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On the Day of the Unborn, my daughter’s 25th birthday

We must not be surprised when we hear of murders, killings, of wars, or of hatred…If a mother can kill her own child, what is left but for us to kill each other? – Mother Teresa


As countries across the globe observe the Day of the Unborn Child today (it is Day of Unborn in Manila) , I will be celebrating the 25th birthday of Lauren , my eldest daughter. I don’t understand why the Catholic church here in the Philippines calls it the “Day of the Unborn” which pretty much sounds like some creepy horror movie like the “Undead”.

Those against the Reproductive Health (RH) bill say they are pro-life and label RH advocates like me as “evil” or pro-abortion.

Well, hear ye.

I am pro-life.

I am for the Reproductive Health Bill.

I am pro-life because I believe that all births should be planned and wanted by their parents.

I am pro-life because I don’t believe in abortion except for special cases e.g. mother dying of high blood pressure

I am pro-life because I believe women do not have to die during childbirth.

Today as I celebrate the 25th birthday of my daughter, I am reminded of the time she was an “unborn”. When my boyfriend proposed marriage to me, we both planned our family size of 3 children. We both wanted a baby right away. See, I did not want to postpone pregnancy only to find out we might have “fertility” problems by the time we were “ready”. I wanted to know the soonest time possible. Besides, when is anyone really “ready”?

It was a year before our planned wedding date when I found this book about “The Billings Method” which women use to monitor their fertility, by identifying when they are fertile and when they are infertile during each menstrual cycle. It is one of the acceptable family planning methods of the Catholic Church. I didn’t know it then but I thought if I knew about the Billings Ovulation method, I will know my fertile and infertile period. It seemed simple enough. I followed the technique below.

In the days leading up to ovulation the cervix responds to oestrogen by producing mucus capable of sustaining sperm survival. This mucus leaves the vagina as the woman is in an upright position. The mucus is observed through the sensation at the vulva and by looking at any discharge. Daily charting of these observations will reveal either an unchanging pattern indicating infertility or a changing pattern of sensation and discharge indicating fertility. Both of these patterns follow the hormonal patterns which control sperm survival and conception.

I even took my temperature every day and charted it. By the time, we got married I knew the pattern. My daughter might not like to hear this but she was born out of the Billings Ovulation Method.

A baby is such a gift of life. As I cradled my beautiful Lauren that day, I remember her small eyes looking at the world around her. Tears of joy overcame me. Every birth of my children always brings me tears of joy. Indeed, babies are a miracle of life.

I have never used contraceptives because I knew how to use the Billings method. I had the opportunity to weigh choices. But does everyone know how? Not all women are open to the idea of touching the discharge from their vulva. Perhaps it is the upbringing that “you are not supposed to touch your vagina except during washing”. Oh yes, one of the nuns told us that. This same religion that promotes the Billings method .

It saddens me that they call it a “demonic RH bill”. The Catholic Church has greatly misinformed the public. They equate contraceptives to abortifacients.

All contraceptive pills and intrauterine conceptive devices (IUDs) are not abortifacients and will not induce abortions. These are meant to suppress ovulation, which stops fertilization and the formation of a fetus.

Life begins at conception. The purpose of today’s memorial is an annual reminder of a fundamental fact: that life begins at conception-for Christ and for all of us.

My babies have been life’s greatest gift to me. I wish every mother this gift of life.

My daughter and I in today’s lunch celebration.

5 thoughts on “On the Day of the Unborn, my daughter’s 25th birthday”

  1. The IUD does little or nothing to interfere with sperm migration or
    fertilization (conception). It achieves its birth control effect primarily
    by preventing the newly conceived human life from implanting in the uterine
    lining (endometrium) and is thus an abortifacient.

    Regarding the pill, obviously many people object to abortifacient drugs because they can cause a loss of human life. Not so many people object to methods of contraception (condoms, diaphrams etc), because these methods prevent new human life being created. Hence, if scientists succeed in convincing people that human life begins after implantation, instead of fertilization, eventually most people will have no objection to the pill. They will have been tricked into believing that human life had not begun when the pill exerted its anti-implantation effect.

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