A few weeks ago, Japan Broadcasting Corporation , a TV and Online program on NHK, contacted me to participate on their monthly international debate program called “Global Debate WISDOM”. This month’s topic is about “What can the world do to stop bullying?”. I agreed to join this volunteer interview and let the Japanese audience hear my advice .
It is a fact that school Bullying is a world common problem. So far, we have seen so many different approaches and programs to end bullying. But yet, there is no perfect solution to end bullying since there are still millions of kids suffering from daily bullying at school and outside the school.
Last October, a middle school student in Shiga prefecture in Japan committed suicide after going through the intense bullying that included “practicing a suicide (choking a neck)” and “practicing a funeral”. After a boy killed
himself, school and educational board denied the fact that there were bullying. It created a huge social upheaval after many students testified that there was a bullying. By this incident, the Japanese public rediscovered the untrustworthiness in the school system in Japan.
NHK gave me the link to the Movie list interview and these two videos.
Video 1
Many US states have enacted a law that bans bullying and makes schools and teachers fully responsible for bringing in anti-bullying measures. Who should be ultimately responsible for establishing policies against bullying?
To prevent bullying at schools, what measures should schools and teachers take?
NHK is going to introduce a part of my movie in their TV show tonight Saturday, August 25 Part1 22:00 – 22:50 and Part2 23:00 – 23:49 (JST). It is a LIVE show, so they apologize in advance if the VTRs cannot be played due to unavoidable circumstances.
In the nineties, bullying seemed insignificant at least for social bullying. Even if I fought it out in school, I was the only parent who complained. My daughter continues to add “The sad part is that guidance counselors, teachers, and even some parents don’t think much of bullying. They pass it off as play, or maybe an early life lesson: the world can be a terrible place filled with people who will treat you with undeserved cruelty.”
Programs to help reduce bullying start with a comprehensive approach that involve a collaboration between students, parents, the school and the community. Positive change will result when all parties concerned become involved stakeholders and take personal responsibility for standing up , voicing out and eliminating bullying.
Everyone from the parents, educators, the students and community should stand up and voice out that bullying should stop. Domestic violence should stop. Preventing and stopping bullying involves a commitment to creating a safe environment where children can thrive, socially and academically, without being afraid.
Creating a Safe Environment for Young Minds
Malayan High School for Science invited me to talk about “Creating a safe environment for Young minds” particularly on cyber-bullying. It was also the Unveiling, Launching, and Signing of the MHSS Safe School Program.
I laud the school’s effort in creating a safe environment for young minds. The school, the students and parents are all part of the solution . I wish I were still a parent with school children. I would have enrolled my children there. I know I would be able to work hand in hand with my kids and the school. In the nineties, I was helpless because the school did not want to cooperate with me. Even if I coached my kid at home , my efforts did not bear fruit.
I am impressed that MHSS provides a safe learning environment for students and that they consider this a top priority of every school. With a safe environment, students will be motivated to take up new challenges, and to remain focused in learning.
The proactive approach to preventing cyber bullying
Children should always remember that safety is their number one concern. They need to know that telling is not tattling. Students should know it is safe to inform trusted adults about what is really going on and also teach adults about new technologies that kids are using to bully. The more senior students can serve as mentors and inform younger students about safe practices on social media. I presented a video on cyber bullying awareness with catchy lyrics from Taylor Swift’s song entitled “Mean”.
During my days as internet safety head in the mid-nineties, I helped kids around the world as they built the content of their online journal or websites. One of these kids is now 28 years old. I met him when he was only 12 years old. So I asked him what he thought of cyber bullying. He provides valuable input.
The web is making the world much smaller, in ways that we don’t quite yet understand. With this smaller community we also have a great responsibility with how we treat one another. People, especially kids and teenagers, have to understand that everything we put on the Internet can be saved and it can come back to haunt us. Any job or graduate school recruiter has the obligation now, to Google your name before they think about offering you an interview or offer.If you have a friend who is cyber bullying someone, you have the responsibility to tell that friend to stop, not only because it is wrong, but also because it will cause harm to that person’s digital presence in the future.
For the people who are the recipients of that bullying, I would say the same thing. Expect everything put online to stay online, forever. If someone is cyber bullying you, document document document – through screenshots or whatever means you have available. That person must stop and apologize, because whatever he or she is doing will affect them later if they do not manage their digital presence.
One may get rid of school bullying once they graduate from high school but the online bullying can persist and move on to cyber harassment later on. It is important to take this proactive stand and prevent from being a victim.
I hope the students become more proactive with their safety and be part of the solution. Make a stand to stop bullying in any form. With the help of their school and their parents, I hope the students create a positive environment for themselves, their peers at school and on social media.
What does education mean to most of us in the cities? When my kids were then going to school, it meant yelling at them at 5:00 AM to wake up so they wouldn’t be late for their school bus when it arrives at 6:00 AM. Sometimes, I would drive them to school especially during exam days. Those days seemed stressful to me just because I wake up so early in the morning. I have had it easy, I guess. For most children, it means getting up and commuting through jeepneys or tricycles. Sometimes, it meant walking to school.
But for some determined children in Isla Mababoy, Brgy. Guinhadap, Monreal, Masbate, it means getting up and wearing swimwear just to get to their class. These kids are determined to get an education because it is their only ticket out of poverty.
It is a tough swim for the kids from Isla Mababoy. It’s a 300-meter swim (around 20-30 minutes) from the island of Mababoy to the main island of Guinhadap.
Watch this video:
Yellow Boat of Hope Foundation
I have been aware of Jay Jaboneta’s Yellow boat project since April 2011. His story of seeing kids swim to school in Zamboanga and doing something to help them touched me.
It started with a Facebook wall post and soon help poured in. Yes it was a life-changing facebook wall post. In less than a year, many schoolchildren have stopped swimming to school and help did not stop there because the project gives assistance to their families and community.
The boat’s name is Bagong Pag-asa” (New Hope), to signal a new beginning for the kids in recognition of their determination to obtain an education no matter the hardship.
The Philippine Funds for Little Kids NOW known as the Yellow Boat of Hope Foundation have since provided these communities in Masbate and Zamboanga, yellow school boats . It does not stop there. The Foundation has since moved on to helping support them through provision of other school supplies, medical/dental missions to their communities, scholarships and even through livelihood programs.
The Yellow boat for kids
Thanks to Eton International School and Jacqueline Marzan Tolentino for donating one yellow boat in behalf of my name (@momblogger in twitter) . When Eton International School invited me to deliver a talk on “Parenting in the new digital age” for their 8th Leadership Awards in March, I chose the donation of a Yellow boat for the Masbate Funds for Little Kids. It is our own small way of creating more opportunities so that no child is left behind in our country.
Let me share this quote from Jay Jaboneta which reflects what they are doing:
““The great thing a little lamp can do which the big sun cannot do is to give light at night. It shows no one is superior by size but by purpose. If we cannot do great things, we can do small things in a great way. Little things make a big difference to God.”
Parents, are you sure your kids don’t hear you when you are having sex?
I came across my daughter’s forum a 12 years ago on “have you heard your parents having sex” and their thoughts on their parents having sex.
We learn a lot from our children. It never occurred to me that our kids think we have no sex life. Just because we have reached our 40’s doesn’t mean sex life is over. I found their candid answers quite helpful and amusing. Remember, these are teens’ opinions from all over the world.
The forum question was:
I have never heard my parents have sex, and I’m pretty sure they don’t anymore. What about the rest of you? Do you ever hear them?
The replies from my daughter’s online friends who were then in their teens:
1. No. hehe. But I think it’s sweet that parents still have that passion and affection for each other.
2. I think it’s horrid enough hearing them talk about it…
3. i don’t really want to imagine parents having sex. but i hope that when i reach their stage, i would still have sex. it sucks to have no sex life.
4. Oh Lordy… I have walked in on my dad and my mom…a few years later.. I walked in on my dad and my stepmom..and I’ve heard them many, many… MANY times. There should be a law or something..
5. I’ve heard them before, really shouldn’t sleep in the bedroom right beside theirs…
6. lol. well, i would be glad that they still have sex. it’s so good they’re so loving. but i really don’t want to think about it.
7. as their kids, there are some things we just don’t need to know! and it just seems perfectly fine when we do it, no?
8. we have double standards when it comes to sex.
9.Never heard them.
Never walked in on them.
Never want to.
I’d like to thank the people who made our walls as thick as they can be for having never experienced such a horrific thing. And I knew my parents were having sex because there’s a 12 year gap between me & my next sibling!
10. I walked in on my mom and dad…and I saw more than any child should. I have walked in on my mom and step-dad as well. Funny thing is…I’ve only walked in when they were making babies in the living room. I still have the scars. Oh, and I’ve heard them a few times to. So yeah, I know my parents are still “active”.
11. i hope i’ll still be living a life full of passion and romance at that age. i wouldn’t want to be all dried up like some grandmas.
12. No, my mother and father aren’t very affectionate. And my mother sleeps with my younger brother rather than my father. sheesh. I don’t want to witness the act, but they could at least treat each other like they’re actually a couple, no?
13. i don’t think my parents do it anymore either. but one time when i was younger, i swore i caught them one saturday morning because i just busted into their room to go sleep next to them.. but i think i’m blocking that memory into some dream i had or something, haha.
14. I used to hear them .. when I was little. Not anymore. On a popular radio station called K92.. well.. popular over here… They had a special called, “Grandparents Do IT To” it was halarious.
15. I ‘ve heard it. No big deal. Frankly I’m more disturbed when I don’t hear anything. My parents aren’t aliens and I like to be constantly reassured of that fact.
16. Yes I have it was embarrassing they obviously didn’t know I was home. It was horrible my mom was talking really dirty.
17. I’ve heard my dad and my stepmother but never my mom and stepfather. I was going downstairs in the middle of the night to get a magazine I had left and I over heard them and I just scurried upstairs before anything more happened that I didn’t want to see or hear. I laughed to myself though thinking… dad still has it going on… good for him! LOL
Besides, there will be pleny of payback when I bring my girlfriend/wife home for the holidays some time in the future.
18. Nope, never heard my parents doing it…. They probably do it when I’m not around.
Now it’s my turn to say my piece on this. First of all, I don’t think my kids have ever heard us having sex. Reply number 18 is more like it. Hehe. Second, the only encounter close to sex was when one of my daughters overheard her dad say to me “it’s been awhile since we ****” (that four letter word verb…shocking) . My daughter was on her way to my room at that time. I forgot my reply to my husband but I hope I wasn’t talking dirty. Not knowing she overheard her dad, I wondered why she pushed the door and tugged my hand , “Let’s now go to the salon”. Then at the salon, “mom it’s really traumatic to hear dad asking you to have sex”.
I just had to laugh “at least we are still loving to each other. Don’t you like that?”
My daughter pouted “it’s very disturbing. Sex is for young people”
I smiled “Sex is a loving expression for couples, young and old. Especially married couples. Just learn to be cautious when you approach the door to our room”
As a young child, I often wondered why my parents required us to knock at their door. Now I realized that they also had an active sex life.
Yes children (as I know I have young readers), your parents still have an active sex life. How active? It depends, of course. Just because we are reaching 40 or 50 does not exempt us from having a healthy sex life. And the older one gets the better it becomes.
I know “ewww.” *nods*
What have I learned from their replies?
1. Parents, it’s fine to espouse sex education to our kids, if you’re comfortable with the topic.
2. Sex education doesn’t mean talking about our sex life to them.
3. It’s alright to show affection to our spouse . At least our kids know we are loving to each other.
4. It’s not okay for our kids to hear us having sex. We have to learn to lock our doors or ensure thicker walls to our rooms, and other privacy measures as some kids can get shocked.
Updated May 17 , 2012– I recently appeared on Talkback with Tina Palma on Bullying. This is my updated post on Bullying in Philippine Schools and added the latest Department of Education policy on bullying.
This is a guest post by my daughter, Lauren. I’ve always wanted to tackle the topic of bullying for a long time now since I was so problematic about it during Lauren’s early years at school. The harrowing effects of bullying are best illustrated by the victim. In this case, Lauren tells her story.
I attended a private, all-girl schools from elementary up until high school and I can tell you – those were far from the best years of my life. I don’t know if it’s really in my nature to be shy and socially awkward or if my experiences in school turned me into that kind of person. One thing I do know is that a lot of the insecurities I have about myself is rooted in the fact that I got bullied a lot during my early elementary school years.
I can never forget my first bully. Her name is Kathleen and her family owned the school bus service I rode to school and back during my elementary years. We were both in grade one and for some strange reason, she took an instant dislike to me. I have no idea why – I’ve always been a quiet sort of kid who always stood out of other people’s way and I can’t remember doing or saying anything that would make her hate me. But hate me she did. She never beat me up or anything – oh no, girls are way more subtle and cruel than that. She had her own circle of friends and was somehow able to convince them to hate me as well, Going to school every morning and coming home in the late afternoon was a ritual I always dreaded. I got stuck in the worst seat, never got snacks passed my way, and pretty much had to beg the other girls to let me join their games whenever we’d get stuck in traffic.
There were many others after Kathleen – the girls who made fun of me for spending my lunch hours reading in the library, the girls who decided that I had a crush on this other girl and humiliated me about it every chance they got, even a teacher who spent an entire homeroom period picking on me because I got bored one day and felt like passing a survey in class asking if anyone else hates math as much as I do. I’m pretty sure there was more but I must have buried those memories in my subconscious somewhere. I do know that my grades went down drastically, I took to daydreaming and paying little or no attention in class, and wrote my mom a lot of notes about the “terrable days” I would have in school.
One of the many notes Lauren would write me from school.
Things didn’t get any better for me when I attended high school. I moved to a different school and made the mistake of speaking to my new classmates in English on the first day. For that reason, or whatever other reason, they decided I was weird and I spent the next four years trying and failing to fit in.
I know that my experiences as a bully victim don’t sound particularly traumatizing, but you don’t have to get beat up in the playground to develop emotional scars that stay with you for the rest of your life – especially when the damage is psychological, which is what female bullying is about. Think about it. You’re a little kid, and all you really want is to make friends with the kids you go to school with everyday. Then you find out that not only do your schoolmates reject your attempts at friendship – they also make fun of the most trivial things about you, like the way you speak. You start to wonder if maybe there’s something seriously wrong with you because nobody can seem to like you for the way you are. You start hating yourself and constantly doubting your abilities, and you find it difficult to open up to people and form deep friendships with anyone.
The sad part is that guidance counselors, teachers, and even some parents don’t think much of bullying. They pass it off as play, or maybe an early life lesson: the world can be a terrible place filled with people who will treat you with undeserved cruelty. I do understand that kids have to grow up and learn that hard lesson someday, but I think anyone under the age of ten is too young to deal with that much reality. At that age, it’s important for children to learn to accept or at least respect people for exactly who they are instead of making fun of their differences. What kind of lesson will be passed on to them if their elders shrug off bullying as something totally normal?
Notes from the Mother
No parent wants to see their child get hurt. But according to a recent US study, 77% of students are being bullied mentally, verbally, or physically by their peers. Filipino children are equally exposed to bullying, and are even more at risk since Filipino parents often mistake bullying as a painful, yet necessary, rite of passage. Children who are either bullied or bullies themselvesâ€â€are suffering from deep emotional scars. Aside from being withdrawn and depressed, victimized children are more likely to drop out of school, take up vices, and get into fights.
Thank goodness, Lauren didn’t drop out of school. The effect on her was mediocre academic performance. I could see the drastic drop starting third grade till I pulled her out of that school in Grade 6. Though intelligent, she was not motivated enough to score high in her tests until she attended college. Only then did Lauren blossom, away from the ravages of shallow high school classmates and their bullying antics.
During her elementary years, I was helpless against the bullying that victimized my sweet and gentle daughter in her School. I talked to the school’s guidance counselor and all she could tell me is that “Lauren had to learn to live with these bullies”. Moving schools was an option but where? Anti-bullying campaign in Philippine Schools was not yet in place in the mid-nineties and even today.
Good news to parents. Be aware . There is now a Department of Education policy to protect children from bullying. A Child Protection Committee (CPC) will be established in all private and public elementary and secondary schools. The committee will be composed of school officials, teachers, parents, students, and a community representative.
(If you want to guest post in my blog, drop me a note with the suggested topic)
Updated: Includes curated tweets during a discussion last April 21, 2012
““I tell people â€â€You don’t want to talk to your child about your kids’ sex education. Well therefore, your child will learn sex through billboards, through internet, through magazine, through exploitative media outlets. Good luck. I talk to my children about sex because I rather they hear it from me from anyone else”, Pia Cayetano told us in Blog Watch just before the elections.
Sex education starts when our children are young. A mother told me that she wished she had taught her pregnant 18 year old daughter about sex. Her daughter thought she would never get pregnant in her first sexual experience. Another mom expressed her frustration:
They are bombarded by sexual messages from all sides of their life, and parents have to take an even bigger role now to provide them with balance. I want my girls to see their sexuality in a healthier light than I did, without all the misconceptions and guilt that came with it. It’s hard finding a balance between wanting them to be able to enjoy their sexuality without being ashamed of it, but also accept and be accountable to the responsibility that comes with it.
““To bring up a child in the way he should go, travel that way yourself once in a while.”
– Josh Billings
I was excited despite the short notice. Russel C Patalinghog invited me to be the guest speaker at the 8th Leadership Awards of Eton International School . They were launching their new 3D based curriculum using technology from Eureka and thought I’d speak on the advantages of using new technology to help kids today learn more. He also asked me to share my insights on parenting in the new digital age.
It excited me because for the first time my talk is about parenting. Usually I am invited to talk about blogging, grief, or social media. I wanted to share my experience as a parent who provided computers in 1994 and internet use in 1995 . When the internet came to the life of my children, no one knew if it would be helpful. Some people who were ignorant of the internet often questioned me why I allowed my children to use the internet. As one of the pioneering parents to use internet, I had to rely on common sense and instincts.
Before I prepared my talk, I asked my eldest daughter Lauren on ideas as I always do whenever I write about parenting articles. My children have taught me a lot about parenting. Yes , they raised me well. My children would know if internet and new technology gave them valuable lessons in life but that is another story I will share in the future.
For now, let me share my keynote speech with some inputs from my daughters .
L was 9 years old while M was 8 years old when I had an internet connection at home. Between the 2 girls, Lauren used the internet a lot more than M. My internet service provider in 1995 was Virtual Asia. For 500 pesos a month, I had 15 internet hours. Geesh, it was terribly expensive to get wired during those days.
striking a balance for the wonders of internet accountability, self-discipline and safety
The internet at home was mainly used for email purposes as I wanted to save my precious internet hours. One summer day in 1996 , nine year old Lauren got bored and demanded to go online to search for penpals. I foresaw the need to strike a balance for the wonders of the internet with the responsibility for accountability, self-discipline, and safety. The best defense I had was to make exploring the online world a family affair.
Allow me share with you my thoughts on parenting in this new digital world before I speak on using new technology in the classroom.
Today, there are a varied array of new technologies such as the iPad. I see many kids using iPad. The question is “who needs a babysitter, now there is the iPad?”
A pediatric occupational therapist Cris Rowan, Author of Virtual Child: The Terrifying Truth About What Technology is Doing to Children, and founder of Zone’in Programs Inc outlook on child technology “use is bleak and irreversible. They’re permanently altering the formation of their brain, and it’s not in a good way.” When asked how she foresaw children adapting or evolving if they were to continue at the level of usage seen today, Rowan responded, “Well, I see them dying.”
Watch this one year old child with the iPad and a magazine. The video shows how magazines are now useless and impossible to understand, for digital natives. It shows real life clip of a 1-year old, growing among touch screens and print. And how the latter becomes irrelevant. Just watch.
The kid is restless with a magazine when it does not respond the way an iPad does. I find it disturbing because kids should be experiencing all the senses. There are health issues involved too. Your pediatrician can best explain this.
Two simple concepts: Clear limits and lead by example
I follow two parenting concepts that applies online and offline. Clear limits mean providing boundaries on our child’s activities and walking the talk on rules.
“There are many little ways to enlarge your child’s world. Love of books is the best of all.” Jacqueline Kennedy
Books need to be given to young children not iPads. They need to feel and smell the book. Sure, ebook readers provide the visuals but it does not give the tactile experience.
Call me an old-fashioned parent, but I love holding a book, leafing through the crisp pages, experiencing the vivid graphics, and inhaling that wonderful book smell. Don’t you?
Whenever I buy a new book to my toddlers, I protected their books with plastic cover. Just before reading, I smell that wonderful book smell. That experience bonded me with my children and they will never forget it.
“Children are made readers on the laps of their parents.”  Emilie Buchwald
Books are definitely a tactile experience for our children. The smell of new books always holds that promise of something new and exciting. Pass that on to your children. While I am not against iPads or other ebook readers, kids should own one when they are past 6 years old.
“We are apt to forget that children watch examples better than they listen to preaching.” – Roy L. Smith
If you need to use these digital devices to your young children, cuddle them in your arms or sit them on your lap. The best way to make technology a healthy and positive part of family life is actually to embrace it as a family activity.
I also have an issue on prolonged use of devices. For children 2 yrs and above , American Academy of Pediatrics recommend 1 to 2 hours quality screen time per day. A finding from a Kaiser study in 2010 shows youth who spend more time with media report lower grades and lower levels of personal contentment.
Rowan references “a study that indicates technology overuse is not only changing brain chemistry, but also increasing the likelihood of children developing health issues. Human connection, eye contact and dialogue are paramount. Devices are hugely limiting this important exposure, Rowan says.”
As a result, therapists and clinicians are seeing an increase in attachment disorders, depression, anxiety, bipolar, obsessive compulsive disorders, and ADHD all of which have been linked to technology overuse. “I’ve been working with kids for 25 years. I’ve never seen this,” she concludes. “This is something that’s epic. And we’re really just witnessing the tip of an iceberg.”
As a parent who didn’t know much of new technology in the mid-nineties, I’d rather children read a book, see play volleyball than spend time vegetating in front of the computer. But I thought maybe the internet can have a place at home. The school did not have internet back then. It can be perfectly safe, uplifting and wonderful parts of kids’ lives if used wisely, especially combined with other balanced and healthy daily activities.
The best way to make technology a healthy and positive part of family life “is actually to embrace it, educate yourself about it and go hands-on with new devices, apps, social networks and services wherever possible. We don’t help our kids when we judge their lives through the lens of a non-digital world. It’s important for us to understand that our kids will spend their lives in a connected world where everyone participates in communication and creation.”
2. Teach kids the skills they need to use technology wisely and well.
It’s hard to gate-keep in a world with no fences. “Parents have lost control of the flow of information to our kids who see too much, too soon. We no longer hear conversations or see what our kids create and share with others. Since we cannot cover their eyes, or shadow them everywhere, we need to teach them how to see and how to behave responsibly.”
3. Match Technology with Reading Time or Outside Time
Make a deal in the house that for every hour of media, they must also spend an hour reading or outside. This makes sure kids keep a balance between technology and other activities.Most importantly, we must consider the media and technology use in the home so it does not become automatic, but deliberate and carefully implemented.
The limits I set for my children below 16 years old : only one hour computer use/internet a day. No TV during school days. Once the girls were in college, I set them free and allowed them to set their own rules.
4. Don’t be afraid.
Parents can’t afford to be technophobic. “Our kids adopt technologies faster than we do.That means they’re often way out in front of us. This fact upsets the parent/child relationship.So get in the game. Have your kids show you how to do something if you don’t know.”
5. Pass along your values.
Family values “are things that are many times passed down from generation to generation, and they play a monumental role in how your child learns and grows. Defining this time will help your family to understand what is important and what it means when you are talking about issues such as family time, play time, and other larger issues such as spirituality and the beliefs that you wish your child to grow up with.”
Using new technology in helping your kids learn more
I am not saying my parenting concept should be followed by all. The reason I am sharing this is because I have been there using new technology when my children were way older than 6 years old.
Technology is nothing new. Through the years, technology has evolved. Watch this video on “The history of technology in education”, and at how advancements in technology have impacted teaching and learning over time.
“Film strip projectors, copy machines, cassette players, television sets, VCR’s, CD players, DVD players, projectors and myriad of other tools are all forms of technology that have aided teachers and enhanced instruction in the past. I would also agree that when used in wrong hands, these can hinder true education.”
Using new technology and computers if abused will only take the students minds away from the actual information trying to be taught, and towards how cool and awesome the new gadgets are in the classroom.
Technology in the classroom is not a new idea. “Technology has advanced, but the message is still relevant!! It shows how technology may transform delivery and create new opportunities but the process is not new. More importantly, it reinforces the need to guide the learner (with some good old note taking!). The use of new media and technology still have to be carefully thought out especially in targeting conceptual learning.”
From the old video shown in the 1950’s, it is still applicable today. New technology in the classroom should stimulate, motivate and educate with a goal in mind.
Stimulate, motivate and educate with a goal in mind
New technology in the classroom brings fun and excitement to learning, lessons are captivating and engaging, many abstract subjects become tangible for students . It can also cultivate mastery of lessons and shortened period of teaching.
How?
1. Stimulate
Students require more than simple lectures to gain knowledge. “They instead need variety. Children must be immersed in different forms of learning. This is to ensure that all types of fact absorptions can be addressed (since some individuals master information through reading while others require visuals, and some may instead need to touch their assignments). Utilize computers, debates, the arts, Kinesthetic practices and more to allow all students to understand the material. Provide variety to ensure success.”
2. Motivate
One of the major keys to motivation is the active involvement of students in their own learning. “Standing in front of them and lecturing to them (at them?) is thus a relatively poor method of teaching. It is better to get students involved in activities, group problem solving exercises, helping to decide what to do and the best way to do it, helping the teacher, working with each other, or in some other way getting physically involved in the lesson. A lesson about nature, for example, would be more effective walking outdoors than looking at pictures.”
3. Educate
When you teach kids how to stimulate their mind while having fun kids systematically seek ways to educate themselves and enjoy lessons at school and education in general.
Hesitancy and fear of technology is not new
I used to have mixed feelings about using new technology in helping my kids learn more. Knowing that Eton International school will soon use a 3D curriculum in Science and math, I wish they were around in the nineties. My two girls often struggled with Mathematics. Imagine if the Math 3D curriculum was part of their Math classes. I am sure my girls would have appreciated Math more. I will write more about their 3D Based curriculum in another blog post.
For most parents, the hesitancy and fear of new technology is not new either. Usually we think of technology as machine-like equipment. Wasn’t it at one point, implementing paper and pencils into the classroom was the new ‘technology’ craze (as opposed to the slate board). Interesting perspective, isn’t it?
You know the good thing that happened when I embraced technology? I became a blogger in 2006 and today I use social media tools to advocate social change through Blog Watch.
“Technology is ruled by two types of people: those who manage what they do not understand, and those who understand what they do not manage.” Mike Trout
Updated October 23, 2014: SC junks Cebu ‘bikini students’ plea vs. school : In an 18-page decision, the SC’s Third Division denied a petition for the issuance of a writ of habeas data filed by parents of two of the five sanctioned students.
Update March 30 RTC Branch 19 Sheriff Manuel Gimeno and process server Rey Christian Matta (left) are denied entry at the gate of St. Theresa’s College where they were supposed to serve a temporary restraining order on school officials who blocked five high school students from participating in the graduation ceremony. Gimeno and Matta were unable to serve the order. The school turned away the five students involved in the controversy of photos uploaded to Facebook showing them in bikinis and allegedly, with alcohol and cigarettes. They were not able to participate in the baccalaureate mass and the graduation rites that would have capped their high school lives. See photo of sheriff turned away and this No graduation rites
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Virtue, science, and the arts are the seeds carefully planted in the student’s mind and heart – STC motto
That’s me 38 years ago after my High School graduation. A loyalist Theresian. I walked down the aisle of the St. Theresa’s College (STC) Cebu Chapel giddy with excitement that a new life awaited me in College. Nothing extraordinary happened the weeks before this momentous occasion.
It pained me to read the story of five girls who were initially not allowed to march on graduation day. My alma mater banned the girls from attending even pre-graduation rites because they were posing in bikini and posting their pictures online. The mother of one girl petitioned the court on behalf of her daughter. On Thursday, Judge Wilfredo Navarro issued a temporary restraining order on the STC’s sanction that applied to all the 5 students. The TRO said that STC must ““treat the minors with kindness and civility befitting true graduates of a respectable institution sans any discrimination for the entire duration of the commencement exercises.”
The offensive photos in Facebook
Having been in STC, I am aware how strict the school can be. During my time, someone had to measure how short our skirts were…that we should wear pantilets under our skirt and many more. I think shorts were not even allowed to be worn under our skirt. It was not feminine. Modesty was taught early on. I recall we had to wear a chemise or sando so that our bras will not be seen through the blouse. I think most Catholic girl schools have these rules.
Despite the strict rules, I appreciate the values and knowledge that prepared me for life.
Anyway, the school officials scolded the girls for posting their photos of themselves clad in bikini at their Facebook accounts. . The students said they ““were deeply hurt and cried” after being scolded by the officials whom they accused of humiliating them with abusive language calling them ““easy, drunks and addicts.” The girls say the photos posted in their Facebook accounts were about past events held outside the school and were not offensive. The school officials say the photos were considered by the school as ““offensive to the virtues” espoused by the Catholic school.
The sanction imposed on the students was based on the provisions in the STC Handbook. I am not sure if we had the handbook back then. I do recall we couldn’t go around town with our school uniform. In the handbook, STC bars students from drinking outside the school, engaging in lewd behavior and dress in clothing that exposes underwear.
Vague standards
Student Council Alliance of the Philippines (Scap) believes that STC’s Student Handbook violates students’ rights and the Constitution.
“One of the rules stipulates that students should not be ‘posing and uploading pictures on the Internet that entail ample body exposure’ among numerous provisions that impede on the private and personal affairs of their students.” Scap said in a statement.
University of the Philippines Center for Women’s Study director Sylvia Estrada-Claudio explained that the issue is an ““institutional problem.”
““Every institution, even private religious ones, need to think disciplinary rules through so that they do not end up with institutional mechanisms that provide vague standards for discipline that lead to discriminatory and cruel interpretations,” Estrada-Claudio said.
““The vagueness of ‘ample body exposure’ leaves the interpretation up to whoever is looking at the pictures. This allows school authorities such a broad latitude that it allows for arbitrariness. In this case this arbitrariness is now the subject of controversy and like many others, I think the student’s rights have been violated.”
Jerbert Briola of Human Rights Online Philippines said the sanction is a violation of Republic Act 9262 or the Anti-Violence Against Women and Children Act ““for causing psychological violence to the student” and that the school was ““harsh” for not allowing her to march on graduation day.
The parents plan to file charges of child abuse and “grave oral defamation” against the school and school officials.
Academic freedom
Academic freedom covers standard of conduct. The concept of academic freedom includes not just standards of academic performance but also of conduct and decorum. Every educational institution has the right to prescribe proper behavioral requirements.
But these standards must be reasonable, clear and made known to the students and parents beforehand. The standards of conduct of a respected institution like my alma mater STC Cebu which has been in existence for generations were crafted at a time when there was no social media as we know it today. Who could have foreseen the impact of Facebook?
Ideas of propriety and privacy are continually evolving and it now seems that the standards prescribe by STC are outdated. It might be time to review the code of behavior required of STC students. In the meantime, maybe a less rigid penalty can be imposed.
In this age of social media, this will not be the last instance of STC students posting comments , pictures in Facebook or other social media sites. It might be time for STC Cebu to accept certain realities and adjust to them in a positive and constructive way. Why call them out with abusive language as ““easy, drunks and addicts”? Name calling will not result in constructive engagement.
After all the values instilled by STC will remain with them for life and will not be destroyed by a mere error in judgment.
To this day, I carry the values that STC instilled in me. The school’s rallying cry is ““Let your light shine. Be a blessing to those in need, especially the underprivileged.” I hope these girls will not be traumatized and will rise above this pain. After all, a Theresian is a “woman of faith and a seeker of truth with a strong sense of mission” and as such will respond “creatively to the cry of justice and fullness of life.”
Come, Theresians, and acclaim,
St. Theresa’s glorious name.
Grateful hearts their tribute bear,
Loving lips shall sing for her,
For she stands among the rest
As a leaven for the quest.
Dearest home we stand for you.
Far or near our song rings true.
And our theme fore’er shall be,
“St. Theresa, hail to thee!”
And our theme fore’er shall be,
“St. Theresa, hail to thee!”
It was one of those nights when I’d sit on my dad’s lap. I will always remember dad’s favorite line ““Study well, little girl. Education will always be with you even if I am not around.”
Education is one of the greatest investments dad could ever give us despite the limited resources. Born from a poor family, dad struggled the corporate ladder just to give us the best education he could afford. Dad may not be around now but true enough, it is education that armed me with the skills, the accumulated knowledge and values to rise up from the challenges that came my way. The words of my dad carried on to my three children. I didn’t have to prod my kids to study and educate themselves. They understood the value of education that is to prepare them even at an early age to educate themselves throughout their lives. I smile as I watch my grown-up ladies from afar, now financially independent and making life decisions with our blessings.
When we come across the word ““education,” many of us strongly associate it with schooling. If you put education in the context of your own child, what is education to you?
As a mom blogger, I get a chance to visit schools and check out their curriculum and programs. This is an opportunity to share these information to my readers and for them to discern if this is the right school for their child. I came across a few heartwarming videos about little girls manifesting good deeds to others at their tender age. It seems to be an advocacy and I admire the institution that helps parents so that the very essence of education and learning — a thinking head, a caring heart, and a serving hand comes out naturally from kids as they go through their daily lives. Take a peek at this . . .
I believe that schools and parents play an active role as partners in educating and motivating our children today to dream for a good purpose, think for a good reason, and care enough to serve others.
Parents in search for schools that value academic excellence, moral uprightness, and social responsibility should consider the development of their child’s God-given talents.
I was struck by the Giftedness Instruction for Talent (G.I.F.T) Development Program in St. Paul College Pasig. I often told my little girls back then that ““you are God’s gift to me.” I believe in honing those God-given talents and made sure my girls got the training in piano, singing, and writing even if their school did not provide for it.
The G.I.F.T Program is a curricular innovation aimed at discovering and honing the students’ talents in the various fields of arts and sciences. More than what our kids get out of school clubs, I read that G.I.F.T. is the most comprehensive talent development program integrated in basic education which features 32 specialized courses in five Talent Learning Centers.
Grade school kids enjoy tinkering with the MAC and learning during their GIFT – Digital Arts and Creative Writing classes.
Brave and aspiring young gymnasts have fun at the balance beam in their SPCP GIFT – Gymnastics class
Young kids do their warm-ups before the GIFT – Taekwondo class. As early as preschool, kids get to explore the basics of this sport.
Bringing out the giftedness in every individual heightens self-confidence and self-esteem. Self-confidence that emanates from integral formation begets good citizens which are what our country needs.
If you are searching for a school, it is important to know what you want for your child. Choose a school that complements your values. While basic education is the focus of an academically prepared, morally upright, and socially responsible child, a formal structure of talent development instruction makes learning truly relevant and functional. Investigate the school’s teaching methods if it will stimulate or hone your child’s talents, strengths, and interests. This might just be the school that matches the individual needs and interests of your child.
What type of education are you looking for your child?
I admire my husband, the father of my three beautiful children. He loved taking care of our babies whenever he had the time. See, he was a law student for our first two babies. We both shared equal time in taking care of them.  I share these heartwarming stories to my children about their dad who was very much a part of their development. Wasn’t it just yesterday that he held them in their arms?
It warmed my heart seeing my husband prance around the house with our babies cradled in his arms, rocking them to sleep in a playful, rhythmic fashion, or burping them after milk feeding. I am proud to say that even as first-time dad, he knew how to amuse our babies and, even changing diapers. He could do almost anything moms can do except breastfeeding and taking them a bath. He would have wanted to breast-feed if he could. Daddies are luckier or should I say more blessed these days. The internet is bursting with so much tips on taking care of a child. Sites like Pampers cover every aspect of taking care of babies and stages of their development. More and more daddies are involved with their children’s development because of the availability of information at the tips of their hands.
Daddies are never left behind when it comes to participation of fun activities. Pampers Philippines Facebook started a trivia month with exciting prizes such as special Daddy-baby prize (photo session) and special toys that strengthen the bond of daddy and baby. I am pretty sure, daddies can do some research at the Pampers website to get the clues for the trivia questions.
Playing trivia is a fun and educational way to know more about our babies, their development and the importance of family bonding moments. This is not just  about daddies. Learning about child development is for our babies. These are many ways that daddies can become a part of baby’s life.  It was my husband’s idea to read to our babies even if they were just months old.  My children’s lifelong love for reading is because of their dad . His ideas on child development were based  on his childhood memories but new parenting ideas came in with the shift of shared parenting.  Dads learn the essentials of child development not for his stock knowledge but to nurture a healthy child. It is one reason I ordered child development books abroad because we wanted to learn what was best for our family. Our child’s healthy development depends on our ability to provide a safe and loving environment. The children with a sound family background and who belong to a family with strong family ties are almost always happier. The importance of family life cannot be denied.
““I tell people â€â€You don’t want to talk to your child about your kids’ 
Student Council Alliance of the Philippines (Scap) believes that STC’s Student Handbook violates students’ rights and the Constitution.
