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Menopausal Pregnancy

No I’m not pregnant. I thought I was. The past few weeks was so stressful. My husband worried over the state of my health. Imagine, if I had blogged “I’m 49 and I’m pregnant“. Would I cry or laugh if that happened? When I confided my fears to my daughter “I don’t want to hear it. It’s disgusting” It must seem embarassing to her if we conceived a baby at our age. Heck, some of my high school classmates are grandmothers already. Not that I want to be a grandma. Five years ago, I thought I wanted to have another baby. My obstetrician-gynecologist did a thorough physical checkup and declared that my eggs were that of a 39 year old woman. The hitch then was my diabetes. My husband and I decided not to pursue another child.

I have been injecting insulin in lieu of oral meds for the past weeks as precaution and just finishing the rest of the stock. It’s not a far-fetched idea to be pregnant at my age. My sister in law mentioned that her sister bore a healthy girl at the ripe old age of 51. My other sister in law is a menopausal baby. Her mom was 46 years old then. I know two other friends who bore their child when they were in their mid-forties. It’s possible but very risky. Dozens of babies are being born every year to women over the age of 50 who have had in vitro fertilization (IVF) in the UK . I don’t think anyone has tried that here in the Philippines. I won’t take my chances. There is an increased risk of heart attack, stroke and hemorrhaging and, because of the additional pressure placed on our older bodies, we are more susceptible to high blood pressure, pre-eclampsia and diabetes. Much as I love babies, I will just wait for my grandchildren to arrive in the far future (erm not anytime soon).

19 thoughts on “Menopausal Pregnancy”

  1. I dont think there’s anything wrong with having a baby at 49 but if I were your daughty I don’t know what I’d feel about it. When mom got pregnant with my younger brother I was like, “ewww” but looking back, I realized that I was actually jealous 🙁

  2. Susie: I don’t know if it’s jealousy. The message I got was “EWW” too. You’re right , barring health reasons, there’s nothing wrong with having a baby at 49. I guess I felt ashamed confiding about it to family and friends.

  3. Ive always been fascinated with this layout (Kubrick). I got your link from my friend’s site pinoyunderground and i realized that I’ve actually been to one of your blogs before. anyway, it’s ok to be pregnant at that age but it’s a bit off especially since your daughter is already in college 🙂

  4. personally, i’m more concerned as to the health-risks of the mother and child, than what others say about it. by the way, is it plain serendipity that you’re discussing the topic today?wink!

  5. Thea: I think it’s that the age gap is wide. I worried more about the health.

    Lemon: the health risks are really high. serendipity? I am not so sure . hehe, i think it’s because it’s belly dancing day and I blame the belly dancing *wink*

  6. My kumare is expecting her second child any time now. She’s 45 and she cried when she first learned of her pregnancy. Her only other child is already 11 years old. I know that she’s happy now that she’s having this child but she had really mixed emotions before. She’s not that young and she has hypothyroidism which makes her always weak. And I do understand her feelings. I’m a little younger than her and I do have aches and pains here and there. I don’t know if I’ll have the energy to stay up at nights and when that baby turns into a toddler to run after him/her. But of course I also know that if it was me, I would welcome that baby and love him/her as much as I love my other kids.

  7. niceheart: It’s mostly fear. That’s why I had to confide to my daughter because IF I did have a child, she will have to have some mother role aside from being the eldest sister.

  8. i am kind of amused thinking of your daughter’s “ewww” reaction. I guess it was not only because of the possibility of you having a baby at 49, but the idea itself of mom and dad still doing “it”? ewww…… at their age??? ewww.

    I can relate to her 100% because i still get ewwwwwy at the idea of my own parents … and I am 38 already!

    What is it about us? Is this universal or just a Filipino thing?

    What makes us think that only us in our own generation can have that privilege and that those who are older, even if only by one generation, should already behave or make it so secret no one will eveknow, otherwise, ewwwww…!

  9. I feel the same with Olga… if it’s MY parent’s, I’d feel like Ewwww! But if it’s anyone else, it’s okay. I guess your daughters, like me, think that their parents gave virgin births. 🙂 Pregnant or not pregnant, do relax and take care of yourself Noemi!

  10. I had been going through menopause for a few years before I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy on May 19th, 2006. I did not find out I was pregnant until I was almost six months. All the symptoms were similar to menopause. When I first found out I cried and also felt very scared. Fortunately for me, my husband was very supportive from the beginning. This is our first child together. He has four children from a previous marriage (he is 58)ranging from 25-32 years. I have two children from a previous marriage ages 20 & 17. We try not to think to much about how old we will be when…..We have decided to take it one day at a time, and just love him. We feel he is a miracle baby and a blessing.

  11. I am 48 years old, and had been going through menopause for a few years,before I gave birth to a beautiful healthy baby boy on May 19, 2006. I did not find out I was pregnant until almost six months. All the symptoms were similar to menopause. When I first found out I cried and felt very scared. Fortunately for me, my husband was very supportive from the beginning. This is our first child together. He has four children from a previous marriage ages 25-32. I have two children from a previous marriage ages 17 & 20. We try not to think too much how old we will be when…We have decided to take it one day at a time and just love him. He is truly a blessing.

  12. I can sooo relate to your daughter’s reaction. When I first started my premenopausal stage, I hadn’t had a period in 3 months. My husband said, “Are you sure you are not pregnant?” I freaked out! I hadn’t even considered it since he had been snipped! But our friends had a post-snipped baby so I knew it could happen. My daughter got wind of our conversation and we told her of our concern. Same reaction EWWWWW! That is so gross! I actually took a pregnancy test so we could both sleep at night. It was extremely embarassing walking into the local pharmacy where we have shopped for 15 years and buying a test! Anyway, I wasn’t pregnant and now am beginning menopause and my hormones are raging just as if I were pregnant…just ask my husband!

  13. I’m 46 and my wife is 41. We just learned that she is pregnant yesterday. Problem is our 2 sons are 17 and 15 and we are wondering if we are still up to it. Its been a while since our last pregnancy. Last week, instead of her usual menes, my wife bled intermittently so we thought she must be experiencing menopause or hormonal changes. Still in shock. Can somebody talk some sense into me.

    1. Max,

      I gave birth to our beautiful daughter at age 50. She is three now and although we do get tired sometimes, husband is 53 also, we wouldn’t have it any other way. We had IVF with her so we were hoping to get pregnant. By the way, I am also a grandmother. I hope all has gone well so far with the pregnancy, i see it’s been almost 6 months since you posted. Oh, by the way, my older children adore our baby girl. Good luck and God bless.

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