Category Archives: Grief Recovery


With Coy at the Celebrating the Lucky 0917 with Globe in 2010. Photo credit: Jane Uymatiao Oh God. No. He is way too young…he is just as old as my eldest girl. Another fine young man gone too soon. It breaks my heart. There are no words to express this gut-wrenching pain. I reach out Read More →


It’s that time of the year that I declutter my home. The library which is located in my home office is often filled with books because my family members are book lovers. As I reviewed the books on the top shelf, I screamed with delight upon discovering my son’s yearbook in Family Montessori Katipunan , Read More →

yolanda typhoon

Seven days after Typhoon Yolanda, and relief is slowly getting through. I will not talk anymore of the devastation but the many emotions that face us today and probably for the next few months. Denial , anger and shock are the initial reactions from this massive devastation caught on photos and videos. I was appalled Read More →

flowers for my son

In every meeting of The Compassionate Friends, we provide positive ways for grief management. We believe that the only way to truly relieve the pain is to work through the grief. Once we had “Creative ways of Remembering your loved one“. The topic was about “Healing through Journaling” or Grief Journaling[/tag] by Leah Eriguel, a Read More →

“Are you paranoid , mom?”. One of my daughters noticed the red and green colored fire extinguishers I placed in every room of the house. I ignored her question as I pointed to the fire exits in their respective bedrooms and gave a quick lecture on how to use the fire extinguishers. One daughter asked, Read More →

When you remember me, it means that you have carried something of who I am with you, that I have left some mark on who I am on who you are. It means that you can summon me back to your mind even though countless years and miles may stand between us. It means that Read More →

A year ago, my daughter shared me an article “Self help: try positive action, not positive thinking” The self-help industry is mired in ideas about positive thinking that are at best ineffective and at worst destructive. If you want to be more confident or successful, says Richard Wiseman, the best thing to do is act Read More →

I miss my babies, my children. My home has been a semi-empty nest since 2010 when my second child flew to Australia to work then eventually taking her post-graduate studies. During college, they lived in dorms close to their school in Quezon City when we used to live in Makati. That wasn’t too bad because Read More →

The Holy Week holds a special meaning in my heart as it’s during this time that my precious son talked about eternal life. How would I have known that he was preparing himself for his death? “When I die, I will be alive again“, Luijoe (with excitement), a month before he became an angel. A Read More →

For many years, my family greeted the Christmas season with great joy and heavy despair. Every Christmas without my son, I sensed my husband saying “I’m not ready yet….”I’m not ready for the annual flood of memories without Luijoe. “ Butch dreaded the sight of the cheerful Christmas decorations especially Santa Claus. I wasn’t ready Read More →

Communities across the globe are joining in The Compassionate Friends on its 16th Annual Worldwide Candle Lighting on December 9, 2012. 16th Worldwide Compassionate Friends Worldwide Candle Lighting  Where: Kiosk area of the Church of the Risen Lord,  Laurel Avenue, UP Campus, QC  Map : Check this google map:  When Date: Sunday , December 9, Read More →

I was four months pregnant in 1985 with my eldest child when I heard the devastating news that my father suffered a serious stroke at the age of 55 years old. Being in Manila while dad was in Cebu, I didn’t know if he’d recover from the massive stroke. I took a leave from work Read More →

My friend Cathy sent me this beautiful article , Butterfly Miracles, from Chicken Soup for the Soul: Grieving and Recovery by Jeanne Wilhelm. I know some of you who read my blog lost someone in their lives. I often use the butterfly as a symbol of hope . There is always a chance of a Read More →

After years of denial, numbing feelings of pain and all sorts of emotions, I finally came true to myself. I learned to take care of myself emotionally through practice and learning new behavioral patterns like Acting as if. I forced myself into positive recovery behaviors, disregarding my doubts and fears, until my feelings caught up Read More →

I had a falling out with two friends a year ago. It doesn’t matter who they are. It started because I felt the need to confront them about their accusations on a certain issue . But no, they refused confrontation and eventually distanced themselves from me. I grew up in an environment where direct communication Read More →

It has been a while. In my dreams, I wept that it woke me up still in tears. I forgot my dream now but I remember Luijoe, my beloved son was in it. Then it occurred to me, today is his 12th Angel year. It has been 12 long years. Imagine, I lived through those Read More →

So if someone says to us, by word or by action, “You should be over that by now,” we can recall the words from the Talmud: “Judge no one before you have been in his place.” When people ask how many kids I have, I always say three children and pretty soon, the question goes Read More →

Luijoe meadow somewhere in the North, where his grandparents live today A few years ago a highly rated and popular TV magazine contacted my husband and I to share our painful experience and grief recovery for their “Holy Week” feature. The theme centered on “The Seven Last Words” and our story will focus on one Read More →

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