Thanks for visiting…Noemi Lardizabal-Dado.

Add me in Facebook by introducing yourself. My facebook is at facebook.com/noemidado

Thanks To Our Sponsor: Cheap Pinoy Blog Hosting Plans for 950 pesos a year including top level domain name

On the second Sunday of December, parents worldwide join together and light candles for their dead children.

For 12 years, parents gathered on the second Sunday in December in homes, churches, parks and gyms. Sunday night, families all around the world lighted candles at 7 p.m. in remembrance of their beloved children. It has been 4 years for the Compassionate Friends Philippines.

“You wish you could be naive again, go back to your life the way it was,” said Kristy Mueller, who organized the South Bay candle-lighting ceremony in Palos Verdes Estates in the USA.

“But you can’t,” she said. “You don’t get over it. . . . And this is a hard time of the year. When you can’t help but think about what you’re missing.”

For many of bereaved parents, this is a difficult month. Holiday traditions bring families together, but they also spotlight grief and amplify loss.

The company of other parents is part of what made Sunday’s candle-lighting so special.

A fellow parent wrote this poignant poem in Tagalog.

Sa Bawat Hakbang
by Vilma Dee

Sisinghap singhap ako’y nagsikap
Upang sa kalaliman ng dagat ako’y umahon
Tila ba sabik sa salubong mong yakap
Tulad ng hamog sa sariwang dahon

Unti-unti mula sa kawalang hanggan
Lagusan ng kamalayan aking narating
Tila ba sabik sa salubong mong yakap
Tulad ng maog sa sariwang dahon

Ano’t nasilaw sa bagong mundo
Sa dating payapa ngayo’y magulo
Tila ba lahat sabik ako’y masdan
Tulad sa hamog ng sariwang dahon

Di malimot unang haplos na iyon
Maipadamang pagmamahal tanging layon
Tula ba lahat sabik ako’y masdan
Tulad ng hamog sa sariwang dahon

Sa unang hakbang kamay mo’y kaagapay
Lahat ng gawin nais mo tayo’y sabay
Tula ba sabik na ako sa iyo’y matulad
Tulad ng paruparo mula sa kanlungan

Kay ganda din pala buhay sa lupa
Nguni’t di singganda ng tahanan ng MANGHUHULMA
Tila ba nagising sa mahabang paghimlay
Tulad ng paruoparo mula sa kanlungan

Sa piling mo nadama ko kaibang pagsinta
Nguni’t di singtulad ng pagibig ng MANLILIKHA
Tila ba nagising sa mahabang paghimlay
Tulad ng paruparo mula sa kanlungan

Iglap lang pala tayo’y magkakasama
Salamat AMA sa maikling magsasadula
Tila ba napagod sa pagsamantalang laya
Ngayo’y bumalik sa IYO puno ng sigla

AKING AMA, ako’y narito na
Dala ang masayang kwento sa lupa
Mula sa pansamantalang laya
ANAK mong ito’y muli kang bibigyang saya

A short video of our beloved children

——————————-
You might also want to read Positive Mental Energy and Affirmations and my other blogs like Free Filipino Food Recipes, Shopping Finds, Pinoy Food Photo Blog and Techie Gadgets.

How about visiting my daughter’s ukay-ukay blog at ukaymanila.com?

Hope you can drop by! Thanks for visiting…Noemi Lardizabal-Dado.

Add me in Facebook by introducing yourself. My facebook is at facebook.com/noemidado

Thanks To Our Sponsor: Cheap Pinoy Blog Hosting Plans for 950 pesos a year including top level domain name

“We can’t call him an animal because I have pets and they are tame. No, he is a monster. They are monsters” Mangudadatu on Ampatuan Jr. and his gunmen.

Photo Credits to Reuter
View Slideshow of Other Photos

Pat Dayrit a Twitter Follower gasps: Oh my god. The politics of this country is appalling.

A facebook friend posts at her wall: Mangudadatu told reporters, referring to Ampatuan Jr. and his gunmen. “My wife’s private parts were slashed four times, after which they fired a bullet into it,” he added. “They speared both of her eyes, shot both her breasts, cut off her feet, fired into her mouth. I could not begin to describe the manner by which they treated her.”

I condemn this brutality. I feel so much for the families who lost their loved ones in the Maguindanao massacre. I weep as I see the mutilated bodies in photos . How do they even begin to comprehend the immensity of their loss? Such unfamiliar territory . There are no words to express my utter disbelief that this could happen in a democracy.

Continue reading my commentary on the Maguindanao Massacre at blogwatch.ph
——————————-
You might also want to read Positive Mental Energy and Affirmations and my other blogs like Free Filipino Food Recipes, Shopping Finds, Pinoy Food Photo Blog and Techie Gadgets.

How about visiting my daughter’s ukay-ukay blog at ukaymanila.com?

Hope you can drop by! Thanks for visiting…Noemi Lardizabal-Dado.

Add me in Facebook by introducing yourself. My facebook is at facebook.com/noemidado

Thanks To Our Sponsor: Cheap Pinoy Blog Hosting Plans for 950 pesos a year including top level domain name

(Berthram (Nonoy) Tan, Best Friends Forever UP Cebu 74-78 died on September 27 due to Myocardial Infarction. He came to Cebu and pretended to invite Robert, fellow classmate to dinner at Laguna Garden. Unknowingly,he was part of the game plan of Robert’s children to give a special surprise silver anniversary party. They had grand time that night and parted ways wee hours of the morning.

This is my eulogy which I read last night during the necrological services.

Dear family, relatives and friends and Best Friends Forever,

I am not a stranger to death. I lost my mother, father, my two brothers and most painful of all my beloved son. 5 deaths in the family.
Still, the loss of a friend hits me hard. Even if my house in Manila is
undergoing a clean up operation due to Ondoy flood damage, I knew I
just had to come here to Cebu and pay my last respect to a friend.

I only met Nonoy in 2006 when Joan invited me for his birthday
celebration. I was like ” who is nonoy tan?”. But see, we shared
mutual friends from our group, Best Friends Forever . I had no idea who he was. Meeting him for the first time, we hit it off right away. It helped that he knew my dad .We could relate to stories of our common classmates and both had health issues with our heart.

Three years of friendship is not much but we didn’t have to meet every
day to connect with each other. Facebook, the social network bridged
the gap. It was our social playground, a place where we could be
ourselves, express our views and de-stress ourselves from the daily
grind.

He was my number 1 fan in most of my blog entries that dealt with
politics or social issues. I felt complimented every time he’d comment on my post or indicated that he liked the links or photos. We shared
the same passion and hope for our country. His music video links
lifted my spirits and gave me smiles when the song is in sync with my
current mood. Yes, we had fun even we were just having a ball in our
virtual playground. And I am sure a lot of you in Facebook as well.

My last memory of Nonoy was when he hugged me and said our` goodbyes” He added: “Let’s not wait for 5 years to have reunions. Make it 3 years. We are getting older.”

Each friend is a gift. I’d like to think that Nonoy left me with 3 gifts. and some of these may apply to you.

1. The gift of friendship

Why did Nonoy value the reunion? A friend once asked me “why should
we reconnect when we have gone our separate ways?”

Being with Nonoy and the “Best Friends Forever” helped nurture my
inner child of the present which we all need to do the rest of our
lives…the fun loving, happy, frivolous, joyful, humorous moments when
we were once young and unsophisticated, even if it is replaced with a
sophisticated, mature and more serious me.

Taking a trip into the past via attendance at a college reunion is
relaxing trip for our mind . When we return back to the present, it
will be with a firmer grasp on the treasure that is your past. Nonoy
wanted us to treasure those moments.

2. The gift of Music

We both love our ipods and music collection. I shared Michael
Jackson’s favorite song “Smile”… as we grieved his death, Nonoy
added “This is a very touching song by Charles Chaplin and has touch
our hearts for generations.. MJ will be missed..”

He often laughs whenever I tell him that my speakers are in full blast
whenever I am home alone just so I could groove to the 70’s music.
Grooving to the 70’s music kept us in touch with our inner child just
as reunions did. I thought I had a sizable amount of 70’s music. I don’t know if he was kidding me that he had 10,000 songs. His last message in my inbox was to send my USB flash drive to his home address so he
could fill it up with more seventies songs. I took my time sending it
over to his house. I regret it so much. I took for granted that he
will always be there. I never imagined he’d pass away so soon.

Nonoy, hearing your music in your facebook wall feels like you are
still there soothing our soul.

3. The gift of hope

It’s so easy to be cynical these days and yet, do nothing about our
country’s situation.

Nonoy once said to me “This is why we need to safeguard our election
process and forget the TRAPOS.”

I reassured him that is a project that I am working on.

He continued “Our country now needs someone with high integrity,
someone who walks the talk when it comes to self-sacrifice for public
service.”

At the height of the controversial Con-ass , Nonoy asked me “Why is it
that those people who love their country so much do not find
themselves running our government?”

We shared so much hope for our country. Nonoy and I often
discuss the latest political gossip. We shared the vision of what the
president of our country should be.

Nonoy, I will keep those dreams alive for you through my work during the Election 2010 and beyond.

For all those who grieve the death of Nonoy: family and friends: Death
may have taken Nonoy away from us but death did not take away the
memories in our hearts and in our minds. We grieve because we loved
him so much. Pain is the price we pay for love. . The grief journey
won’t be easy but keep in mind, if you hadn’t love so much you
wouldn’t hurt so much now.

Before closing, let me share Nonoy’s last Youtube post:

The Wheel by Rosanne Cash

Take up the hearts you came to heal.
Put down your dagger and your shield.
You need fear nothing now from me.
I see the essence of the man.
I stand before you as a friend.
The truth moves through us even when we sleep.

And the wheel goes round and round.
And the flame in our souls will never burn out.
And the wheel, and the wheel goes round.

The wheel of life goes on. Life moves on without Nonoy but it does not
mean forgetting his legacy: friendship, music and hope. All of these,
I treasure in my heart.

Nonoy is never really gone because he lives in my heart. Nonoy lives
in your hearts.

——————————-
You might also want to read Positive Mental Energy and Affirmations and my other blogs like Free Filipino Food Recipes, Shopping Finds, Pinoy Food Photo Blog and Techie Gadgets.

How about visiting my daughter’s ukay-ukay blog at ukaymanila.com?

Hope you can drop by! Thanks for visiting…Noemi Lardizabal-Dado.

Add me in Facebook by introducing yourself. My facebook is at facebook.com/noemidado

Thanks To Our Sponsor: Cheap Pinoy Blog Hosting Plans for 950 pesos a year including top level domain name

I encounter all sorts of stories about children’s death in the course of my advocacy work in The Compassionate Friends, a grief support group for those who have lost a child. I often hear the word “if only”, “what if?” and so many words of regret and guilt. I can’t help but cry along with their heartbreaking stories. Sometimes, cause of deaths are accidental, congenital or some complication of a disease. In the Philippines alone, the statistics are alarming.

According to the World Health Organization (WHO), up to 1 million children under the age of five die from pneumococcal disease every year. Pneumococcal disease includes serious, invasive diseases such as meningitis, pneumonia and blood infection (bacteraemia), to less severe, but highly prevalent diseases, such as otitis media, sinusitis and bronchitis. The WHO estimates reveal that over 90% of children’s deaths caused by pneumococcal disease occur in developing countries. Philippines is listed in the top ten of countries with this high mortality rate.

Each year, around 1 million succumb to Invasive Pneumococcal Diseases (IPD); including 82,000 Filipino children. WHO and UNICEF further underscores the importance of IPD by identifying its bacteria, Streptococcus pneumoniae, to be the leading cause of Pneumonia. In the Asia Pacific region alone, 98 children die from Pneumonia every hour – more than AIDS, malaria and measles combined. My friend lost her 4 year old daughter due to this type of pneumonia. Thinking it was just high fever and bad cold, she didn’t know that one of her lungs was already filled with water. At that time, she wasn’t aware that there was a vaccine against pneumonia or it was even there.

Just to give you an idea of Childhood Pneumococcal Disease, here is a backgrounder:
Childhood Pneumococcal Disease Backgrounder

It is unfortunate that our children are still dying and suffering from vaccine-preventable diseases such as pneumococcal disease. If only parents are made aware of these vaccines. I got introduced to the next generation pneumococcal vaccine through the media launch of GlaxoSmithKline (GSK) new 10-valent next generation pneumococcal non-typeable Haemophilus influenzae protein D conjugate vaccine (PHiD-CV). This next generation pneumococcal vaccine provides children with dual-pathogen protection against Streptococcus pneumoniae (S. pneumoniae) and Non-Typeable Haemophilus influenzae (NTHi) , two major causes of childhood infections and their complications. With active immunisation, children in Asia can be better protected against serious, life-threatening childhood diseases such as invasive pneumococcal disease (IPD) and acute otitis media (AOM)2 .

The next question is the affordability of this vaccine. I was told that this vaccine will be 40% more affordable than the existing vaccine in the local market. It is my hope that the government also finds way to provide this vaccine to the poorest sector of our society. Not only should we encourage mothers to vaccinate their children but to encourage them to breastfeed them as long as they can. The antibodies in breast milk may boost the immunity of their children.

Dr. Lulu Bravo

“It’s good news that GSK’s new pneumococcal vaccine can now provide broader protection for children in Asia.” says Professor Lulu Bravo, Vice Chancellor for Research & Executive Director, National Institute of Health, University of the Philippines Manila, and Chairperson, Asian Strategic Alliance for Pneumococcal Prevention (ASAP). She adds, “Pneumococcal disease is the leading vaccine-preventable disease in children under five years old. More needs to be done to better protect our children. More infants should be vaccinated against pneumococcal disease to avoid needless suffering, hospitalisation and doctor visits.”

GSK gave its assurances that they are committed to making their vaccines as accessible to as many people as possible and they will continue to work in partnership with other stakeholders to protect more children from pneumococcal disease in Asia.

Now that is certainly good news. Would you take advantage of this new vaccine for your child?

GSK’s next generation pneumococcal vaccine received approval in the Philippines on 9 July 2009. It is indicated in the Philippines for the active immunisation of infants and children from six weeks up to two years of age against disease caused by S.pneumoniae strains 1, 4, 5, 6B, 7F, 9V, 14, 18C, 19F and 23F and against acute otitis media caused by NTHi.2

About the vaccine

GSK’s new 10-valent, pneumococcal conjugate vaccine has an innovative design. It contains polysaccharides derived from 10 different strains of pneumococcai bacteria most of which are conjugated to protein D from NTHi. GSK’s clinical development programme for the vaccine includes trials in Europe, as well as Africa, Asia and Latin America. As recommended by World Health Organization (WHO), the assessment of potential efficacy against IPD has been based on a comparison of immune responses to the seven serotypes shared between GSK’s vaccine and the currently licensed vaccine, plus additional serotypes 1, 5 and 7F. Importantly, the new vaccine’s immunogenicity, safety and reactogenicity profile is comparable to the currently licensed pneumococcal vaccine, and compatibility with major childhood vaccines has been demonstrated in co-administration studies. The recommended primary vaccination schedule is three doses, plus a booster.
——————————-
You might also want to read Positive Mental Energy and Affirmations and my other blogs like Free Filipino Food Recipes, Shopping Finds, Pinoy Food Photo Blog and Techie Gadgets.

How about visiting my daughter’s ukay-ukay blog at ukaymanila.com?

Hope you can drop by! Thanks for visiting…Noemi Lardizabal-Dado.

Add me in Facebook by introducing yourself. My facebook is at facebook.com/noemidado

Thanks To Our Sponsor: Cheap Pinoy Blog Hosting Plans for 950 pesos a year including top level domain name