I am grateful for the New Year 2021 and the challenges we faced in 2020.

“Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.” MARCEL PROUST

gratitude

The hot and humid afternoon coupled with a lot of deadlines made me lazy for the rest of the day. A text message arrived. It was from my husband.

I have something for you…_______________ because I love you. See you later dear.

*kilig* His text message thrilled me to pieces. No, it wasn’t the gift. It was the reason…”because I love you”. I am pretty used to my husband’s flowery words via text message or email but that afternoon, I was full of gratitude that his text message spoke of love. Random moments like that just lifted my spirits.

I replied back “love me? kilig naman” as if we are still steadies. I couldn’t help smiling the rest of the afternoon and shared it with my best friend.

My husband is not perfect. There are days when I just clam up and huddle up in my sanctuary while he retreats to his cave. (Yes friends of hubby, I know you are reading this so please don’t embarrass my husband and cite my entries. He doesn’t read my blog. )

But that afternoon, I affirmed an important concept to get me through this stressful time and that is gratitude. When my husband arrived that night, I gave him a hug “Thank you my dear husband” and it was not meant for the gift. I thanked him for being sweet and romantic at random moments.

If I had the time, I will write a book for men on “How to Flatter a Woman”. Through the years, I scrawled down snippets of sweet nothings in a diary, when my husband would pour his endearments to me. I like looking back at them to remind me that his strengths outweighs his weaknesses. I choose to focus on that strength. Gratitude makes things right. Gratitude turns negative energy to positive energy.

I am so thankful that my husband is loving and devoted to me. My heart is filled with gratitude.

Yes, the sweetness of gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. I have learned the magical lesson that making the most of what I have turns it into more. It is not material gifts that make me happy. It is love. I can affirm my gratitude any day I want to but I want to dedicate this gratitude entry especially to my husband.

Thank you my dear, husband.

my husband and I

As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them. ~John Fitzgerald Kennedy

Thanksgiving day being the most celebrated holiday in the states reminds me of the word “gratitude”.


A few years ago, I was planning to bake Pumpkin Pie because I remembered just how delicious it was during my visit in Missouri a few years ago.

My daughter said “we’re not Americans, mom so why should we celebrate Thanksgiving Day”. (But did you know that, for several decades, Thanksgiving had also been celebrated in the Philippines?)

I protested “but I love Pumpkin Pie” and I want to bake it to feel like I am celebrating with my brother and sisters in the states. My siblings often wished I’d visit them during Thanksgiving day but I just tell them that I will be with them in spirit. So I thought baking the Pumpkin pie was a great idea

But…

Nope, my daughters refused to acknowledge Thanksgiving day the American way.

As a compromise, I agreed to bake Pumpkin Pie on Christmas day and thought that was the end of the discussion.

Then, I gleefully announced “let’s honor and reflect on your paternal great-great American grandfather who arrived in the Philippines in 1921 from Iowa. He was quite an adventurer just like you, Lauren.”

Photo: Great great grandfather of my husband
I think that settled the issue.

I love looking back to the past and knowing the roots of my family. I like knowing their way of life, their personalities and quirks to see if these were passed on to my children.

I am grateful for the life and the traditions that have been passed on through the years.

Thanksgiving day being the most celebrated holiday in the states reminds me of the word “gratitude”. I can affirm my gratitude any day I want to but I want to dedicate this entry especially for my siblings who will celebrate Thanksgiving day. I want to share my gratitude to them.

In honor of Thanksgiving Day, I have a lot to be thankful for today and everyday of my life.

gratitude
1. I am thankful for second chances and a new normal.

2. I am thankful for the laughter that rings true in my home. There’s nothing like a family who laughs together.

3. I am thankful for financial challenges because it taught us discipline that money can be budgeted wisely for basic necessities.

4. I am thankful for a loving husband that never gave up on me.

5. I am thankful for the excruciating pain brought about by my son’s death because it transformed me into a more compassionate person.

6. I am thankful for my two girls, that despite the turbulent teen years due to their sibling’s death, they never resorted to drugs or alcohol.

7. I am thankful of new and old friendships ,a comfortable place to be myself.

8. I am thankful for negative feedback as I can make an honest assessment of myself without jeopardizing my identity.

9. I am thankful for the internet, blogging and all of YOU, twitter followers, the lurkers and readers of my blog as you help me fulfill my mission in life.

10. I am thankful to God who I thought abandoned me but never really left me after all.

gratitude Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. I have learned the magical lesson that making the most of what I have turns it into more. I have learned an important concept to get me through this stressful time and that is gratitude. I learn to say thank you, for all these problems and feelings. I am full of gratitude because today’s pain could be tomorrow’s joy.

What are you thankful for?

My three siblings in the US once sent me a Thanksgiving prayer citing our parents for the gifts we continue to receive even after their deaths. There will be one Thanksgiving day that I will surely join in their celebration. In honor of Thanksgiving Day, I have a lot to be thankful for today and everyday of my life.

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. I have learned the magical lesson that making the most of what I have turns it into more.

1. I am thankful for the lessons on pain due to my son’s death because it transformed me into a more compassionate person.

2. I am thankful for the marital rift because it has brought me and my husband together for a second wind in marriage. Love is lovelier the second time around, indeed.

3. I am thankful for financial challenges because it taught us discipline that money can be budgeted wisely for basic necessities.

4. I am thankful for loving husband that never gave up on me.

5. I am thankful for my two girls, that despite the turbulent teen years due to their sibling’s death, they never resorted to drugs or alcohol.

6. I am thankful for in-law’s differences because it made me more appreciative of myself without any pretenses.

7. I am thankful for the internet and all my visitors as it is one way of fulfilling my mission in life.

8. I am thankful of negative feedback as I can make an honest assessment of myself without jeopardizing my identity.

9. I am thankful of new and old friendships, a comfortable place to be myself.

10. I am thankful to God who I thought abandoned me but never really left me after all.

gratitudeSometimes in life, things just happen too fast. We barely solve one problem then another problem crops up. We feel great in the morning but by nightfall we could be wallowing in misery. Everyday , I face interruptions, delays, changes and challenges. I have learned an important concept to get me through this stressful time and that is gratitude. I learn to say thank you, for all these problems and feelings. I don’t like this experience but Thank You anyway. I had to force gratitude until it became second nature to me. Gratitude helped me stop trying to control outcomes. Gratitude makes things right. It is the key that unlocked positive energy in my life.

I am full of gratitude because today’s pain could be tomorrow’s joy.

In the hustle and bustle of daily life, we tend to be very distracted and forget to appreciate the things that matter in our lives.

thank you day

Let’s start with gratitude.

Gratitude came from Latin word gratia that means graciousness, grace or gratefulness. It’s meaning is deeper than just happiness. It is having a thankful appreciation for the things that one receives, may it be material or not. Gratitude comes from the acknowledgment that there is an external factor contributing to a person’s happiness. Maintaining an attitude of gratitude gives us reasons to connect to other people and acknowledge the existence of those around us.

Why say Thank you? 

Several researches show that expressing gratitude has indeed positively impacted one’s well-being. A study made by two psychologists from the University of Miami and California proved that a group of people who wrote about the things they were thankful for for 10 weeks were more optimistic, exercised more and had fewer visits to the doctor than the other groups who were instructed to write about the things that displeased them.

Another study showed that couples who said ‘thank you’ and acknowledged each other often were more positive towards each other and were more comfortable in expressing issues in their relationship. Managers who also recognized their workers and thanked them for their efforts have also become more motivated employees.

In another summary of different studies, people who keep a gratitude journal were reported to have fewer physical symptoms, more exercise, less physical pain and slept better. People also tend to relax when they are grateful. In a gratitude visit, 35 percent of participants reduced their depressive symptoms and 30 percent of those who had a journal had lowered depressive symptoms. People who also count their blessings had a significant decrease in their systolic blood pressure level. And those who expressed gratitude required less time to fall asleep and had more vitality and energy when they wake up.

appreciation

In addition to these researches, these are some more of the reasons why gratitude can help boost a person’s happiness:

  • It encourages reflection of positive life experiences
  • It boosts self-esteem and self-worth
  • It promotes building of social networks and strengthening existing relationships.
  • It encourages selfless acts and behavior.
  • It lessens negative feelings like anger, bitterness and greed.
  • It releases stress and helps in achieving a deeper sleep.

Cultivating Gratitude

Naturally-positive people are indeed lucky to have a healthy outlook in life. But for many, the attitude of having gratitude can be cultivated through adapting some of these habits.

  • Always have positive reminders – be conscious when you are grumpy, in a bad mood and about to complain about something. Think of three or four things you are thankful for. Think of the reasons why you love your job and why you are working hard. Remind yourself that you are lucky to have a job that could sustain your family, etc. By having positive reminders, it would become easier to shift to a healthier attitude.
  • Learn to compare right – we tend to become insecure or feel jealous of other people who have more than what we have or can do more than what we are capable of doing. This kind of comparison makes one feel inferior. But in cultivating the attitude of gratitude, you should compare yourself to those who have less than what you have and be thankful that you have more. And for people that have more than what you have, think of them as a guide and inspiration.
  • Keep a gratitude journal – develop the habit of writing events and experiences that make you smile and the things that you are grateful for. By doing this daily, you are able to catalog your happy memories, which you can look back to and prevent you from feeling down.
  • Meditate – having time to ‘be in the moment’ without judgment gives you time to focus and be grateful for the simple things such as the warmth of the sun and the sound of your inner peace while meditating.

It is not easy to form a habit, but by practicing these tips in just two to three weeks, you will not only become happier but you will also be a healthier person.

Image from Flickr.com. Used under CC license. Some rights reserved.

 

by Tanya Jamon-Navarro as originally posted at Cultivating an attitude of gratitude , Philippine Online Chronicles.

Last night, my nephew, the son of Oscar, my late brother asked me if I knew the notes of his dad’s award winning composition Pangarap ng Musmos (Dream of the Youth) which was played over 30 years ago in an Ateneo College Music Festival. I told him I didn’t have it but if he can hear the notes, it is easy to take it down. Honestly, I haven’t heard my brother’s composition for a long time now and decided to turn it on again. As I listened to “Pangarap ng Musmos”, the tears just rolled down my cheeks as the lilting music streamed through my bedroom. As I watched a video of my brother playing Love Story on the piano, the more I sobbed. What irony! He was dying of leukemia as he played the melody.

I missed my brother so much and listening to his music made me feel he was right there in the room, playing it for me. The heartfelt passion as he played every note in the piano moved me so much. I also missed my other brother Reuben and my dad and mom. I counted 4 deaths in my family of origin. not counting my own son. Five deaths in my immediate family.

It is easy to count what we do not have.

I cannot ignore fleeting moments of nostalgia. In my sadness, I assessed what I had. I counted my blessings.

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