Menopausal Pregnancy

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No I’m not pregnant. I thought I was. The past few weeks was so stressful. My husband worried over the state of my health. Imagine, if I had blogged “I’m 49 and I’m pregnant“. Would I cry or laugh if that happened? When I confided my fears to my daughter “I don’t want to hear it. It’s disgusting” It must seem embarassing to her if we conceived a baby at our age. Heck, some of my high school classmates are grandmothers already. Not that I want to be a grandma. Five years ago, I thought I wanted to have another baby. My obstetrician-gynecologist did a thorough physical checkup and declared that my eggs were that of a 39 year old woman. The hitch then was my diabetes. My husband and I decided not to pursue another child.

I have been injecting insulin in lieu of oral meds for the past weeks as precaution and just finishing the rest of the stock. It’s not a far-fetched idea to be pregnant at my age. My sister in law mentioned that her sister bore a healthy girl at the ripe old age of 51. My other sister in law is a menopausal baby. Her mom was 46 years old then. I know two other friends who bore their child when they were in their mid-forties. It’s possible but very risky. Dozens of babies are being born every year to women over the age of 50 who have had in vitro fertilization (IVF) in the UK . I don’t think anyone has tried that here in the Philippines. I won’t take my chances. There is an increased risk of heart attack, stroke and hemorrhaging and, because of the additional pressure placed on our older bodies, we are more susceptible to high blood pressure, pre-eclampsia and diabetes. Much as I love babies, I will just wait for my grandchildren to arrive in the far future (erm not anytime soon).

Child Abuse Advocacy

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shoemart59mini.jpgI am not surprised that after the mashing incident in Greenbelt 3, a smiliar incident will happen again. A friend in her mid twenties emailed me about a child abuse incident in Shoemart (SM) Baguio. The father, Angelico Mercader is the Head of Communications at the Office of the Secretary in the Department of Education and a father of three young children. He is advocating against child abuse after that incident:

I’d like to share an incident which happened last Saturday, April 29, 2006 in Baguio City where my two sons, age 6 and 8, were sexually harassed at SM Baguio.

FRISKING MY KIDS’ PRIVATE PARTS – NOT FUNNY!

I went to SM Baguio with my two sons and 4 year-old daughter on Saturday afternoon. At the entrance, there was this routine baggage inspection – one line for males and another for females. Upon our entrance, the guard inspected my bag and frisked me. As I was holding
my little girl, my two sons were following right behind me.

After I was inspected, I saw the guard frisking my sons from the waist down to their private parts, one after the other. I freaked out when I saw what the guard did, as I also saw him smiling while my two sons were looking at me helplessly. I reprimanded him and said that he had
just sexually harassed my children. Instead of apologizing, he argued that he was only joking and that he wasn’t gay and that my children were boys anyway.

The complete email can also be found here and here. Incidentally, the owners of SM and the security agency, Star Force Security, are one and the same.

The incident angers me because of a similar attitude I got from a fellow mother-chaperone in one of my girls’ choir tour in Canada. Another mom whispered to me that one of our kids, a 6 year old girl (let’s call her Leila) fondled the private parts of her Filipino-Canadian host’ 8 year old child. I was appalled and immediately reported it to the mother-chaperone of Leila. I was even more shocked at her reply:

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The Coños and their Taglish

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My friend Emma showed me the article of her beloved son, Ariel Llanto who passed away last December, 9 2005. Ariel had hepatosplenic gamma delta T-cell lymphoma, a rare and particularly aggressive disease and lived barely one month after the diagnosis. His April 27 article on the Inquirer’s Young Blood was about Leaving Manila. As a Cebuana who studied college in Manila during the mid seventies, Ariel ‘s observations was evident during my time.

I started to uncover social nuances at school. I have vivid memories of roaming around the campus, trawling for evidence of the disparities, in particular, between the way Cebuanos and Manileños spoke. I winced at the sound of the Tagalog accent and words finding their way to English statements. Many girls — and, to my horror, guys — spoke like Kris Aquino.

An amusing breed, known as ““coños,” acted as if they didn’t know how to speak straight Tagalog, opting to communicate in a mangled mish-mash of Tagalog and English (““Taglish”).

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Beware abusive men

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“You provoked me”, the wife-beater smugly said.

“It is still no reason to hit me” protested the wife.

This is a common conversation that occurs between the wife beater and the [tag]abused woman[/tag]. Wife beaters have a specific pattern that can be seen early in a relationship.

Abusive men often are highly romantic, sweet and protective early in their relationships. They lavish their women gifts during courtship. For them, women are trophies to be won over and objects to possess, and not people to enter equal partnerships with.

This cycle of abuse can be broken if women know how to empower themselves. The new law, Republic Act (RA) 9262 ““Anti-Violence Against Women and Children is not against men. It is against men who treat their women as property.

The following is a true story of how Republic Act (RA) 9262 is working for a battered wife, a close friend who narrated the following events to me (names and certain situations changed):

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Manila Traffic Sights

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junkIt’s common knowledge that driving around in Manila is stressful. Usually I play my CD of religious songs to keep me sane. I discovered that if I paid close attention to the traffic sights in Manila, it distracts me and even keeps me amused. Taking pictures added to the fun. So yesterday I took some pics using my [tag]Nokia 6680[/tag] (excuse me for the ugly resolution) while driving for my brother in law and my daughter. I was stuck at the Manila Domestic Airport Road after picking up my brother in law from the Ninoy Aquino International Airport. This junk truck was right in front of me and I quickly took a shot.

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Mashing incident in Greenbelt 3

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There is this mashing incident at Greenbelt 3…

As Angela, the happy wife and mother of our story tells it, she was walking into the mall, trailing her mother and sister and holding two of her children by each hand, when the security guard suddenly appeared in front of her, leaned into her, reached for her handbag slung over her shoulder and touched her left breast. “I screamed and demanded to know why he touched me,” she recalls. “And while he immediately apologized, saying, ‘Hindi ko po sinasadya, [‘I didn’t mean to do it’], I just froze and found myself unable to move.”

okay , I don’t understand why at that particular moment, the male guard inspected the ladies. In my experience at the Ayala Center, there is a male and female guard. Are there different security agencies for each mall? It’s true that Emirates Security apologized and

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Work at Home Mom Part 1

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nook1.jpgThis is my Home-office, Business-office (HOBO) or does Small-office Home-office[ (SOHO) sound better? Whatever you call it, I’ve been a work-at-home-mom since my daughter, M was born in 1987. That’s my working station and right behind it is the kitchen which overlooks the front door of the house. It’s a small nook that allows me to be in touch with kitchen activities and family members hovering behind me.

Everyone is yelling distance away except for my kids if they are in their bedrooms. That’s because the walls of their rooms are almost sound-proof. Nothing to worry about, the Yahoo Messenger is a convenient tool for getting their attention. An example….
ym.jpgMy husband goes “What are you doing?”

“Talking to Lauren”

“you’re lazy. Why can’t you just go to her room? ” He teases.

“Yahoo messenger is faster“. I quip.

The girls had their own computer upon reaching college. I believe that young kids should share a family computer so their activities can be monitored. Not that I don’t trust them . Staying too long in the computer is unhealthy.

One of the hazards of an online business is sitting on the computer chair all day long. Not to mention getting afflicted with Carpal Tunnel Syndrome. I also tend to get engrossed with work that I forget the time.

 

nook2.jpgPhysical activity is limited to finger exercises which does not derive cardio-vascular benefits. Hence, my daily routine entails a two-hour gym workout in between my work. If that’s not possible, the stationary bicycle is a wonderful alternative. As I bike , I watch TV shows at the same time. Computer work also strains my eyes. Just before bedtime, placing a cucumber slices on my eyebags highlights the end of a productive day.

(to be continued…)

Shopping & the Balikbayan Box

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balikbayan box
My daughter’s [tag]balikbayan box[/tag] which she left last summer in San Francisco arrived today. She went on a shopping frenzy after I praised her for her thriftiness and being a wise shopper. But I think she went overboard with the expense on her last week. haha. Inside the box, I discovered several crotchet books, crotchet threads, school supplies , books and catnip for her Siamese Cat. And Quilting and Craft books? That’s odd because Lauren doesn’t quilt. Hmm?

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Cellphone Thieves and Honest Filipinos

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Some of you might know Zach Escudero, a 19 year-old boy who got killed as he fought it out with cellphone thieves. His parents were mutual friends and because of his death, we started a signature campaign to pressure the Senate to act on the prevalence of cellular phone theft . Even the IMEI marking initiated by the National Telecommunications Commission (NTC), did not deter cellphone thieves. In fact, there are many electronic technicians around who know how to unblock a blocked cellphone unit, which are then sold as ““used” or ““reconditioned” cellphones.

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Domestic violence is a priority issue

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It’s about time that the whole Philippines follow the model developed by Lihok Pilipina Foundation and the Cebu City government. In Cebu, men who beat their wives or abuse their children do serious jail time. Unlike in other parts of the country, cases of wife-beating, incest, child abuse and marital rape are not ignored. Although Republic Act No. 9262 (Anti-Violence Against Women and Their Children Act of 2004) has been implemented since March 8 2004, Cebu City is the first city in the country to pass specific ordinances penalizing domestic abuses. Domestic violence aside from poverty is a priority issue that needs to be resolved.