Photo Hunters theme this week is Colorful.
We had lunch at Sakae Sushi where one can choose Japanese dishes as they are displayed in a conveyor belt. My daughter chose this sushi and I must say its one of the most colorful sushi I’ve ever eaten.
Just take a look at the colors:
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Here is my list of 10 blogs that are making an impact to its readers in 2007. These are blogs that started anytime from August 1, 2006 to the present and are gradually gaining a considerable amount of readership and influence. Thanks to Janette Toral for pioneering this writing project.
Let me just tell you that my criteria is based on blogs with an advocacy and /or my relationship with these bloggers. In no particular order, here they are (drum rolls)
1. Pinoy Moms Network– Okay I am biased . This is a network that Connie and I founded together sometime February 2006. The advocacy is obvious. It is us, mothers, who determine what the future generations will be. The saying that ““the hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world” has never been more true. Moms who have joined our network is reaching the 100 mark.
2. Grief is a Journey is Cathy ‘s advocacy on grief education and recovery particularly GriefShare. Griefshare is a special seminar and support group for people grieving the loss of someone close. Together with her husband, Cathy launched Grief Share at the Greenhills Christian Fellowship in Ortigas sometime last year and seminars are held every saturday. This blog started on October 2006. What a blessing to to those in pain. If GriefShare started in the year 2000, I would have joined it .
3. Pia. Everyone knows her as Senator Pia Cayetano . She is Pia , a family friend, and Tita Pia to my kids. In her blog, she encourages women (men and kids) to start and maintain a fit and healthy lifestyle. Running and walking are one of the easiest exercises. All you need is a good pair of shoes, a place to run or walk and ideally a fitness partner to keep you company or keep you motivated, so her blog touts. No wonder she calls it mydailyrace.blogspot.com which she started on March 27, 2007. But we struggle on, putting one foot in front of the other.
I wished I had bought something new or had my hair done at the salon for our anniversary dinner. Come to think of it, does my husband really care? I don’t think so. Apparently he can’t even tell if I’ve don a new hairstyle or bought a new dress. I can walk past by him with a new dress and he wouldn’t blink an eye. It didn’t matter really because I was bent on celebrating our 22nd wedding anniversary with a simple dinner with the girls. It turns out that our day contained a lot of little gifts which I call blessings.
1. The gift of new beginnnings
We finally got the title of our new home on our anniversary day. How symbolic! Yes, the perfect anniversary gift to ourselves. The transfer of the title to our names took forever thanks to corrupt Bureau of Internal Revenue (BIR) officers and other city hall employees who expected grease money to facilitate the papers. Despite the greed and corruption of the government employees , our hearts are filled with gratitute that after going through 6 months of condominium and house hunting and acquiring a housing loan, we finally got the love nest we dreamed of. A new life in our new home. We are open to all the exciting possibilities for change both within and around us.
May marks another month , another year for you but May of any year since May 27,2000 reminds me that my son is no longer with me.It will be his 7th death anniversary this year.
So why am I still blabbering about my son? Have I not moved on?
This quote best sums up any parent who have lost their child.
““Death ended your child’s life but not his or her relationship to the family” and ““You give up the old person who was physically connected to a now deceased child and make different connections with your child who has died.”
I received many emails from friends or relatives describing how their bereaved relative or friend doesn’t seem to be moving on because the dead child’s items are still being kept or they still talk about them. Also there are emails from bereaved parents who claim they are often criticized and even ridiculed by others for expressing their continuing love and connection to their dead child.
I maintain a sacred bond with my son which is very vital to my well being. I have these moments when I dream and imagine what my son looks like now. There was even a time that I wanted to attend the Grade 6 graduation ceremony of Luijoe’s classmates last year. I just wanted to see how they look like hoping to catch a glimpse of my son’s face through them. When I learned that a blogger had a 13 year old son, I told her to hug him for me. So yeah, wishful thinking.
My prayers were answered last Sunday , well sort of…
One Day Blog Silence in Honor of the victims at Virginia Tech
“Mom, my friends read your blog”
I was surprised. “they do? how did they find out? I always refer to you as M in my entries”
“Mom, duh, you place photos of me and besides word spreads around in the local blogosphere. Your sex education entry made them laugh that I just had to read it myself.”
*oops*
(Hi M’s friends *waves* to M’s friends)
My daughter M is a very private person. Though she owns a blog, she keeps it in a private url for 5 close friends. Soon, she might start a public blog showcasing random photos or anything under the sun.
“Just make sure you write nothing negative about me” she continued on. Then added “and make sure I look good in any photo you post. My _____ happens to read your blog. ”
I assured her, “Ah I don’t and besides I am not about to wash my dirty linen for the whole internet to see”
It got me thinking , this blog belongs in the personal blog category. It revolves around my life, the travails of my grief journey and the road to recovery. My family is also my life and naturally I will mention them from time to time. When I started this blog, I felt squeamish about revealing the sordid details of my life . But how else will readers empathize ? I needed to write on a personal level.
If there are lessons to be learned in my 14 months of blogging and getting more exposure is that sooner or later , intrigues arise. Take for instance, a certain blogger might read entries about your spirituality and starts judging your character. Or someone criticizes your writing style. Do you think blogs are read because they convey journalistic or linguistic appeal to readers ? Blogs are not newspapers. If they don’t like how bloggers write, grab a newspaper or magazine, for crying out loud. Better yet, close the browser and blog about how crappy we are in their own blog.
Anyway, I digress.
A personal blog is personal. I go out of my way to relate relevant experiences and include the advice, lessons or gifts learned from it. If my readers didn’t care about my opinion , would they be reading my blog? If they didn’t care, they’d hop on to the next blog. Reading the human emotions associated with the blogger and the interactive discussions is what separates blogging from traditional media.
Aside from common-sense , avoidance of personal attacks and posting non-bloggable items, how personal should a personal blog be?
A virtual office was in the pipeline while I was still residing at Makati City. But I’ve never gotten around to getting one since I’ve moved homes now. Remember I showed you my Small-Office Home-Office (SOHO) at my old home? Well I’m going to give you a sneak preview of my SOHO over at our cozy home in Pasig City. I don’t know which sounds better. Home-office, Business-office (HOBO) or Small-office Home-office (SOHO) ?
I still have a lot of work to do in the house. I want more decors , furniture here and there. Unfortunately, furnishings, home accessories and other decors are quite expensive so they will have to wait. Right now I just have the bare essentials.
Wi-fi reception was poor in our old home because of the thick concrete walls. I’m quite happy that the Globe Broadband was bundled with a wi-fi router and the reception is pretty strong.
I have four workstations with three Internet Service Providers (Globe Broadband, PLDT MyDSL and Smart Bro) for connection redundancy. I like the idea of variety in my work place. Each of my working space has a purpose. Perhaps I want to blog, work on some papers , websites or just go blog hopping. My mood of the day determines the location of my work.
1. Writing Table at the First Level
This writing table sits at the foot of the stairs . Originally I planned to put a console table here. But see, a console’s purpose in life is decorative . I decided that that every furniture I buy should have functionality.
Working here at my antique narra writing table is best at around 7:00 AM after my dear husband leaves for office . Country angels adorn my table. Hearing the chirping Maya birds and gazing at the greenery of the pocket garden is a good start for the day. This nook works best for me when I am in a calm mood.
I usually stay here until 9:00 AM , checking emails, working on webhosting orders or tickets. Then I get up to check household work for the day. When I come back, the cats decide to invade my table.
Kylee thinks the window view is lovely.
Kylee peeks at my Twitter while Lady naps on my chair.
2. Workstation at the second level
Going up the stairs, the workstation aka mini library greets me at the landing. I want to shield the sunlight with beige Roman Shades but ugh, I still need to save money for that.
Updated (June 28, 2007)
This is my custom-built workstation (built by Connie’s carpenter) where my PLDT mydsl connection is. This is where I stay most of my mornings if I need to pay bills, call people or just do paperwork. As you can see I avoid papers on my desk. They are all inside the drawers . Instead of ugly looking Filing cabinets I had drawers built in the bottom. I use a temporary monobloc chair because I haven’t found the perfect working chair. If I can’t find a white swivel chair then I might as well buy a colored chair. My workaholic mood works best in this working area.
Behind me are Butch books. I keep telling him to sort out his books since it just accumulates dust. It’s one reason I shut the windows in this part of the house.
Usually I go the gym in the late morning once I’ve settled all the work to be done for the day.
3. The couch at the Dining room
The dining room is the favorite part of our home. It’s the soul of the house, a place of conversation. When the kids or my husband are having a snack, I am sometimes found lounging on the couch. If work piles up, I can multitask with my macbook while supervising the food preparation, cooking or house cleaning. Most of the time, I am just doing menial work online while seated here.
4. My bed.
During extremely hot weather, I stay in my bedroom. Turning the airconditioning of the whole house is not a good idea so I prefer to stay in a smaller room where electricity cost won’t be as much. I plan to put a writing table by the bay window as soon as I can save enough for this. I have this thing about windows. I like to pause in between my work hours then look as far as I can .
At night , Butch and I read websites or blog hop before we call it a night. You can see his laptop on his side table.
In the rare occasion that PLDT MyDSL or Globe Broadband is down, I still have one more ISP (SMART BRO) found at the kids’ bedrooms.
Lauren’s blue room and M’s Green room
Now if all three ISP’s are down, I will just sleep, right?
So there you have it. In my ecommerce business , do I really need to lease an office space when I can easily work at my home office? The flexibility of my SOHO allows me to move around as I work . Sitting down in one area stiffles my creativity. I like to work and enjoy the view at the same time.
Now tell me, what part of your house is a favorite spot for blogging or surfing sites?
The couple that blogs together stays together. I’m just kidding of course. Aside from reading books, Butch and I surf the internet together, share sites of interest or we go blog-hopping before we call it a night. I think it’s really sweet that my ex-technophobe husband took an interest in my hobby turned business venture. Who would have thought he’d be blogging today? A few years ago, he snickered at the internet saying it was a waste of time. I’m beginning to think that people who scoff at it are just intimidated or clueless of technology. It took a lot of love and patience to teach him to turn on the computer, firing the browser, surfing the net and posting an entry. And today, we enjoy a common interest- blogging or reading blogs before we sleep. I know… how boring.
Oftentimes, it’s the little things that matter in a relationship. Let me count our simplest pleasures.
1. Sending email or chatting via Google talk at any time of day. I always close my email or chat with “your loving wife”, or “love and kisses” or “your sexy wife” “love you”. In turn he affirms my email with “Dear Loving Wife..” or ends our chat “see you , dear or I love you”. We never tire of saying sweet nothings to each other.
2. Gazing lovingly at each other. Someone told me that my daughter is so obvious with her crush because she kept staring at him. Guess where she got that quirkiness? From her dad! To this day, my husband gazes at me lovingly (on random moments) as if it’s the first time he met me. As if I am the most attractive woman in the world.
3. Buying me Flowers when there is no occassion. Butch rarely buys me flowers but there are those days when he buys a bouquet just because.
4. Saying affirmations to each other. There are those gloomy days that just get in the way of positive thinking . One way to empower the good in ourselves is through affirmations: the positive statements we make to each other : “I love you”, “You are good enough”, “Our life is good”, “I’m glad I have you”. Positive thinking doesn’t mean we think unrealistically or revert to denial. It’s just we don’t dwell on the negative parts of our experience.
A few bloggers like Abe and Anton shared their blogging success to the participants of the iblog 3 on its second day. My talk on the first day was “Personal Blogging Success” ( download the powerpoint of the My Personal Blogging Success Story). But how is blog success really measured? In terms of metrics, I am just average compared to Abe and Anton. What about blog goals? Definitely yes! The primary goal of my blog is to promote “grief support in the Philippines” so others may find solace or comfort in their grief journey. Success is measured on the number of inquiries and members in The Compassionate Friends and in Cathy’s advocacy, Grief Share. Like I mentioned in the summit, the rest is just “icing on the cake”.
Ambivalent feelings rushed over me as I prepared for this talk. I think it had to do with “survivor guilt”. Yes it still hits me sometimes. Guilt. When I feel the fullness and joy of life, I feel guilty that my loved ones are not here today. I felt sadness wash over me knowing that this blog would not have existed if my son died. I wanted my dad to hear me speak in public. Dad is my idol when it comes to public speaking. It’s the reason I always put Lardizabal-Dado in my name. These fleeting moments of sadness pass as I realize that the pain has turned into wonderful blessings. It is still hard for me to say I lost my son in public without tearing. And then the guilt hit me again as I stood on the podium. I sounded so bland in my talk. I had to get my bearings so I wouldn’t bring the summit into a tearful activity. I kept saying to myself Be present to this day…this day which is precious in itself and different from any other day I have had or will have
Life is full of wonder and love and I embrace every new person I met in the [tag]iblog 3 summit[/tag]. If I forgot to mention you, blame it on my fragile brain cells.
All day yesterday, Lauren complained how she was nervous over her topic “Do’s and Don’ts of Personal Blogging for Iblog 3 Summit because it would be her first public speaking engagment. I told her not to worry and just be herself as if she were just blogging. True to form, she captured her audience with her wit and charm.Listen to Lauren’s Podcast and judge for yourself. Her powerpoint can also be downloaded as you listen to her podcast. (Warning to sensitive readers: May contain Offensive language in the Podcast Intro)
In answer to the question if I read her blog. I know Lauren has a private blog since she entered college which I don’t bother to find out but I read her public blog. Recently , I was asked if I cringe over the cuss words that she uses. Her blog is her way of expression and for me to censor it is just not right. She limits or avoids cuss words in front of us. I don’t curse myself but her dad does. So how can I tell my own daughter not to say words when her own father does it?
And I finally met Dine!