6 Comments on Denial

Have you ever been in denial? Of course, we face denial now and then. It’s not necessarily bad. It’s a way of protecting ourselves from pain, at least temporarily.

Denial is such a powerful tool. Never underestimate its ability to cloud your vision. For many reasons, we have become experts at using this tool to make reality more tolerable. We have learned well how to stop pain caused by reality not by changing our circumstances but by feigning that our circumstances are something other that what faces us.

To those in denial don’t be too hard on yourself. While one part of you was busy creating a fantasy-reality, the other part went to work on accepting the truth.

Now, it’s time to find that courage. Face the truth. Let it sink in gently.

When we can do that, we will have moved forward.

Noemi Lardizabal-Dado (1388 Posts)

You may contact Noemi (noemidado @ for speaking and consultancy services in the following areas: Parenting in the Digital Age (includes pro-active parenting on cyber-bullying and bullying) ; Social Business ; Reinventing One’s Life; and social media engagement. Our parenting workshop is called "Prep to Prime (P2P): Parenting in the Digital Age (An Un­Workshop)" P2P Un­Workshops are conducted by two golden women in their prime, Noemi and Jane, who have a century’s worth of experience between them. They are both accomplished professionals who chose to become homemakers. This 180­degree turn also put them on a different life course which includes blogging, social media engagement and citizen advocacy. They call their un­workshops Prep to Prime or P2P, for short, to emphasize the breadth of their parenting experience. They tackle different aspects and issues of parenting ­­ from managing pregnancies, prepping for the school years of children, dealing with househelp, managing the household budget, to maximizing one’s prime life and staying healthy through the senior years.

  • Accepting reality is the hardest thing to do (when it’s all about losing someone you love so dearly). Waking up every morning realizing that your precious child is not going to be around for good just makes it more unbearable. But denying the truth about the reality can bring turmoil to our lives. Moving on is not an easy task. I believe that leaning to God for answers is the best way to do away with denial.

  • accepting reality is like taking a bitter pill. its just so hard. i am actually in denial right now..

    thats why you get to see me scribble some notes in my facebook from time to time…

  • @bill- sometimes I had to shut myself to stop feeling the pain. it doesn’t help in the long run.

    @eric- it’s okay eric. I’ve been there.

  • It will take a while to accept like when someone died in the family. first thing is the denial stage and lastly the letting go.

    nice post!

    btw, dear, i have a new domain. check it out ah. *mwah*

  • It’s okay to be in denial… but it should have a deadline.

    I remember a friend of mine telling me about the usual stages that a person goes through when faced with trauma – DABDA.

    Stands for:
    Denial – Anger – Bargaining – Depression – Acceptance
    (Psych majors please correct if I’m wrong)

    Fitz’s last blog post..Little Known Ways To Save Money When Eating Out

  • @fitz- that’s correct but in grief , recovery is not linear but rather like a rollercoaster or one step forward, two steps backward.