Disabled for 6 months

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If I narrate the whole story on how I fractured my leg, perhaps “Maalala mo kaya?” (weekly TV drama series in ABS CBN) might get hold of my story. Hah, as if. A few close friends and family know the bittersweet story of how I fractured my leg. During those days, my life was like a series of sappy TV soap drama. Anyway, ten months ago on July 2005, I fractured my right leg (the tibia) and dislocated my ankle. I tripped in a pavement which curved irregularly. I slipped and then heard my ankle crackle (literally sounded like firecrackers) and broke my fall on my hand. My foot dangled like it was a separate appendage from my leg. The ankle protruded. The first thought that entered my mind was “there goes my exercise”. I held on to my leg with excruciating pain and tried to align my dislocated leg to my ankle. Although I had a car, it was useless for me to drive. Alone, I brought myself to the ER of Medical City. How naive I was! I thought a cast up to my thighs would fix the fracture in no time. That freaking cast was so heavy that I had to lift it in order to move around. In so much pain. Two days later, I was whisked to the emergency room because an operation was needed immediately.

I seriously thought I would die. Being diabetic and with a heart condition, the operation was delayed until I was cleared for operation. Around 8 screws were nailed into my ankle and tibia. It felt so much better although I was still in pain. Do you know how hard it is walk with one foot? I wasn’t allowed to put weight on the right foot for 6 weeks. I had to learn how to use the crutches before leaving the hospital. We bought a wheelchair and built some ramps around the house. Taking a bath involved 2 monobloc chairs: one for my casted foot and the other for me to sit and bathe myself. Fortunately , my husband is the type of person who knows how to take care of the sick. He doted on me like a sick baby, not complaining if I had to wake him in the dead of the night to get the bedpan.

I was in my neon-green fibercast with heels for 8 weeks but I managed to entertain myself by going to the malls or restaurants. Most of our malls are disable-friendly and of course, I got a special parking place. I frequented Shoemart Makati because the 7th floor parking area of Park Square leads straight to the Ladies Section. Supermarkets like Metro Supermarket in Market! Market! even had wheelchair cart. Moving around in a wheelchair wasn’t that bad at all so long as there is a caregiver and driver to bring you around. People threw sorry glances but it didn’t bother me. I knew my disability was temporary. Whenever I visited Medical City’s Rehab Center , I notice a lot of patients who suffered serious nerve damage such as stroke victims. I knew I was going to get well so I focused on my physical therapy.


By November 2005, I was using only one crutch. The scar on my right leg looks unsightly but it is a reminder of God’s divine intervention. Today, I have a slight difficult in going down the stairs but I can walk for longer distance now. Looking back at my disability, it was an opportunity for me to take care of myself. Even if I could not walk without crutches, I continued my stationary cycling for cardio exercise. I lifted weights to strengthen my arms. I followed a healthy diet. I worked on a new online business that gave me income opportunities. Meditation kept me in a serene mode. I turned stumbling blocks to stepping stones in improving myself . It was during this period of my life that positive changes in our family life evolved.

Sometimes pain can enlighten us. This pain leads and guides us into better choices for our future.

Getting a Globe 3G Mobile Broadband with HSDPA

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button_coveragearea.jpgAs an anniversary present to ourselves, we availed of the latest 3 G capable phone promo from Globe Handyphones. This promo started May 5 and ends on May 12. So why not? GLOBE has to make their 3G capable phones affordable so that it available to as big a market as possible. Anyway, the Nokia N70 can be bought by upgrading to a 2500 peso plan or a zero interest plan for 6, 12 or 18 months using your credit card. Of course we opted for the cheaper method which was the 18 month plan. The cost of the unit with VAT included is 21,992.04 pesos ($431) or 1221.78 pesos month for the next 18 months. The video call cost the same as the regular voice call rates. I don’t know if that same rate will continue on. The rates are valid till May 30, 2006. Aww. So far, 3 G calls are just Globe to Globe subscribers. We haven’t tested the video call yet because it takes 3 days for 3 G services to be activated.

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21st wedding anniversary

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married for 21 yearsTwenty one years ago, I married my boyfriend of 7 years. We’ve had 21 years of [tag]marriage[/tag] and 28 years as a couple. Inspite of the catfights, diverse personalities and the death of our precious son, we are still together. How did we do it? I don’t know. It must be the hopeless romantics in us that keeps us together. I credit my husband for never giving up on me during those times I gave up on him. We celebrated our [tag]wedding anniversary[/tag] with a simple dinner at Via Mare with our 2 daughters. Before dinner we attended the book launch of “Journey beyond the Great Wall” at the National Bookstore , Shangrila Plaza Mall.

oystersFor appetizers, Butch ordered oysters. I whispered “aphrodisiacs” .

” But I can’t eat them“.

Too bad, Butch suffers high uric acid. I ended up eating 5 oysters.

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Successful Book Launch of “Fallen Cradle”

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book launch fallen cradle“[tag]Fallen Cradle[/tag]” is a book of 22 stories by parents who have a lost a child. It was formally launched today at Powerbooks Greenbelt Makati. What can I say? The Book launch was a huge success. The initial 150 books set for the launch ran out. Anvil Publishing rushed to get more stock from the warehouse. My story on Luijoe, My Angel is on page 29. A lot of people say he’s such a handsome boy. I know. We chose that picture because he exudes so much charm.

The first few sentences of my story goes this way:

““If I die, Mama, will I be alive again?” Luijoe asked. My six-year-old was lying on the bed, flipping through the prayer books piled on his tummy.

It was Holy Week, a month before that fateful day of May 27, 2000, the day he drowned in a beach resort in Cebu.

I turned my body to face his and stroked his cheek. How could I explain the mysteries of death to a little boy? ““When we die, Lui, we will live forever, through eternal life in heaven,” I said the lines I’d memorized from the teachings of our Catholic Church.

Of course you have to buy the book to read the rest of the story.

This book paved the way to the positive resolution of my [tag]grief[/tag] journey. During the second blueprint in November 2005, Agnes Prieto invited me to be part of the book. I have never written my loss much less how Luijoe died. Writing Luijoe’s story turned out to be very difficult, often bringing tears as I recalled the painful events. These events were buried deep in my heart and I had to reach out to my innermost feelings. My sister, Myrna L. de Vera helped me a lot with the writing style (Thanks dear sister) and the editing work. Writing Luijoe’s story culimnated into the renewal phase of my grief journey. I submitted the final edit of my story on November 27, 2005. On the same day and inspired by my transformation, I wrote The Compassionate Friends International Council if I could start a Philippines Chapter. That was how The Compassionate Friends Philippines started. Reaching out to other bereaved parents is a living tribute to my son . Luijoe is never entirely gone.

fallen cradlefallen cradle butch
I’ve only attended two book launch events in my lifetime so I can’t really compare if today’s event was a tremendous success. I just said it was a hit because they ran out of copies. Agnes Prieto prepared a touching rose and cradle ceremony with a powerpoint presentation of each child represented in the book. A short anecdote taken from each story and our child’s photo flashed on the screen. The parents picked a single white rose from the table and placed it on the vase by the baby’s cradle. The toys surrounding the cradle belongs to Luijoe. Yes, all these years I’ve kept them in a sealed box. Butch , my dear hubby was a substitute for the absentee parent contributors.

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Shopping for off-campus student housing

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katipunanI glanced at the mirror , smiling and quite satisfied with my latest transaction for an off-campus housing accomodation for my 2 girls. As I inspected my makeup, I was horrified to see my right ear had white dangling earrings while my left had red earrings. Driving at 6:00 am is hazardous to one’s fashion sense. The landlady must have thought I was a nut case. Oh well. Hehehe.

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In fitness and in health till…

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fitness firstButch signed up at Fitness First today. One disdavantage of having a lifetime membership is one gets complacent and postpones visiting the gym. That’s what happened to my husband’s lifetime membership at Slimmer’s World. He’s been a member since the early 1990’s and barely uses it. I’ve been a member of Fitness First since May 2005 and I visit the center everyday. It’s like I have to take advantage of the services and facilities because I pay 2,300 pesos ($45) every month .

After we kissed and made up after our spat, he thought of transforming his negative energies into physical workout. I think he got envious of my transformation and happier disposition. He also noticed that my arms are stronger now. Hehe, I wonder how he noticed. Was it because I carried more grocery bags?

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After our workout, I feel refreshed and bubbly. He seems to be eager to go out of the gym because of his hunger pangs. I never get hungry after a workout.

hubbyHe grins at me because he has a craving for “Gonuts Donuts“. His silvery hair glistened as I took this photo. Hubby has premature gray hairs inspite of the fact that he is two years younger than me. I barely have any white hair. He reminds me of American Idol contestant , Taylor Hicks. Unlike Taylor Hicks, hubby only got his premature gray hairs in his mid -thirties.

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Anyway, “Gonuts Donuts” have a lite version which contains 1 gram of sugar and lesser fat. Hubby orders 3 lite donuts for me. How sweet. My sweet tooth is always wrecking havoc on my weight loss management. I still think they contain evil carbos which stimulate my fats to become even more resistant to weight loss. How can I resist?

The Coños and their Taglish

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My friend Emma showed me the article of her beloved son, Ariel Llanto who passed away last December, 9 2005. Ariel had hepatosplenic gamma delta T-cell lymphoma, a rare and particularly aggressive disease and lived barely one month after the diagnosis. His April 27 article on the Inquirer’s Young Blood was about Leaving Manila. As a Cebuana who studied college in Manila during the mid seventies, Ariel ‘s observations was evident during my time.

I started to uncover social nuances at school. I have vivid memories of roaming around the campus, trawling for evidence of the disparities, in particular, between the way Cebuanos and Manileños spoke. I winced at the sound of the Tagalog accent and words finding their way to English statements. Many girls — and, to my horror, guys — spoke like Kris Aquino.

An amusing breed, known as ““coños,” acted as if they didn’t know how to speak straight Tagalog, opting to communicate in a mangled mish-mash of Tagalog and English (““Taglish”).

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Swirling my way to Belly Dancing

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TurqSpin.gifI’ve been dying to join a [tag]belly dancing[/tag] class ever since my daughter first introduced the idea to me four years ago. Finally after signing a petition, Fitness First The Fort launched “Belly Dancing” wednesday classes. I was late for the 10:00 AM class and ended up watching the women move their bodies to Egyptian music. How exotic.

I caught up with the teacher at the locker area and she said that I can still catch up. She’ll bring colorful hip belts next week for only 700 pesos ($14.00). It costs 750 pesos in Market! Market!

I was brimming with excitement and teased my husband.

“And once I learn the rudiments, I can practice belly dance in front of you.

My second daughter overheard me and shrieked, “I didn’t hear that! How disgusting!”

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Beware abusive men

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“You provoked me”, the wife-beater smugly said.

“It is still no reason to hit me” protested the wife.

This is a common conversation that occurs between the wife beater and the [tag]abused woman[/tag]. Wife beaters have a specific pattern that can be seen early in a relationship.

Abusive men often are highly romantic, sweet and protective early in their relationships. They lavish their women gifts during courtship. For them, women are trophies to be won over and objects to possess, and not people to enter equal partnerships with.

This cycle of abuse can be broken if women know how to empower themselves. The new law, Republic Act (RA) 9262 ““Anti-Violence Against Women and Children is not against men. It is against men who treat their women as property.

The following is a true story of how Republic Act (RA) 9262 is working for a battered wife, a close friend who narrated the following events to me (names and certain situations changed):

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