How do you know you’re a couple?

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My daily routine consists of waking up at 5:15 AM to drive either of my 2 daughters to work or school by 6:15 AM. During one of these trips, I was caught in traffic at Ortigas Avenue for at least 30 minutes. What to do? To distract myself from the stressful traffic, I take this as an opportunity to chit-chat about anything under the sun. As always, the topic was men. This time, I was curious about how guys and girls these days know they are a couple. I often hear the phrase “she asked me out” or “he asked me out” and that’s it.

I asked Lauren, how is it done these days?

I told her that the first guy who courted me in the mid-seventies asked me “Can you be my girlfriend”? And all I had to do was bat my eyelashes and utter a “yes” or “No” but not after giving the guy at least 2 months of hardship. And all that courtship is done inside the house under the watchful eye of my mother. I was not allowed to have guy visitors if there was no chaperone in the room.

I often begged my younger brother, Ruben, to play with his marbles a few meters away from us . Sometimes I’d bribe him by giving him 5 pesos.

I was not allowed to have dates either. My first date was with my husband and that was when I was 20 years old , on my last semester in college. But my ex-boyfriend didn’t ask me “will you be my girlfriend?”. Instead he smacked me on the lips and yelled for all to hear, “I have the most beautiful girlfriend in UP”. I am is his girlfriend?. haha. I was too shy to contradict him. Besides I liked him a lot. Now you know where Lauren got her unconventional ways. I still envisioned long courtship days, chaperoned visits and flowers.But I was in a dorm and my parents were miles away. They wouldn’t know. I just went along with my boyfriend’s idea that I was his girlfriend.

So I turned to Lauren “so how?”

“Well, usually, when the guy and girl have been going out for quite a while, the question arises …where is this leading to? ” or something along those lines.

Oh really? If I were a single girl in this day and age, I doubt I’d ever have a boyfriend . I doubt I’d ever have the guts to pop that question. I still prefer the old-fashioned method to save me the embarrassment. Or maybe it’s just me.

Do you prefer the old-fashioned way ? Or it’s really a thing of the past?

Noemi Lardizabal-Dado (1389 Posts)

You may contact Noemi (noemidado @ for speaking and consultancy services in the following areas: Parenting in the Digital Age (includes pro-active parenting on cyber-bullying and bullying) ; Social Business ; Reinventing One’s Life; and social media engagement. Our parenting workshop is called "Prep to Prime (P2P): Parenting in the Digital Age (An Un­Workshop)" P2P Un­Workshops are conducted by two golden women in their prime, Noemi and Jane, who have a century’s worth of experience between them. They are both accomplished professionals who chose to become homemakers. This 180­degree turn also put them on a different life course which includes blogging, social media engagement and citizen advocacy. They call their un­workshops Prep to Prime or P2P, for short, to emphasize the breadth of their parenting experience. They tackle different aspects and issues of parenting ­­ from managing pregnancies, prepping for the school years of children, dealing with househelp, managing the household budget, to maximizing one’s prime life and staying healthy through the senior years.