A Filipina Mom Blogger

The Earth Hour 2009 did not stop us from celebrating my nephew’s graduation last year. Through a candle lit dinner, time just passed us by. Dinner continued on at Adarna Food and Culture, despite the darkened ambiance. What was left but to chit-chat with family members and relatives.

This year, Earth Hour will happen on March 27, 2010, from 8:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m.
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It is two months before May 10, 2010, the Election day. The Day we vote for a president and the rest of the national and local posts.

I made a choice.

I have chosen my presidential candidate.

I want my candidate to win.

Yesterday, my husband and I decided to openly support our presidential candidate (not here online). The past month, we began discussing our choices, analyzing and researching on the nine presidential candidates. I am blessed and privileged to have interviewed seven presidential candidates and attended three presidential forums. It has given me an opportunity to understand their platforms, the issues and over-all impression of the presidential candidates. I know their strengths and weaknesses but there can be only one President.
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“Gender equality and women’s empowerment are fundamental to the global mission of the United Nations to achieve equal rights and dignity for all… But equality for women and girls is also an economic and social imperative. Until women and girls are liberated from poverty and injustice, all our goals — peace, security, sustainable development — stand in jeopardy.”

How appropriate is it that the theme of this year’s International Women’s Day – which is observed worldwide on 8 March – is “Equal Rights, Equal Opportunities: Progress for All”.

I am reminded of my interview with senatorial candidate Yasmin Busran Lao last January. The interview nearly didn’t take place. Yasmin wanted just one blogger for this interview. She wasn’t sure how bloggers did interviews. I assured her that I will be fair that I will just let her do the talking. Shy at first, she warmed up as I asked her to narrate her story, the reasons for running as a senator.

She mused “I have been doing it anyway. I have been advocating for women seizing the center of power and reframing politics ..and how can I go to the community of women and talk about women’s political participation when I was given the opportunity and I say “No”? What message will she give to the women if she said “no”? When the opportunity came, Yasmin (otherwise known as Yas) felt she needed to walk the talk.”
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And I know your eyes in the morning sun
I feel you touch me in the pouring rain
And the moment that you wander far from me
I wanna feel you in my arms again

And you come to me on a summer breeze
Keep me warm in your love and then softly leave
And it’s me you need to show ….
How deep is your love?

Oh yes love, we celebrate love every way we can. Milestones are valued.

“How deep is your love?” by the Beegees hit the airwaves in 1977 but it was the song of the season when Butch and I became steadies on March 7, 1978. I played the music on our way to our photo shoot with the best wedding photographers, Mimi and Karl. It was just natural that we chose the UP campus (where we met) for our silver anniversary photo shoot and the celebration of our 32 years as a couple on March 7. Dragging my two girls to join us, the two hour photo shoot was sweet and poignant. I love my husband for being such a good sport knowing he poses stiffly for photos. That’s how love works, I guess.

As he wrapped his arms around me, I loved how the soft breeze cooled the scorching sun hitting us between the branches of the tree. I clutch on to my heart-shaped pendant where a photo of our beloved Luijoe is engraved. “Luijoe is with us, too…in our hearts”. We smile at each other. We are a complete family as we pose, laugh, twirl around and smile for the cameras.
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“A man is but the product of his thoughts what he thinks, he becomes.” Mahatma Gandhi

Whenever something bothers me, I keep reminding myself that we cannot control people’s actions, attitudes and even events. I label it as the Three P’s (People, Places and the Past). The only thing we can control is our attitude. But it isn’t that easy. One of the choices in recovery is choosing what we want to think and using our mental energy in a positive way.

At Boracay, I bared my shoulders by wearing a tube top. I looked at myself at the mirror and admired how much I lost weight. From afar, I noticed a bump on my right shoulder, round and quite big. Anything bumpy is worrisome. Today, I visited my doctor and I am told to visit the surgeon which I scheduled on Friday. There is no diagnosis yet. Right now, all I want is good vibes to flow through me.

Positive thinking can be extremely difficult in stressful situations. Positive thinking does not mean thinking in an unrealistic matter or reverting to denial. If I don’t like something, I respect my own opinion. If a problem hits me, I am honest about it. If something isn’t working out, I accept reality. I don’t have to dwell on the negative portions of my experience. So here I am affirming what is good in my life.

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Happy moms know when to have fun.

Happy moms know that they need to take time away from their kids whether it’s a Sony Bravia event in Boracay or just a long bath with a magazine.
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“Because I think the Filipino is worth crying for”. David Briscoe, February 25, 1986

I felt my baby tumble with joy inside my belly as the announcement from the radio blasted out that indeed Cory Aquino was our new president. My baby is now a 23 year old lady turning 24 next month. It’s been 24 years since my joy came in a stream of tears. There were many reasons worth crying for—a sign of relief from the threats of a civil war, the challenges facing the new President, for the citizenry who finally showed the courage to challenge the Marcoses.

I smiled and carressed my belly assuring my unborn baby that she will now be born in a democracy. As a new mother, I desired nothing else but peace, not the turmoil that was about to explode with the cheating of the elections done under a dictatorial regime. Fighting the dictatorship was a struggle that I fought for as a student in the state university.

Ang sarap maging Filipino.

For many years, I idolized Cory Aquino. I looked up to Cory Aquino for having the courage to fight a dictator and restore a democracy. I am forever grateful for that. Never mind if her government faced numerous power struggles. Never mind if Kamaganak Inc allegedly gained from her presidency. Many years in denial. It took the same daughter to shake off that “romantic affair” with the People power revolution. It is easy to romanticize while pondering at what EDSA meant, especially in light of Cory’s death.

The outpouring in Cory’s funeral meant the expression of longing for honesty, decency, and democracy. It does not mean that this automatically transfers to a son or a daughter by means of heredity.

Nick Perlas adds that “What it does mean is that the nation is longing for a leader that had the traits of Cory PLUS the capacity to transform institutions and systems.”
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“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” George Bernard Shaw

I caught the George Bernard Shaw quote a few days ago and it made me reflect back on my life. It is almost 10 years that my son passed away.

I do not recognize myself from the person I was in the past. I am more confident. I appreciate myself more. I have a new life, helping bereaved parents through the Compassionate friends , blogging and new media publishing. I am having the time of my life and feeling beautiful, loved and being loving.

I was a full time mother from 1987 till 2005 where I stayed home most of the time. Though I am proud to be a mom, I knew I was more than just a mother. I felt wanting to do more when the kids went to college. There was this inner desire to provide public service like my father did.

In losing my son, I was meant to bring out my service oriented nature to other bereaved parents and the nation. It brought my dormant talents of organizing and initiating service oriented projects (filipinaimages.com, blogwatch.ph, compassionatefriends.info, Philippine Blog Awards)
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My daughter studied the birth certificate from the National Statistics office. She laughed as she saw the occupation of her parents.

Father- Law student
Mother- Homemaker

She could not believe her father was just a law student. I glanced at my husband, “Wasn’t it just yesterday we were struggling newly weds?”. Looking up from her birth certificate, she asked “Mom if I was born this year, what occupation will you place?”

I replied ” blogger”.

My answer brought a smile to her lips. She nodded “I thought so too.”
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