Mom fashion is a quandary

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What exactly is the mommy look? Is there a fashion style for forty-something moms who have college kids? Often my girls tell me “but please don’t dress too young. You’re a mommy”. Then they also adviced me, “No mommy jeans look” as I shopped for new jeans. These kids can’t make up their mind. Should I not be “too style-ey” or dumpy looking? Then my husband goes “Nothing too revealing”. I can’t be too stylish, too sexy or too dumpy. Maybe they meant middle-of-the-road wasteland of clothing that’s “practical” yet “stylish”. The unsolicited advice is well taken of course, but I choose to shop for clothes that I like anyway. Based on this blog quiz, What’s Your Fashion Style?, I am girly.

Your Fashion Style is Girly

You dress to look beautiful and show off what you’ve got
Dresses, skirts, heels… whatever it takes to turn heads
You love feeling like a girl in any setting
Even your workout clothes are cute and feminine!

I like girly or feminine things but I don’t think I am kikay. What a word. If I were still a teen, I ‘d like to be groovy but I’d be in the dark ages if I still use that word. True, I dress to make myself look and feel good with certain limitations of course. I don’t wear plunging necklines in public places except in family parties. Pretty earrings and necklace has always been my thing even when I was single. So when that fashion trend was revived, I quickly added that to my collection.

If you noticed, I sport a new haircut (see here) . The hazards of driving the girls to their favorite hairstylist brought this transformation. The girls protested when I said it’s my turn to have a haircut. I warned the hairstylist “The girls don’t want me to sport a trendy look so cut it in a way that I will still look like a mommy”. Really, fashion style will never erase the fact that I am still a mother. I think the girls were used to my boring look during their childhood days. Things have changed now. Their daddy is getting more attractive to ahem , younger women as he gets older and wiser. Mommy has to continue to look good for herself and their daddy.

Noemi Lardizabal-Dado (1386 Posts)

You may contact Noemi (noemidado @ for speaking and consultancy services in the following areas: Parenting in the Digital Age (includes pro-active parenting on cyber-bullying and bullying) ; Social Business ; Reinventing One’s Life; and social media engagement. Our parenting workshop is called "Prep to Prime (P2P): Parenting in the Digital Age (An Un­Workshop)" P2P Un­Workshops are conducted by two golden women in their prime, Noemi and Jane, who have a century’s worth of experience between them. They are both accomplished professionals who chose to become homemakers. This 180­degree turn also put them on a different life course which includes blogging, social media engagement and citizen advocacy. They call their un­workshops Prep to Prime or P2P, for short, to emphasize the breadth of their parenting experience. They tackle different aspects and issues of parenting ­­ from managing pregnancies, prepping for the school years of children, dealing with househelp, managing the household budget, to maximizing one’s prime life and staying healthy through the senior years.

  • haha this reminds me of me and my mom! except that my mom generally has better fashion sense than i do, and she can afford the “nicer” stuff haha so she usually looks cooler than i do. i’ve come to terms with it 🙂 haha! of course there are times that i also tell her she looks too young and she has to “dress her age” :p our tastes in bags/shoes are kinda similar though, which is good for me coz i get her hand-me-down bags 🙂

  • @cris- my kids have great fashion sense naman. I think I have some fashion sense and they end up borrowing my accessories. We were once young so we forget…that we are moms. hehe

  • lemon


    When she was still alive, Mama always made an effort to dress her age without being dowdy. Now that I’ve become a mom too, I realize that developing a unique fashion sense is tricky. I remember that a few years back, my friends and I agreed that even if we reached a certain age, none of us would ever wear this frumpy dress, or this too sexy attire. I guess classic and simple, with interesting accessories thrown in, is still the best.

  • @lemon- there is a temptation for me to dress wild thinking I am still a teen. *sigh* And I remember those haunting words from my girls and my hubby

  • Jane

    I’m 43, and my husband helped me put this together. He’s a big blogger, but it’s new to me. I really like this sites clothes & their prices! Here’s my suggestion for the 40 something fashion dilemma…

    Take a look at their website by clicking their logo below, if you like their stuff then click on the cell phone below and sign up! Enjoy!

  • Janeen

    Ladies, having children is not an early retirement for looking and feeling sexy. Being forty and over is not the end of you expressing your sensuality or acknowledging that you have still “got- it”. You dressed your kids because that was your job as a mom. It is not their job to dress you. I would never want to embarrass my children. However, I am still a very sexy and attractive mom (respectively) after 14 years of marriage and I am going to make it last as long as I can because it make me feel alive. It’s 2008 and I challenge you to spice up your wardrobes, of course within your personal level of tolerance. Experience the impact it will have on your confidence. When you look good, you feel good. When you look great, you feel great!