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Parenting Tips

A family reunion

Our siblings push buttons that cast us in roles we felt sure we had let go of long ago – the baby, the peacekeeper, the caretaker, the avoider…. It doesn’t seem to matter how much time has elapsed or how far we’ve traveled. ~Jane Mersky Leder

My family of origin . We are now in San Francisco.

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We were once a family of seven siblings with a father and mother. With the death of my mom in 1975, my brother in 1990, another brother in 1999 and my father in 2003, only 5 siblings are left. Four sisters and one brother.

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Three of them are now living in the USA while my other sister lives in Manila. During the past years, reunions centered upon the burying of the dead or dying.

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Brothers and sisters are as close as hands and feet

A sister is a little bit of childhood that can never be lost. ~Marion C. Garretty

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We are four sisters. Two (Myrna and Lorna) are based in the United States and two of us (Belen and myself) reside in Manila. I was supposed to join Lorna as an immigrant by now but I declined the application papers in 1986. Myrna (the sister running for City Council here in a city in Califorina) and Lorna moved to San Francisco in 1984 and 1986 respectively to nurse a broken heart. I am particularly close to Myrna. We talked for hours about our love life, our work, and philosophy of life. We love to dress up and be fashionable that we often shared clothes and accessories. There was a time that we even looked alike except I am taller . Unlike my two other sisters, we don’t stay up late to party. We often giggled how the two other sisters scampered to the gate to join their friends , once my dad went up to his bedroom. Dad never knew this.

That was why I felt broken-hearted when Myrna found work in Calfornia in 1984 as an Architect (yes she had a working visa). I wanted to join her. It seemed I was getting nowhere with my 6 year relationship with Butch so I asked him “do you want to marry me or not? If you won’t marry me, that’s okay because I will join my sister in California”.

To my surprise, Butch did not see my question as a threat. He said he’d marry me the following year even if he was just second year in Law school. Though years have kept us apart , our sisterly bond is always there. I can’t quite pinpoint what makes us close. Perhaps, a sister can be seen as someone who is both ourselves and very much not ourselves – a special kind of double.
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I chose to stay, Prof Monsod but what happened?

“I cannot do everything but I can do something. What I can do, I ought to do. And with the grace of God, I will do it” – Prof. Monsod

Economics 11 is just one of my required subjects in my BS Food Technology course . The year 1976 was my Junior year in UP Diliman and I made sure that Prof. Solita Monsod was my Economics teacher because she was known to be kind. None of those terror teachers, please. Economics is not exactly my cup of tea. Science subjects were my forte. I didn’t know it then but it was also the semester that my mother died of breast cancer and Monsod’s kindness helped me pull through with make-up exams.

It was Martial Law times and I don’t recall her talking much about the state of the country like she did in the Honor and Excellence video taken by one of her students last October 5, 2010.

Honor and excellence was ingrained in all UP students. I don’t recall the people responsible for placing it in my thoughts. Prof Monsod however elaborates that the ““fruit of honor and excellence” is ““competence and integrity”.

What hits hard is staying in the Philippines even after graduation.

“The Philippines needs you more than you would ever think. And if it is not you, who else will do it?” says Prof, Monsod

I have often heard the monicker ““Iskolar ng Bayan” in all of my college life. Prof. Monsod drives the same point . As scholars of the people, UP students owe a debt of gratitude to the Filipino people, whose taxes paid for part of that education. Fighting the dictatorship was a struggle that I fought for as a student in the state university.

I understand Prof Monsod.

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Modus Operandi in Metro Manila Taxi Cabs

Updated August 6, 2013- Updated for reporting and getting a cab in Metro Manila

To report crime via social media: Tweet @NCRPOReact or Cellphone number 0999-901-8181 or 0915-888-8181

Send your complaints to LTFRB hotline 0921-4487777 /02- 426-2515.

Report abusive cab drivers via web or an app www.taxikick.com or

TO get a cab: Check @grabtaxiPH . Here is their website: http://grabtaxi.com/

Much as I want to share the good news, I believe you need to read this. My daughter was nearly victimized by a modus operandi yesterday night but she wasn’t because the scene sounded so familiar. As the surreal incident unfolded, she slowly planned her escape. I used to think this stuff happens only in forwarded emails where I can’t verify the truth of the content. Turns out one of these forwarded notes or emails have some truth.

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I learned to let go of my two adult daughters as early as college but totally letting go once they graduated. My girls got to use the public transportation system only in college. By that time, I learned to let go of worry. I am aware of the dangers and risks in our transport system but I didn’t want them to live in a perpetual cloak of fear. During their pre-college years, it was either me or the driver that brought them to school or any destination in Manila. It was easier to control their activities when they were younger since they were a bit obedient in those days with limited social life to boot.

My only request from my girls are SMS updates and be safe and responsible. Not a small feat to ask.

I was expecting my daughter to be at the MRT station in Megamall at 8:30 PM but it was taking her some time. I dragged my husband to drive for me since I was so tired. She sent me a text message, that indicated the plate number of the cab. It is normal practice for my girls to take down the plate number. I pray to high heavens for a blanket of protection to my girls as they commute or drive.

Before I could reply, she called me:”Mom, I nearly got victimized from a modus operandi but nothing was taken from me.

I am here at the Makati Public Safety Authority (MAPSA) outpost near Cash and Carry. Please pick me up here”.

Glad that she was safe, I am thankful that she left the taxicab during a traffic stop.

When we picked her up at the nearby KFC restaurant, the first thing she told us “I read this facebook note about a modus operandi and felt it was going to happen to me..”

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Happy Kainan Monday: Eating Together = Family Happiness

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Don’t we just love family meals together? It’s the perfect time and place to reconnect and to show my girls that they are our priority. Sitting across the table is where and when I find out more about my children’s likes, dislikes, and daily life. Now that they are adults, it is the place where I discover their career plans or frustrations at work. It is actually the family conversations that are important — they are one of the few times parents can find out what their children are up to (and vice versa). As my daughters’ social lives get even busier, it becomes a challenge to get the family to sit down. During these special meals, I make it a point that I dish up something new on the dinner table.

Happy family meals together are long-time tradition that is timeless.

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A daughter is life’s greatest gift to me

lauren-and-meMy beautiful girl turned 24 years old, three days ago and I didn’t get to share it with you. I should have written about it but I was too preoccupied with my surgery the following day. Every time I go to the hospital, I always prepare a notebook that lists passwords and the location of important documents. You never know, right? I first discovered this round lump on my right shoulder when I was in Boracay. I was told it was lipoma but that it was deeply embedded on my muscle. Doctors said I can choose to wait for the operation but I didn’t want to prolong the date for fear the lipoma would grow bigger and encroach on my nerves thus causing me pain.
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Family conversation at the dinner table

paulene-swiss-chocolatesI feel guilty whenever I am away from home. Even if the girls are all grown up, I am just so used to being a stay-at-home mom working at the comfort of my bedroom. As election day nears, I find myself out of the house more often than I ever had in my married life.

Food never fails to bring us together. Last friday, I brought in extra food from a Yehey interview with Erwin Genuino, a Makati mayoral candidate. I sent an SMS to everyone “I am on my way home. Bringing food from Sentro.” It was 9:00 PM and to my surprise, everyone was home on a friday night. Getting the family together for dinner can be difficult especially with adult kids with an active social life.
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a mom blogger in social media

noemidado4My daughter studied the birth certificate from the National Statistics office. She laughed as she saw the occupation of her parents.

Father- Law student
Mother- Homemaker

She could not believe her father was just a law student. I glanced at my husband, “Wasn’t it just yesterday we were struggling newly weds?”. Looking up from her birth certificate, she asked “Mom if I was born this year, what occupation will you place?”

I replied ” blogger”.

My answer brought a smile to her lips. She nodded “I thought so too.”
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JC de los Reyes on Servant Mothers, Humble Nation-Builders

jc-de-los-reyesI have been swamped lately with our interviews of presidential candidates in blogwatch.ph. One of these candidates, JC de los Reyes of Ang Kapatiran party moved me so much. Let me make it clear. I am not supporting a presidential candidate as of the moment. But I like JC de los Reyes, the humble person and public servant, and pretty much how I felt when I met Nick Perlas that I even wrote about his views on new politics. These are competent but not too popular presidential candidates. Well, not yet because they are not given a chance by the Filipino people and more so with media. JC de los Reyes was not invited to the de La Salle forum or even the upcoming January 14 Romulo debate in AIM. But really, these presidential candidates have the compassion, the vision and the clear platform. Truly new politics. It frustrates me that traditional media do not give the same media mileage given to Manny Villar, Gibo Teodoro, Dick Gordon etc. Let the electorate decide not those stupid surveys to bring in ratings or brisk sales.
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a mom blogger who advocates constructive engagement in issues on family & society.
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