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On Sharing Grief and Grief Share

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For the newly bereaved, November 1 hits them with the reality that it’s their first All Saint’s Day with their precious loved one. It’s their first time to honor the dead with the rest of the country. No wonder, grief is once again featured in the magazines , TV and radio. Last Sunday, Cory Quirino invited The Compassionate Friends to her DZMM radio program with the topic of “Handling Grief and Loss” . The thought of discussing the basics of the grief process in Tagalog caused me to panic. Can you imagine me struggling with words like “pagdalumbhati”? (if I even spelled that right) . How does one say “positive resolution of grief?” The best testimonials would definitely come from the newly bereaved parents who actively worked on their grief with help of The Compassionate Friends. I asked if I could invite more parents to the interview. I dragged 3 newly bereaved parents and Alma Miclat, a co-founder of The Compassionate Friends. A psychiatrist, Dr. Josefina Sayo served as the resource person on the grief process and explained that there is so much stigma attached to grief.

Typhoon Paeng’s update interrrupted the show that the one hour and half show seemed like thirty minutes.

What totally amazed me were these 3 newly bereaved parents who were able to express their loss and testified how sharing their grief truly unburdened some of their pain. We know that pain can never be totally taken away but somehow sharing it to others ease the burden in our hearts. And so The Compassionate Friends continue to come monthly…to meet, to hug, to cry, to laugh to listen and to try to understand another’s story. We come to love each other’s children that we never got to meet. Their faces become almost as familiar as our own children’s countenance and so incredibly dear because they were so special to our friends. In sharing our children’s lives and their deaths, they continue to live on through our stories and our pictures and we are comforted as we grieve together.

Sharing grief is a crucial step in grief work. No wonder my dear friend, Cathy Babao-Guballa started Grief Share, a new grief ministry for all types of losses.

After much prayer and thought, Hector and I were lead to go into a new ministry that seeks to help other bereaved persons move on after a loss. GRIEFSHARE is a 12-week recovery program that tackles the different aspects of the grief experience and provides the participant with tools for moving on. The program runs for two hours every Saturday and begins on November 18, 2006 at the Greenhills Christian Fellowship in Ortigas.

There is no charge to participate and it is open to everyone who has lost a loved one – spouse, child, parent, grandparent, friend. All we ask is that you register ahead of time as we are trying to limit the class size. Information on Griefshare can be found on my new grief education site at — Grief Is A Journey http://mourningtojoy.blogspot.com/

Grief is truly a journey.

4 thoughts on “On Sharing Grief and Grief Share”

  1. Hi,

    I think that grief is a sad and painful undertaking only made bearable by the grace of God. I lost my beloved sister a few years back and that was the only thing that kept me.

    I know Cathy and I truly admire her for how she’s coped with her loss, as I’d like to say the same of you, from the little that I gather here. And I think it’s great that there are people like you who offer understanding and support for those who are newly bereaved which should help others ease even a little of their pain.

  2. @poppycock- we all grieve differently and it’s a process. God worked with you but unfortunately with others, they had to question God first before they moved on to a positive resolution of their grief. The death circumstances and relationship with the loved one determines how our grief work will be processed. It’s different for others. We walk the same road but others walk more slowly than the others.

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