How parents can get involved with homework

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“Being a writer is like having homework every night for the rest of your life.”Lawrence Kasdan

homework_parents

““Grades matter,” I often told my little girls, “but only as a stepping stone to getting to your college choice. Those grades are yours, not mine.” I often reminded them as they poured over their books. When my eldest daughter stopped receiving honors in her third grade, I asked her, ““Do you want to be an honor student?” She folded her arms and shook her head miserably. No, she didn’t want the pressure. ““Okay, fine. Get the best grades you can achieve.” My other girl seemed more driven, wanting to achieve higher grades. That’s the reality of school. Grades are needed to bring you from one level to another. How involved was I with my children’s homework?

I made it a priority to establish good and effective study habits starting at six years old. I bought study tables during their first grade, complete with book and paper organizers. The sturdy table lasted them till their early college years when I decided to discard it when we moved to a new home.

A study routine was set between dinner and bed time. It was early dinner at 6:00p.m. and study hours from 6:30 p.m. till 9:00 p.m. I stressed that they had to finish their homework or studies within that time frame so they could sleep at exactly 9:00 p.m. Television time was definitely out of the picture except for Friday night and the weekend. The girls never complained. They knew that television time will eat up their study hours. I also believed that once used to a study routine, it will be mutually beneficial for both of us. They learn good study habits and in turn , I will not get stressed out with their homework.

During their first till third grades, monitoring their homework was necessary to set the routine. If my child faced a difficult lesson, we both tried to solve it. I felt that I shouldn’t stress out over my children’s tasks. I also believed that parent involvement need not interfere with learning. For example, even if I am good in math, I did not want to confuse my children with the teaching techniques offered in the classroom. Their school used finger math, which is alien to me. Though the school taught the parents on the proper use of finger math, it seemed quite inefficient to me.

Parent involvement in homework can turn into parent interference if parents complete tasks that the child is capable of completing alone. Independence was what I wanted them to achieve. ““Try to solve it first,” I’d suggest. Much later on, I discovered that one of my girls had a weakness in numbers during her fifth grade. I resisted the idea of getting a math tutor. She used to be so smart in math. So what is the tutor for? I asked the school guidance counselor. I learned that if a child needs help, give it. So I asked my girl, ““Do you need extra help with math?” She nodded ““I find math so difficult. I need help.” I know now that If a child is having difficulty with homework, parents should become involved by paying close attention. She practically grew up with her math tutor until her last math course in college. By the time my girls reached their intermediate and high school years, they were pretty much on their own, following the study routine set since their first grade.

Maybe my second daughter loved studying or she just had many assignments but she asked for more extension on her study hours. I gave in to her wishes because I could see she was determined to ace her subjects. Unfortunately, her dad thought otherwise and would tell her to sleep if he caught her: ““That’s enough studying. You need to sleep”.

I never believed in giving material rewards whenever a child gets a good grade. My rationale was that the achievement of a good grade is incentive enough. Of course, there was the occasional surprise food treats at home. I wanted my girls to take personal pride in their achievement and that material gifts are not the main goal for studying.

Did the good study habits help? Their high grades surely brought them to their colleges of choice. More than that, the discipline and time management established by good and effective study habits helped them hurdle challenges in life. Mommy didn’t have to always solve every little problem. I smile as I watch my grown-up ladies from afar, now financially independent and making life decisions with our blessings.
Photo source: credit here

Dreaming of cultivating shade-grown Benguet Arabica Coffee

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Shade grown coffee is coffee grown sustainably under a canopy of trees. I envision planting shade grown Benguet arabica under the canopy of Pine and Alnos trees.

It started with a cup of coffee on January 9, 2018,  just as we drove down from my husband’s hideaway somewhere in Benguet. My daughter reminded me that we needed to buy Benguet coffee at the Baguio Public market.  Sure, sure, I said.

I forgot how the coffee project idea  started but I remember dropping the question to my daughter:

“if you love coffee so much, maybe you should be a coffee farmer?” or was it “maybe you should plant coffee?”

benguet arabica coffee

This was the day we started our Benguet Arabica Coffee project idea.

All I knew about coffee is that Arabica is grown in high altitude mountains of Benguet and that my husband’s family had some vacant land. I also participated in two cupping sessions in Commune and Costa Coffee which brought back memories of my Food Technology college days.

I don’t know what popped up in my head that day. Maybe the cool climate and the pine trees gave that light bulb idea.

Or maybe walking along Luijoe’s meadow and surrounded by pine trees  gave me the inspiration. Maybe the universe  was whispering to me that morning to make use of the vacant land in my husband’s home province.

benguet arabica coffee

Before my daughter left for Europe, where she has been based the last five years, she wanted to know if we were up to coffee farming.  My husband readily agreed ,of course so I contacted my other daughter in Singapore , if she was in. Of course, she agreed.

So the dream was born…but where do we start?

benguet arabica coffee

My daughter came across “Coffee farming basics” by Chit Juan . Such an inspiring article. I knew Chit Juan because she is an advocate not only on coffee but on women entrepreneurs and social enterprise. I know she would be helpful.

I emailed her:

My 30 year old daughter, who is based in Germany is interested in coffee farming

how does one really start planting coffee? Our land is in Benguet..around 1000 meters elevation.

Do you have other resources on how to start coffee farming? An updated article?

Any information or leads will be helpful

Chit replied right away. She gave me the contact information of Professor Val Macanes of Benguet State University. Prof. Macanes otherwise known as the Professor of Coffee , replied to my text message and told me to meet him when I visit Trinidad, Benguet. My husband’s ancestral home is just near BSU. Another sign that our paths are meant to cross.

I am treading on a new journey. I know it will take three to five years to harvest the Arabica beans and that our family will need to study more about coffee farming, from bean to brew and everything in between.

So, why is the dream, cultivating shade-grown Benguet Coffee ? Well, I am going ahead of my journey . This was another discovery which I will blog in succeeding blog posts at benguetarabica.com and benguetarabica.coffee

‘Sharenting’: Are we overexposing our babies on social media?

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Our little ones are a bottomless wellspring of delight, no doubt. “A baby is a blessing. A gift from heaven above, a precious little angel to cherish and to love.”

baby-pictures

To some they are like angels sent from above to bring joy and laughter; while to others, they are promises of immortality who will carry on the family’s name. Still to some, they are perceived to give purpose and direction to an otherwise meaningless life.

Adults marvel how babies manage to sleep peacefully, hence people say “Let him sleep, for when he wakes up, he will move mountains.” And really, there nothing more adorable than a baby sleeping … well … like a baby. CLICK!

“There’s nothing really quite so sweet like tiny little baby feet.” Tiny, pink and chubby toes are so cute one can play “This little pig…” rhymes while holding these toes one by one. CLICK!

Babies are a wonder because in just a year, as they celebrate their monthly birthdays, they grow from closed-eyed and needy infants to toddlers taking one step at a time while babbling their favorite syllables. CLICK!

“Babies smile in their sleep because they are listening to the whispering of angels.” Don’t we gush when a baby smiles while sleeping and even more so when she is awake and looking into our eyes? CLICK!

From just milk to nourish them all day long, they start to be given nutritious and delicious food. They even try to feed themselves and really, parents don’t mind the mess because their babies are growing up to be independent! CLICK!

Toothless smiles are really precious but when there’s a tooth or two, they even look cuter.. CLICK!

New clothes, toys, baby gadgets and other thingamajigs from thoughtful friends and relatives? CLICK!

A baby’s “firsts” are widely celebrated amidst proud announcements that she can now babble, feed herself, walk, navigate an electronic tablet, hold the bottle independently and so on and so forth. CLICK! CLICK! CLICK! CLICK!

CLICKS. You ask why so many clicks? I say “why not?”

Taking endless photos and videos are the things people do to record, remember and share baby milestones with family and friends. Photos and videos show babies’ developmental new tricks and other developmental progress.

People with social media accounts like Facebook, Twitter and Instagram usually see these baby photos and videos posted by relatives and friends. Of course, there’s no denying that we love “oohing” and “aahing” these photos of the little ones.

On the other hand, there are times when it feels like there is over sharing and too much “exposure” for the baby.

OH MY! UMAY!

“OH MY! Your baby is soooo cute and adorable!” These we read in the comments. But if it the same baby in her blissful sleep in an album with 59 photos taken within an hour or so, doesn’t it become “UMAY!” already?

SO CUTE! SO (NOT) CUTE!

All babies are cute, right? Yes, all babies are cute but some are just way cuter and more adorable and more cuddly than others. If someone posts an album of a baby that belongs to the “others” in the previous description, what would you say? Would you comment that the baby is cute, adorable and cuddly when in fact he doesn’t measure up to your personal standard of what is cute, adorable and cuddly?

OH WOW! OA.

We usually gush when we see something really great and say “Oh wow!” This could be for a video that shows your friend’s 10-month old baby taking his first steps. This could be for a photo of a baby who loves eating mashed peas.. We usually say “OA” when the taking the first steps videos are posted one after the other or like previously written, 50+ (or even more!) photos of the baby eating the mashed peas.

To post or not to post. This is one dilemma that parents need to consider when posting on their Social Media accounts. Below are a few reminders on what to post or what not to post about babies:

To post (but not the same photos in no more than 5-10 pictures):
• Baby’s milestones
• Baby’s firsts
• Baby’s monthly pre-birthday celebrations

Not to post:
• Babies without clothes on
• Babies taking a bath
• Babies with other parents’ children
• Baby’s geotagged daycare center place
• Photos with information about the baby
• Photos of baby while unwell

If you parents, however, feel that you need to share these photos and videos on your Social Media accounts, there is no stopping you.

Here are guidelines which may help you ensure you do not endanger the baby’s safety and privacy from exposure to social media:

1. Tinker with the privacy settings of the Social Media accounts to make sure photos are not shared indiscriminately.
2. Turn off geotagged photos which show locations.
3. Only share with people you really know.
4. Ask yourself if you want people you do not really know see the photos you are sharing.
5. Ask yourself if you are willing to take that risk to have your baby’s photos used in other sites without your knowledge and permission.
6. If still you want to share, put watermark on the photo or least blur the baby’s face a bit.
We should value our privacy now more than ever especially since social media accounts are vulnerable to having its contents used by people of bad intent. This has happened and is happening. At this very moment, who knows that photos of your little ones have already been posted elsewhere?

 

written by Julie Fuertes-Custodio, as originally published at the Philippines Online Chronicles

 

Six things we can learn from children

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“A child can teach an adult three things: to be happy for no reason, to always be busy with something, and to know how to demand with all his might that which he desires.” – Paulo Coelho

learn from children

Children may not have a lot of experience and knowledge about the world but they have ideal qualities that many adults have long forgotten. Kids can help remind us of little things that matter most. They can give us a better perspective of life. Sometimes adults get lost in the sea of responsibilities that they forget how to open themselves to the sense of wonder and exploration. If you think about it, children are gurus of true happiness.

The journey to adulthood may have made us forget some of the essential things in life but it’s not too late. We can still relearn and embrace the life lessons from childhood.

1. That another day is a chance to start anew

Adults like to carry around negative emotions like excess baggage. When things go wrong, adults have a tendency to get mad, lay blame and hold grudges.

Children find it easy to let go and face the next day with optimism. When you are young, each day is like a fresh start. They open their doors to new opportunities and exciting experiences. Children leave past disappointments and failures behind and try again without doubt and hesitation.

Kids may fall several times but they always manage to get back up on their feet. When adults are bombarded with challenges, they tend to focus on the number of failures. The harder it is to recover, the more they lose sight of their goals.

Children can teach us to hang on and just keep on trying. Success is never far behind when you give your best. Patience and perseverance are keys to realizing your visions.

2. Pay attention to the little things in life

We are often so absorbed with our work and responsibilities at home that we neglect the beauty around us. Problems and worries of everyday life can easily weigh us down. Sometimes adults would rather bury themselves in their work so that they could temporarily forget their troubles.

Time can restrain us. Many adults are always in a hurry to beat deadlines and pay bills on a regular basis. We are not aware that life is passing us by.

Children can teach us to stop and smell the roses. Take time to slow down and appreciate the beauty that is all around us. Embracing the richness of life can help calm the mind and the senses. Finding peace can help us focus better. Sometimes a break is just what we need to boost our energy and concentration.

3. To face each day with courage and confidence

The young welcome each day with confidence and courage which allows them to enjoy life better than adults. Children are not afraid of taking risks. Their innocence makes them more open to new experiences.

As we grow older, fear becomes a result of what we have learned in the past. For instance, an adult knows better than to touch a burning candle because he knows he will get burned. In this context, fear prevents one from getting hurt.

Adults are often ruled by different fears. Many grown-ups are afraid of the unknown, being ridiculed, being rejected, being judged, and the uncertainty of what might happen next.

Balance is important in life. It’s alright to use past experiences to guide us in making better judgment but fear should not limit us from trying new things.

People can enjoy life more by setting aside fears of failure. How will we know unless we try?

4. Take time out and have fun

Play is not just for children. According to Help.org, play is a way to “fuel your imagination, creativity, problem-solving abilities, and emotional well-being.”

Many of us become slaves to our duties, commitments and responsibilities at the workplace and at home. We end up being so overwhelmed with tasks that we barely have time to relax and have fun. As we grow older, we dismiss the essence of play.

In this modern world, adults’ idea of fun is often watching movie marathons at home, engaging in online games, and browsing social media sites. Many of us have forgotten about energetic and carefree play that  gives us renewed vigor.

Find time away from your modern, serious and hectic lives to have pure fun. It can be as simple as riding your bike with your spouse, friend or child. How about blowing bubbles in the air or running around the lawn? Get a chalk and draw on the pavement. Better yet, use it to draw a good old “piko” (hopscotch) pattern on the ground and play with the whole family. Fly a kite, catch a Frisbee, play fetch with your dog, chase butterflies, and so on.

Keep in mind that play can relieve stress, stimulate the mind, inspire creativity, and improve relationships.

5. Learn to give without expecting anything in return

Most adults are open to helping, giving or sharing with others but they often expect something in return. In the journey of life, many of us have learned that a favor merits a return favor; perhaps not immediately but later on.

Children can show us how good it feels to give unconditionally. The young ones give without any hidden motives. Adults can re-discover how to give without expecting to get something out of it. The happiness of showing kindness and generosity to others can be its own reward.

Let kids remind us of how wonderful it is to extend a helping hand without strings attached. Meaningful contributions make both giving and receiving a heartwarming experience.

6. Open your heart to forgiveness

Children are the epitome of forgiving and forgetting. One minute kids can be fighting over a toy and the next minute, they are giving each other a tight hug.

Adults find it harder to forgive. Pride often gets in the way of reconciliation. When adults get hurt, they often become resentful. They carry a grudge that amplifies the pain.

Nobody is perfect. We all make mistakes. When we forgive someone, we give that person another chance. The young can teach us that forgiveness can free us of further pain.

 

by Ma. Rachel Yapchiongco , as originally posted at the Philippine Online Chronicles

 

Photo c/o Pixabay. Public domain.

On International Women’s day, how will you #PressforProgress ?

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Individually, we’re one drop but together we’re an ocean. We need to commit to a “gender parity mindset” through progressive action. With the global activism for women’s equality fuelled by movements like #MeToo, #TimesUp and more – there is a strong global momentum striving for gender parity. So let’s all collaborate to accelerate gender parity, so our collective action powers equality worldwide.

Select the one area that you commit to specifically concentrate on to press for progress for gender parity in your own sphere of influence. I will continue to press for progress and challenge stereotypes and bias:

  • question assumptions about women
  • challenge statements that limit women
  • always use inclusive language
  • work to remove barriers to women’s progress
  • buy from retailers who position women in positive ways

womens day

I’ve just taken action to help accelerate gender parity.

womens day

My concern is the blatant display of disrespect, disregard, and utter lack of awareness and understanding of human rights, moreso those of women, by no less than the President and other powerful men in government. What is enraging is that instead of celebrating the role of women in leadership positions and diverse voices that give meaning to a democracy, we are slowly witnessing women being shamed, their voices being silenced, and the culture of toxic masculinity permeating the very institutions that should demonstrate—and from which we should demand—the utmost respect for women and every individual.

“In today’s digital world we can’t afford to leave anyone behind. We need to press for progress for the better of each one of us” says Julie_Teigland. Let’s do this.

Make a difference, think globally and act locally! Make everyday International Women’s Day. Do your bit to ensure that the future for our girls is bright, equal, safe and rewarding. International Women’s Day is not country, group or organisation specific. This  day belongs to all groups collectively everywhere. So together, let’s all Press for Progress.

Divorce in the Philippines?

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(I first wrote divorce in the Philippines , seven years ago. This is updated in the light of the divorce bill being deliberated at the Plenary in the coming weeks)

divorce philippines

Believe it or not! The Philippines is now the only country without Divorce that has not legalized divorce. There is Vatican but it is not really a country.

In 2011, Gabriela refiled a controversial bill to legalize divorce in the country. Known as House Bill No. 1799 (An Act Introducing Divorce in the Philippines), which listed down five grounds for the filing of a petition for divorce. This year, a consolidated  bill  seeking to allow divorce in the Philippines has hurdled the House committee level and may be up for deliberation at the plenary in a week. The proposed  bill titled “An Act Instituting Divorce and Absolute Dissolution of Marriage in the Philippines”, substituted House Bills 116, 1062, 2380 and 6027.

Spouses have the option to file for an absolute divorce, a legal separation, or annulment of marriage under the proposed bill. Section 3 paragraph 2 of the bill states that the government should assure that the divorce shall be inexpensive and its process, efficient.

The grounds for absolute divorce under Section 5 of the bill are limited to the following:

  1. Physical violence or grossly abusive conduct directed against the petitioner, a common child or a child of the petitioner;
  2. Physical violence or moral pressure to compel the petitioner to change religious or political affiliation;
  3. Attempt of respondent to corrupt or induce the petitioner, a common child or child of petitioner to engage in prostitution;
  4. Imprisonment of respondent for more than six years, even if pardoned;
  5. Drug addiction or habitual alcoholism or chronic gambling on the part of respondent;
  6. Respondent’s homosexuality
  7. Bigamous marriage contracted by respondent
  8. Marital infidelity or perversion or having a child with another person other than spouse during marriage, except upon mutual agreement;
  9. Attempt against the life of the petitioner, common child or child of petitioner
  10. Abandonment by petitioner or by respondent without justifiable cause for more than one year.

My stand on divorce

I am for divorce. Let me elaborate.

I wrote about annulment in the Philippines 12 years ago. The comments from readers exposed me to the sad reality of abusive spouses. I understood the reasons of failed marriages of close friends and relatives but it was only in my blog and through emails, that I understood the abusive relationships in some marriages. My heart reaches out to women crying out for help, one of which told me:

Being trapped for 18 years (1992-present) as single parent but status married, I hate our laws, as a woman, as a wife, having been abused. I was a battered wife for four years until i decided to run away for my life. My home is not safe anymore, my basic right to life was violated for four years (1988-1992) by someone supposed to protect me. Annulment law is a milking cow for lawyers, a law only for the elite, a privilege to those who can afford, a law for sale, another human rights violation. For those battered women who cant afford, the law shouts for you to wait for death, no escape, we are doomed.
Being battered and unprotected is one thing I hate being born Filipina. I was already scammed and I cannot even appeal cause 15 days has lapsed. Money cannot be made in 15 days for a single parent with two children whose education is priority. Decision notice did not even warn me I have to beat 15 days.

It is for this reason that the bill was filed, “for women in abusive marital relationships, the need for a divorce law is real. It is high time that we give Filipino couples, especially the women, this option,” said Gabriela Representatives Luzviminda Ilagan and Emerenciana De Jesus in the bill’s explanatory note.

An abusive relationship is one reason why I support the divorce bill.

The abuse can be verbal, physical or psychological. One in five women experienced some form of physical violence .

In 2013, the government’s National Statistics Office carried out its latest National Demographic and Health Survey. It found that one in five women aged between 15 and 49 had experienced some form of physical violence, and one in four emotional, physical, or sexual violence from their husbands. Of course, these statistics are most likely a fraction of what is actually happening, since only 30 percent of women said they sought assistance after suffering abuse, falling to just 4 percent when pregnant. But there does appear to be an upwards trend of reporting crime to the police; from 1997 to 2013, the number of cases of violence against women reported rose by more than 500 percent. Granted, these cut across economic status, but statistics continually show that the impacts of a failed marriage or a violent spouse, and the inability to properly separate from such a relationship, often fall harder on poorer women.

Do you think the spouse who inflict these abuse ever change? Most never do and the only way for abusive spouses to change is to undergo therapy.

A divorced mother from the USA told me that “the culture and values of a society have to change. There has to be equal respect and rights given to men and women. This has to be more important than “protecting the sanctity of marriage”. As fas as I am concerned, if a partner (man OR woman) abuses the other, THE SANCTITY OF THEIR MARRIAGE HAVE ALREADY BEEN VIOLATED.”

divorce philippines

Divorce Law is a start

If the divorce bill is passed, well and good but it does not stop there.

Instituting divorce law is a start. Changes need to start within the family system and our culture.

1. As parents, we teach our children not by words but with our actions. Abusive spouses will pass on their habits to their children when they witness physical, sexual, economic, verbal or psychological violence. As parents, our children have to know that Violence against women in any form is a crime.

2. Women have to change – they have to be brave enough to leave their husbands and make it in on their own, believe in their own strengths and ability to live and support themselves and their children.

3. Men have to change. If a man feels entitled to treat his wife and children as property or human beings who should be under his control, then he needs to be thrown in jail if he acts accordingly.

4. Most importantly, we all have to change, women trapped in these relationships are isolated – some physically, financially, socially, others just emotionally (that is why there are accomplished career women who are in these relationships).

*number 2-4 was shared to me by a divorced Filipino in the USA

Marriage will not be taken lightly if there is a divorce law. The law is there to help spouses trapped in abusive relationships and when the marriage is beyond repair. What happens if your child witness the abusive spouse hitting their parent? The child will believe it is alright to be stuck in a marriage where abuse is alright. The child in turn, will carry this on in their future relationships.

I believe my friend when she said that “the most important persons in this situation are the children. In any decision you make, always choose the one that is best for them.”

Voice out your opinions on the Divorce Bill.

The good news is this is the first time a Divorce Bill reaches House Plenary for deliberation.

If you feel that the divorce bill is important to you, show your support for it. If you are against it, then voice your opinion as well.  Think about the benefits and consequences carefully. Think about how you, someone you know, or even how your own children will be affected by the bill if it becomes law.

Click the thumbnails below

“An Act Providing for Absolute Divorce and Dissolution of Marriage” (Images via https://twitter.com/VinceNonatoINQ )

Photo: from localwin.com and “I can has divorce?” by Nick Schweitzer, c/o Flickr. Some Rights Reserved

Never too early to teach kids about the value of setting goals

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“I want to be an architect. I want to build giant buildings that can touch the clouds,” Jonathan, a 4 year old boy told his mom about his ambition. Jessica encourages her son to dream about the future.

Setting age-appropriate and short term goals

It is never too early to teach kids about the value of setting goals and working their way towards achieving them. Goal setting can help provide children with a promising future.

goal-setting

It’s advisable to start young kids with short term goals that may take only a few days until a week to accomplish. This is a good way for kids to experience successful tasks before aspiring for more challenging and long-term goals.

Parents can help their children reach their full potential by encouraging them to set age-appropriate goals. Start them early to help them work their way towards their objectives. A goal could be as simple as finishing homework, completing a school project, memorizing a poem, practicing dance steps, or studying for a quiz.

Stephanie, 9 years old set a goal to finish a 200-jigsaw puzzle all by herself in a span of few days. Stephanie’s goal may sound trivial for an adult, but at her age, it’s a concrete goal that promotes critical thinking, independence, patience, and determination.

Never underestimate a child’s goal. Small goals can help shape a young one’s character. Every little goal promotes stages of development. It is the role of parents to be aware of their children’s hopes and dreams and teach them how to reach for their goals.

Kids need encouragement no matter how simple their goal is to inspire them to fulfill their objectives. It provides them a sense of purpose and direction. Just like adults, hopes and aspirations bring meaning to a young one’s life. It gives them something to look forward to. Little triumphs become stepping stone for kids to set new and more challenging goals.

When Stephanie finished her 200-jigsaw puzzle on her own, she felt a sense of joy and pride. Her parents showed her how proud they were of her accomplishment by having the puzzle framed. They displayed the puzzle on the living room wall for everyone to see. Stephanie’s mom and dad also rewarded their daughter by bringing her to Puzzle Mansion in Tagaytay to see the grand collection of jigsaw puzzles. Stephanie is excited to build her next jigsaw puzzle.

Children can benefit from fun goals. Little goals that kids enjoy doing can help them aspire for bigger goals in the future. Achieving a small goal can give a child a boost of confidence and energy.

we are all god's children papal visit

Freedom to choose

Parents always have the best interest of their children at heart but as much as you want your child to become successful in life, it’s also important to give them the freedom to choose their path.

Give kids the opportunity to create their own goals and decide what they want to achieve. Parents can guide their children but they should refrain from dictating what they want their kids to do.

Celso was a member of the university basketball team when he was in college. When his son was two years old, he bought him his first basketball. At age three, he bought his son a mini adjustable basketball hoop to develop his motor skills and coordination. Celso hoped that introducing his son to basketball at an early stage would encourage him to follow his footsteps. Despite Celso’s efforts, his son didn’t exhibit passion for basketball as he grew older. At age 7, his son expressed love for music and not sports. His son begged him to enroll him in guitar lessons. Even though Celso was disappointed deep inside, he did not show it. The last thing he wanted to do was discourage his child from what he loves. He did not push his son to follow the path that he wants. Celso supported his son’s love for music by buying him a guitar and enrolling him in guitar lessons. His son is now 12 years old and a member of the school band. Celso is very proud of his young man.

Children who experience freedom to set their own little goals can gain sense of purpose. This kind of freedom can contribute to self-confidence and self-belief. Kids who are guided with goals can enhance decision making and problem solving skills. It also motivates them to work harder to achieve success.

Laying out step by step actions

Kids who have personal goals are likely to do better in life than those who don’t know how to make plans. When you introduce your children to the significance of goal setting, make sure that you also teach them how to reach their goals. Support your child’s dreams by guiding them in planning their course of action.

For example, if your child’s goal is to qualify for the school’s swimming team for the next school year, you can help your child enhance his swimming skills by giving him an opportunity to practice swimming regularly. It’s great if you have your own pool at home or if there’s a nearby pool in your village that he can use. You can also choose to enroll him in advance swimming lessons after school or during weekends. Part of the action steps is investing time and effort to regularly perform swimming drills in order to improve stamina and swimming techniques. When your child is determined to reach his goal, he will work hard to swim better and faster in order to qualify for the team next school year. Your child may also have to learn to make certain sacrifices to achieve his goal. For instance, he may not be able to go to the mall during weekends because he needs to attend swimming lessons. Part of goal setting is learning to set priorities even at a young age.

Learning from mistakes

The road to success is not always smooth. Sometimes there are bumps or roadblocks along the way. Explain to your child that challenges are part of the learning process. It may take a few tries before your child can achieve his/her objectives. Tell your child that it’s normal to make mistakes along the way. The important thing to remember is not to give up. Teach your child how to learn from his/her mistakes and use his/her experiences to do better in the future.

Acknowledging effort

Make it a point to acknowledge your children’s efforts in goal setting and working their way towards achieving their objectives. Applaud their dedication and commitment to their goals, no matter how small it is.

Compliment your child for a job well done. Boost his confidence with praises such as, “I’m proud of you for doing your best. Keep it up!” or “I’m amazed by how focused you are in reaching your goal.”

 

Photo c/o Flickr. Some rights reserved.
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by Ma. Rachel Yapchiongco as originally published at Goal-setting for kids: Teaching them early

Spinal Care Chiropractic uses the Gonstead technique

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Consult your family doctor if chiropractic care is needed  under the supervision of a chiropractor or Spinal Care Chiropractic. 

spinal care chiropractic

I recently attended an event at the Spinal Care Chiropratic to learn more about chiropractic care. I have always wanted to get the services of a chiropractor because I am scoliotic but I am also aware that chiropractic is a form of alternative medicine.  Not all doctors are supportive of alternative medicine so it is my intention to research on the best chiropractic care.

There are many misconceptions of what a chiropractor is. For one, the “manghihilot” is not the same as a chiropractor. Secondly, chiropractic care or being under the supervision of a chiropractor is not mainly for back and spinal problems.

spinal care chiropractic

Unknown to many, optimizing one’s overall health and wellbeing is something obtainable by chiropractic care. Did you know that one’s spine  affects everything regarding sickness and disease? It is not a specific treatment for any disease or condition but instead, chiropractic care focuses on the inherent ability of the human body to heal itself.

spinal care chiropractic

I am not a medical professional but I believe that the curvature of the spine like my scoliosis have an effect on my body . Perhaps the pain in my lower back after walking is one?

spinal care chiropractic

Chiropractic care has become the 3rd largest healthcare profession and the number one alternative healthcare approach in the world. Its benefit extends beyond managing back issues and is more about the important practice to regularly maintain a healthy lifestyle.

My visit to the Spinal Care Chiropractic  opened my eyes to the Gonstead Technique– which claims to be one of the safest and most effective in the world. Less than 1% of chiropractors worldwide specialize in Gonstead due to its complexity. In the Philippines, the only Gonstead practitioner is Spinal Care Chiropractic’s Dr. Daniel Su. A Taiwan-born Australian, Dr. Su graduated with a Bachelor of Chiropractic Science Degree. He earned his Masters in Chiropractic from Macquarie University in Sydney and has also completed the 3-module Gonstead Ambassador Program.

spinal care chiropractic

The only Gonstead practitioner in the Philippines is Spinal Care Chiropractic’s Dr. Daniel Su.

Check how Dr. Su helped his 19-year old patient suffering from extreme kyphosis by using Gonstead Chiropractic.

Gonstead Technique 

The Gonstead technique is conducted with a thorough analysis of the whole spine to detect the presence of spinal misalignments or subluxations. They will even check your walk or gait.   A customized treatment plan is then created for patients with the goal to correct these subluxations, which will assist and restore the body’s natural healing process.

spinal care chiropractic

The Gonstead Chiropractor goes beyond what many chiropractors consider a spinal assessment by conducting a thorough analysis of your spine using five criteria to detect the presence of the vertebral subluxation complex.

Visualization — Visualization is a way to cross reference all the other findings. Your chiropractor is an expert in looking for subtle changes in your posture and movement which could indicate any problems.

Instrumentation — The instrument of choice in the Gonstead System is the Nervoscope. The Nervoscope detects uneven distributions of heat along the spine which can be indicative of inflammation and nerve pressure. This instrument is guided down the length of your back and feels like two fingers gliding down each side of your spine.

spinal care chiropractic

the Nervoscope detects uneven distributions of heat along the spine which can be indicative of inflammation and nerve pressure.

Static Palpation — This is simply the process of feeling (or palpating) your spine in a stationary (or static) position. Your chiropractor will feel for the presence of swelling (or edema), tenderness and any abnormal texture or tightness in the muscles and other tissues of your back.

Motion Palpation — This process involves feeling the spine while moving and bending it at various angles. This enables the chiropractor to determine how easily or difficult each segment in your spine moves in different directions.

X-Ray Analysis — X-ray films enable your doctor to visualize the entire structure of your spine. This is helpful in evaluating posture, joint and disc integrity, vertebral misalignments and ruling out any pathologies, or recent fractures that may be present or contributing to the patient’s condition. These full-spine radiographs are taken in the standing, weight-bearing position to fully substantiate the examination findings.

The ability to recognize and correct these misalignments forms an integral part of the Gonstead Concept. For example: When the lower portion of the spinal column has misaligned vertebra, the body tries to keep itself and its skeleton upright and straight. Often it compensates by causing a vertebra above to become misaligned. This is the body’s way of attempting to re-establish the normal perpendicular position of the body.

The Gonstead technique also addresses other areas such as the hip, shoulder, elbow, wrist, knee and foot. It can even delve into cases related to pregnancy and childbirth, children’s development, improving posture, scoliosis and increasing mobility. It can likewise help a patient deal with sleeping disorders, reducing the occurrence of common colds and cough, and strengthening one’s immune system.

spinal care chiropractic

Spinal Care’s results-focused wellness approach also covers managing stress and will extend its services with sound advice on living a healthy lifestyle, proper diet and nutrition.

spinal care chiropractic

It is the goal of a Gonstead doctor to restore and maintain optimal health by locating and correcting any interference to the nervous system caused by vertebral subluxation.

Subluxation Degeneration

I plan to talk to my doctor soon and seek advise if I need chiropractic care for my back.

 

Check with your doctor before you visit the Spinal Care Chiropractic . Chiropractic care is alternative medicine and may not be endorsed by some doctors.

Spinal Care Chiropractic is located at 9th floor of Menarco Tower 32nd Street, Bonifacio Global City, Taguig. For inquiries, please call 816.3982, 0917 842.6160 or email info@spinalcareph.com. You may also visit www.spinalcareph.com and Spinal Care Chiropractic on Facebook.

 

On World Cancer day, we can, I can make a difference in the fight vs cancer

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World Cancer Day gives us a chance to reflect on what we can do, make a pledge and take action.


No matter who you are – a cancer survivor, a co-worker, a carer, a friend, or a student – and no matter what you choose to do, ‘We can. I can.’ make a difference in the fight against cancer.

Here are the facts about cancer:

  • Cancer is a disease that knows no boundaries and has, or will, affect us all either directly or indirectly during our lifetime.
  • Actions taken by every person, organisation and government will help reduce the burden of cancer to achieve the goal of a 25% reduction in premature deaths from NCDs by 2025.
  • Cancer is a leading cause of death worldwide, responsible for 8.8 million deaths per year. However, we know that more than one third of these deaths are preventable, and if detected early enough, many cancers are curable.
  • Until cancer awareness is improved globally and actions are taken to prevent and treat the disease, millions of people around the world will die unnecessarily every year.
  • We must act now because the global cancer epidemic is enormous and set to rise. It is predicted to increase from 14.1 million in 2012 to 19.3 million cases per year in 2025.

Here is what we can and I can do.

  1. Early detection saves lives. Be aware on Childhood cancer warning signs
world cancer day

Image via worldcancerday.org

Diagnosing cancer isn’t always easy – not all cancers show early signs and symptoms and other warning signs can appear quite late when the cancer is advanced. However, increasing awareness of signs and symptoms and the importance of timely treatment has been shown to improve survival from cancer. This is because finding cancer early almost always makes it easier to treat or even cure.

2. Everyone can take steps to reduce their risk of cancer by choosing healthy options including quitting smoking, keeping physically active and choosing healthy food and drinks.

Reducing exposure to ultraviolet (UV) radiation from the sun and other sources, such as solariums, also greatly reduces the risk of many skin cancers.

Everyone can make healthy lifestyle choices to reduce their risk of cancer.

“We must all work together if we are to free the world from the pain and suffering of cancer. The American Cancer Society has made significant contributions to the remarkable progress we’ve seen in the U.S. In addition, as a global leader, we continue to share our expertise in cancer prevention and treatment to help save more lives. On this World Cancer Day, we can make a difference for millions of people everywhere by committing to actions that will reduce the global threat of the disease.”
Gary Reedy, CEO American Cancer Society

Getting out of my comfort zone

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“We are so accustomed to the comforts of “I cannot”, “I do not want to” and “it is too difficult” that we forget to realize when we stop doing things for ourselves and expect others to dance around us, we are not achieving greatness. We have made ourselves weak.” Pandora Poikilos, Excuse Me, My Brains Have Stepped Out

When I think of challenges and opportunities, I take a trip down memory lane to that time when I was a young girl trying to establish a career.

I could have stuck with my Food Technologist position because it is my bacherlor’s degree. At twenty one years old, I was a Production and Quality Control Supervisor for a candy manufacturer, which you know today as MENTOS. I found myself struggling with Tagalog and finally learning how to speak it ( though broken) in order to communicate with the workers. The daily sampling of all the sweet and chewy goodies and meeting production schedules felt like clockwork. Doing the same thing, day in and day out, in my white lab gown was not challenging enough. BORING! I felt my mind needed to learn something new which I can apply to my job. I wanted to do something different from Food Technology.

A Masters degree in Business Administration was the in-thing among my peers. Will a Food Technologist make it? Though I had a few units in Business and Accounting, I felt it was not enough. “Think out of the box” was what I needed to come up with the more “creative” solutions for case studies. Armed with new skills and knowledge, I was ready for a different career path.

researcher for SME financing

In 1981, I shifted careers. I was drawn to developmental work . Working as a researcher/consultant for UP Institute for Small Scale Industries (UP ISSI) and Small Enterprise Research Development Foundation (SERDEF) was a dream job because I can use my knowledge to help the country’s economy. During those days, I only had pencil and yellow pad to write my research and a typist for drafts and the final copy. I literally cut my draft and pasted onto a new sheet of paper during revisions.

One project that made me cry was this World Bank grant on a “Study on possible widening of the scope of Planter’s Bank Financing Activities for Small and Medium Scale Enterprises” in 1984. The WB was not happy with the study of the former Project Manager and I was tasked to revise it.

Yes, I knew how to research but I had zero knowledge about financial institutions. I called up my father who is a financial expert in Cebu and ranted that I had no idea what I was supposed to write. Just like any helpful father, he gave me articles or clippings about financial institutions. Daddy was my “internet” or source of information outside the library. Pouring over volumes of secondary data and analyzing the primary data, I finished the report. I re-wrote everything . With computers and the ease of printing these days, I cannot imagine how I came out with this study that consisted of so many pages.

research paper on financing for SMEs

Looking at my life 33 years ago reminds me that even at my golden age, I can move on to a new chapter. I kept this study as a trophy for myself, that I must always challenge myself. The only way to create change is by leaving your comfort zone. The only way for me to change my life and to change them for good is to relocate my comfort zone.

You can do it too. How?

You can change your life with repeated, specific action — the trick is actually going through with it all. Change your habits and sooner than you think you’ll find yourself within a new comfort zone — a comfort zone so far from your original comfort zone that you may have trouble understanding how it is that you were able to accomplish so much. And then you will have nothing but you and your inner drill sergeant to thank. Each of us has the power to change our lives. Most of us, however, rather remain comfortable.

I would have never attained a fraction of my potential if I stuck it out being safe and comfortable. As I embark on a new chapter of my life as a “Content Strategist” , I tell myself “you can make it happen.”

What have you done to go out of your comfort zone?