How many children do you see playing on the streets, running and screaming around during summer? That looks like a distant memory nowadays as most kids opt to stay inside their houses or in internet cafes to play on computers and tablets. Long gone are the days wherein kids are the life of the neighborhood.

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Magna Kultura, a Philippine based NGO believes that children should continue playing traditional Filipino games. Not only to preserve our cultural heritage, but also to develop their mind, body and character.

Why is Larong Pinoy important?

Many relevant studies show that playing outdoors is more beneficial for kids compared to playing with computer games. Children who spend more time with gadgets tend to be more laid back, lazy, insecure, lacking in social skills and difficulty in accepting defeat.  Children who are more physically active, on the other hand, have improved physical and motor skills, they are able to develop strategic logic and adapt well to their environment. They also learn the value of cooperation and teamwork.

Here are some of the most popular Philippine Games for kids:

1.      Sipa – A ‘sipa’ is made of washer with colorful threads attached to it. Two or more kids could play this game. The objective of the game is simple. One has to toss the sipaupwards and kick it several times with his foot, elbows or head and make sure that the sipa does not fall onto the ground. The player who has the most number of kicks wins the game. Sipa is also called ‘Sepak Takraw’ and it is our ‘Pambansang Laro.’

2.      Luksong Tinik – four or more participants are needed to play this game. The players are divided into two teams with equal number of members. The two teams need to assign a ‘nanay’ for each team. The other players will be the ‘anak’. The ‘nanay’ of each team are supposed to be the high jumpers.  A slipper toss will decide who play first. The ‘nanay’ and her ‘mga anak’ will jump one by one on obstacles assembled by the other team. If the ‘anak’ makes a fault and touches the obstacle, the ‘nanay’ will jump for the ‘anak’ to save her. If the ‘nanay’ also touches the obstacle, the jumping team will lose and the other team with take their chance.

3.      Tumbang Preso – This popular street game requires three or more players. Each player is given a ‘pamato’, which they will use to strike a flattened empty tin can.  The tin can will be placed in an upright position and will be guarded by a ‘taya’. The other players will aim to strike the tin can while the ‘taya’ is guarding it. The ‘taya’ could freely tag any player who comes near the tin can as long as the tin can is still in an upright position. When the ‘taya’ tags a player, the tagged player automatically becomes the ‘taya’. In the event that one of the players is able to strike the tin can, the ‘taya’ should immediately put the tin can in an upright position before he could tag the players again.

4.      Patintero – Six to eight players are needed to play this fun, outdoor game. After dividing the players into equal teams. Participants need to draw a rectangular playing field on the ground which is usually five to six meters and is divided into four equal parts. A coin toss will determine who among the teams will run or will be tagged. The objective of the runners is to run back and forth the lines without being tagged by the other team. When a runner is able to cross back and forth from point A to point B without being tagged, the running teams will earn one point.  If a runner gets tagged, the teams will change places and the other team will have the opportunity to score. The first team to win three consecutive points wins.

5.      Tsato – Tsato can be played by two or more players wherein each player has one flat stick and a one short flat piece of wood. A small square hole is dug and the short flat piece of wood will be placed on it. Player A needs to hit the wood up in the air and hit it as far as he can with his other stick. The farther the distance of the wood (the number of stick length is the usual gauge on the distance of the wood from its starting point), the more points for the player. If player B catchers the wood of Player A after he hits his wood, the points for that hit is not counted.

6.      Agawan base -This is an all-time favorite game among children. There are two teams with two opposite bases. The goal is to tag the players of the other team without being tagged. Players will merely run around trying to bait themselves for the other team, while other teammates will try to tag those who will run after them.  If a player is tagged, he will become the prisoner of the other team and he could only be rescued if the prisoner’s teammates are able to tag their opponent’s base. The team that can tag the other team’s base will win.

7.      Ten-twenty – This game could be played by four or more players by using a stretched garter. A pair needs to face each other from a distance and stretch the garter around them. The member of the other pair will be the jumpers and will need to do a jumping ‘routine’ over the garter. The garter will start around the ankles of the other pair and will progress to knee height, then around the armpit.  The aim is to perfect the jumping routine.

It is the duty of parents to expose their kids to real, physical games and not limit them to the comforts of their electronic gadgets.  By playing Filipino games, children educated with the importance of Filipino culture and they are also able to bond and have fun with their parents, siblings and playmates this summer.

by Tanya Jamon-Navarro, as originally posted at Nasaan na ang mga larong pambata? at the Philippine Online Chronicles

by Amihan Euza Mabalay, originally posted at Counting happiness in 100 days , Philippine Online Chronicles

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With our fast-paced multi-tasking life, we often get drowned in seemingly never-ending workload, household and parent duties to fulfill. Sometimes we forget to pause and find delight in the moment. Oftentimes, we neglect little things that value the most.

In this age of modern technology wherein popular culture has taken over our lives, social media consumption has been equated to happiness to consumerism. The Philippines was recently dubbed by Time Magazine as the ‘selfie’ capital of the world, with the cities of Pasig and Makati with the most number of ‘selfie’ images taken. From the word itself, ‘selfie’ is done for the benefit of oneself, either for self-exploration or plain narcissism.

Cyber-happines

We just love connecting through social media. The same medium that introduced us to ‘selfies,’ food porn, memes and other individualized online content prove that it can veer away from materialization of culture.

Project 100happydays” challenges everyone to find happiness in everyday lives, no matter how small and simple it is. This global social media photo sharing/chronicling challenge aims to make people realize that they can be truly happy. A lot of people have actually joined the challenge, which explains many posts counting days (Day 1 and so on) with hashtag #100days  all around Twitter, Instagram and Facebook. Though we see the ‘selfies’ as entries, the 100happydays site claims that the project is not to show-off one’s possessions to please others or make them envious of one’s life or “happiness.”

Dmitry Golubnichy, the 27-year-old Swiss behind the project says that “being happy is a choice and everyone can be happy just by appreciating little things in life one has instead of engaging in the constant chase for ever rising internal & external expectations, which leaves no time for being happy.”

The campaign is similar to the 2008 project “365 grateful” of Queensland-based Hailey Bartholomew. Bartholomew was then fighting depression from personal, motherhood and marriage problems when she encountered the help of a nun who told her to appreciate at least one thing each day in her life. She started capturing these on Polaroid camera and then posted these on Flickr. Since then, inspired people began to do their own versions. Bartholomew has released a book on the project, co-authored by her husband and is currently making the documentary (film) version.

Real happiness

Apparently,100happydays and other similar photo challenge projects with the themes focused on gratefulness, gratitude, life appreciation and happiness can well serve its purpose if participants can keep themselves and their entries socially sensitive. It would be more substantial and inspirational if people refrain from posting entries glorifying individualist interests (e.g. shoes, pedicured nails, fancy food, “outfit of the day,” and more). After all, genuine happiness doesn’t come from these trivial material things. Happiness emanates from our self-identification, self-worth and understanding of our role and purpose in this world. It is also hinged on the good, real relationships we have with the people around us.

Cyberspace may have gained us a thousand virtual friends or followers who “like” or “love/heart” our posts. But in reality, our real relationship with people around us is what really counts. If everyone appreciates small and random acts of kindness, then our immediate surroundings – our workplace, school or home can be a better place.

Social media popularized (and also corrupted) the abbreviation YOLO (“You only live once”) which makes this apt for the search for happiness of those who have joined and would like to join the 100happydays challenge – we only live once so we must make the most out of it, savor every moment, and appreciate every grain of happiness.

Like any “trending” topic on the Internet, the #100happydays  hype will soon end. But these kind of challenges or projects will always be significant for those who are struggling to find their happiness in the midst of everyday busy and (sometimes, monotonous) life.

Life’s true joys are those that don’t have price tags, so start sharing your happy days! Carpe diem!

 

Images Top photo screencaptured from 100happydays.com. Some rights reserved.

carlos mangco new lawyer

Congratulations to my nephew, Atty. Carlos Mangco, for passing the Philippine bar exam! His dad is my late brother, Oscar Carlos Lardizabal. Like my sister said, my brother must be smiling ear to ear in Heaven. A lot of credit goes to Belle, Carlos’ mom who raised my nephew with such loving support. I am also proud that he is the first Lardizabal lawyer. My uncle studied law before World War II but was killed. I heard that my late uncle studied law because of land grabbing cases and needed to learn the law to seek justice.

carlos mangco with my brother

Congratulations to all the new lawyers!

Here is the complete 2013 Bar results

TOP 10:

1. Nielson Pangan – University of the Philippines — 85.8%

2. Mark Xavier D. Oyales – University of the Philippines — 85.45%

Dianna Louise R. Wilwayco – Ateneo de Manila — 85.45%

3. Rudy Ortea – University of Batangas— 84.2%

4. Eden Catherine Mopia – University of the Philippines — 84.05%

5. Tercel Maria Mercado-Gephart – University of San Carlos — 83.9%

6. Manuel Sarausad – University of Cebu — 83.8%

7. Katrine Suyat – San Beda College Manila — 83.75%

8. Michael Tiu Jr – University of the Philippines — 83.70%

9. Marjorie Ivory Fulgueras – Ateneo de Manila — 83.65%

10. Cyril Arnesto – University of the Philippines — 83.60%

golden girlsA few years back, my husband and I facilitated a grief support group for Grief Share . My friend, Cathy assigned me to 4 lovable golden girls, with age ranging from 67 to 81 years old. I was turning turn 50 years old that time. As I watched them, I couldn’t help but smile at these brave and feisty widows . Laughing, crying and talking with these golden girls opened my eyes to living old gracefully.

After going through the discussion on the “Emotions of Grief”, I asked Eden (not her real name) on how she manages to look so young and bubbly at 81 years old. Eden showed a calm disposistion and sparkle in her eyes .

In her perfect , modulated English diction, she listed three tips.

1. Of course you know, eat a healthy balanced diet. She added that she doesn’t take pills for any ailment. Just vitamins and minerals. Oh wow , and here I am taking prophylactic medication for my high blood pressure and diabetes.

2. Exercise regulary. I play tennis 4 times a week.
(I was pleasantly surprised at her stamina. Imagine I was 49 years old that time and I begged off playing badminton with Abe because of my shoulder aches.)

3. And most importantly, peace of mind.

I asked “how do you achieve peace of mind?”

Eden continues “I lift all my problems of the day to the Lord. Every day I have problems but when I pray before bedtime, I know the Lord will take care of me”

Of course I knew that. My thoughts rattled off. I was captivated as I listened to this “time machine” who shared her wisdom and experience with me.

Eden is not done talking yet . She explained that when her husband was still alive, they’d both pray together every night without fail. “And you know what? we never faced any heavy burden the next day”

Ack, I twisted my hands.

I felt guilty. A few days ago, my husband and I had a small argument over who did more work on the house improvements. Apparently , he felt guilty that I did most of the work. I tried to lift his spirits “you did a lot of work by giving me the money to buy this house”. He continued to whine. Getting impatient with his self-pitying tactics, I shut myself in my bedroom. “I have no patience for this”. Staying in my room while he got holed up in our meditation room downstairs helped us cool our heads off. But we should have talked it out again and prayed before calling it a night.

Eden’s tips to living old gracefully is not new. We all know these secrets but to actually see 4 single young-at-heart women assured me that old age is something to look forward to.

Ask any golden girl her secrets and you’ll probably get the same answers.

I’d like to make it clear that even though I write about parenting and family life, I do not claim to be an expert. I share family experiences and some of my parenting styles that worked or didn’t work for me. You can take what you like and leave the rest.

A few years ago, a group of bright UP students requested an interview on my parental views and experiences on the Children’s Right to Participate. I didn’t have time to research about Children’s rights before the interview but I read up on it after I arrived home. Below is the UNICEF’s Children’s Right To Participate .

Read More →

 

senate hearing cybercrime bills

I was not supposed to be one of the resource persons at the Senate Hearing on the Cybercrime bills but I had to tell my story because no one else have shown an actual threat on cyber-libel.  I promised to make it a one-minute speech. Due to time constraints, I was not able to say everything I wanted to say so here it is:

I am Noemi Lardizabal-Dado otherwise known as mom blogger in social media. I have been online since 1995 with my children. My kids taught me to be the tech-savvy mom I am today. In 1996, as internet safety head of a  global fun site for children , I soon drafted the 10 golden rules on online safety for young kids. In 1996, there were less than 12,000 internet users in the Philippines. It wasn’t cool for a kid to be online during those days so I kept watch over my children . I continue to do so 19 years later, but this time watching  over the children of my friends by using social media for social good.

In the mid-90s, my children were using PCs but the kids these days use mobile platforms. “Almost everyone is now connected online. You can find bloggers younger than 10 years old. They are on social networking sites as well. Social media has become the new conversation platform,” as my friend Jane Uymatiao writes in “A Parent Worries over the Anti-Cybercrime Law

senate hearing on cyberlibel 1The  Generation C or connected citizen is not only web-savvy but opinionated. “The kids of today are very outspoken and candid”  more candid than I ever was as a teenager. Jane adds “that libel can be relative, depending on whether the party offended is thin-skinned or not. One person may take offense at something written while another may just shrug it off. Now comes this law.”

The youth talk of fashion, music, books and many other things and at times get frustrated at products and services.  Most of these kids turn online to talk or rant to their peers .

I am here to present an actual case of a libel threat.

This happened to a young writer  in a piece she wrote about a clothing store. As an editor of an online media site, I received a letter from the lawyer of this clothing store and threatened to sue me if I did not remove the offending paragraph.  The last part of the demand letter ends with this:

“your failure and or refusal to comply with the afore-mentioned demands will constrain us to institute the necessary civil and criminal  suit against you in order to protect our client’s interest”

Imagine the look of dismay of the young writer when I informed her that she had to remove that paragraph. In my opinion, the paragraph was not malicious. It was a statement of a fact , found all over the internet. As you can see, truth is not a defense. There were other conditions, that I had to issue an apology.  The young writer was visibly upset and traumatized by this experience.

Why was I singled out among the other bloggers? Was it because I was more identifiable than others.  Other blog posts used screen names or were anonymous.

Can you imagine a young child being told by a parent that she/he might have committed libel? Our kids are outspoken but they are good kids. Just imagine if any of our kids was slapped with a libel charge. What if that was your kid? A kid of your friend? What an injustice!

We pave the way for our children  to be future leaders by nurturing them in body, mind and spirit including their online lives.  I agree with my fellow mom  that “the controversial provisions of this law only serve to sow oppressive fear instead of constructive formation.”

I ask that the cyber libel provision be repealed as well as the rest of the cybercrime prevention act.

at the senate hearing

Photo of the Senate Hearing by Arpee Lazaro. Used with permission. Some rights reserved.

 

 
 Originally posted at the Philippine Online Chronicles.
 

money

I often correct myself whenever the kids used to ask me “mom can we afford to buy _______?”. See, my standard reply is always ” I don’t have money” and true enough, money was always tight. I changed my words from limiting ones to those with a positive energy vibration. I say ” I don’t have the cash right now but we will soon have and make priorities for our needs”.

When asked “Do we have enough?” I answer with “Yes there is plenty” which affirms that there is enough for us in the family. If you ask the angels for just enough, that’s exactly what you will get. Try asking for ‘plenty’ and affirming  ‘plenty’ and you’ll always get much better than what you expect.

I soon found out the words that I say have a direct impact upon my finances. of course, there is that matter on financial management. Even if I have enough, I set priorities. One thing I appreciate with my two daughters is that they never ask for expensive or the latest gadgets, just the basic needs like computer or cellphone and don’t really mind hand-me-downs from me. I am proud that they save their hard-earned income for their education or real estate investment.

Sometimes, a painful situation will wake us up to the role that our vocabulary is playing, as a woman named Caryn discovered. After she was laid off from her engineering job, she started telling people, ““I am unemployed.” Caryn desperately searched for a new job, without success. Then she realized that by continually saying that she was unemployed, she was creating that situation. So she stopped using that word, and shortly afterwards, she was offered an engineering position that would pay all of her bills.

Money-Quote

I believe that just changing the words I was using with myself and others brought abundance very quickly into my life.

Here are some affirmations that I often say daily.

I am open to receive.
I am open to abundance.
I am very focused and persistent.
I am wealthy and successful, everyday, in all that I do.
I am always supplied with whatever I require.
I am prosperous, healthy and happy.
I am ready to receive all that I require.
I am worthy of receiving abundance.
I am the source of my abundance.
I am a brilliant and savvy business person.
I am open to opportunities.
I am commited, determined and passionate about what I do.
I am capable.
I am a master at what I do.
I am a success.
I am generous.
I am happy, healthy, and wealthy.
I am wealthy in every areas of my life.
I am open to the flow of great abundance in all areas of my life.
I am so happy and grateful now that I make PHP_____ per month.
I am becoming more prosperous and successful every day.
I am talented and resourceful.
I am building a successful and important business that will assist in making a difference in my life and the lives of those I touch.
I have an abundance of whatever I require.
I have absolute certainty in my ability to generate any amount of income I choose.
I have unlimited abundance.
I have more than enough.
I have all the resources I need right now to become a multi-millionaire.
I have all the skills, intelligence, contacts and money I need right now to create an incredible masterpiece with my business.
I give and receive freely.
I value my time, energy, and money.
I consistently attract success-minded entrepreneurs to assist me to grow my business.
I deserve to be prosperous.
I focus on what I love and draw it to me.
I trust that the universe will always meet my needs.
I give myself permission to have what I want.
I expect and receive the very best.
I accept good things into my life with gratitude.
I have much to offer the world.
I allow myself to enjoy life.
I bring love to everything I do.
I appreciate all that I have.
I always do my best.
I give myself permission to be, do, and have what I want.
I use my thoughts and emotions to attract abundance effortlessly.
I have great abundance flowing into my business, which affords every luxury that I desire.

Indeed, what you say is what you get.

Update March 26- Mommy Blogger Contest Entries with the top 3 most number of Qualified Comments

1. Tina Ong

http://thephenomenalmama.blogspot.jp/2014/02/my-new-organizing-buddy-epson.html 191

2. Cai Sio

http://www.applesanddumplings.com/2014/03/an-epson-giveaway-for-oc-and-crafter-in.html 147

3. Tin Dychiao

http://www.manilafashionobserver.com/2014/02/lets-do-epson-labelworkspicturemate.html 131

DEADLINE is March 21: Get a chance to win a PictureMate PM245 or a LabelWorks LW-300. Check out my contest/giveaway below the cut for more details.

epson eventAll moms are busy moms. Now even if my kids are all grown-up, I still need a system for everything. Being organized brings so much peace of mind and a balance between having grace for yourself and doing hard work. There are many ways to organize and one of them is setting up labelling system especially with our laundry. With adult children, our clothes get often mixed up. Of course , one way is to use a pen to mark each clothing item. But how cool is that? What about the photos taken from my digital camera? Does it need to be forever floating in the “cloud”?

At a mommy blogger event organized by Epson , they showed us how to turn the ordinary to an extraordinary. I loved how they showed two products that every mommy can use: the Epson Label Maker and the Epson Picture Mate. The Labelmaker creates perfect labels every time while the Picture Maker is your friendly mobile photo lab.

You will be amazed with these two Epson products but let me show you why:

 

Epson LabelMaker LW-300

my epson labelworks

Don’t you love a system where you can churn out labels in a fast and efficient way? Epson showed us with this lightweight and portable LW300 that accepts 9, 12  and 18 mm tape widths. It is also ideal for your home office labelling , including filing, storing, asset tagging and barcode printing. At home it is great to label your medicines and those pretty generic bottles at the kitchen.

epson labelworks 2

With a wide selection of tapes, sizes and colors , I can be sure one is right for me. Imagine, I have the choice of standard, transparent, pastel, metallic, ribbon , iron-ons and specialist cable wrap labels.  Each tape is 8 meters long and quite economical because it leaves minimal margins and less waste.

epson label maker 4

It is quite user friendly. In each box, there is a default black ink on white sticker label. Just remove it and place directly on the slot. It needs six triple A batteries though.
epson label maker

It is so simple to use especially with its ergonomic buttons.  Now you will be so amazed at the 14 font types and 10 different styles (bold, shadow, outline,)  457 symbols and 87 frames for cool designing on your label. There are dedicated buttons to give quick access to fonts, frames, cutting and printing functions.  It can also store up to 50 custom label designs for instant recall.  The backlit LCD screen gives a clear view whatever the light conditions are.

epson labelworks1

The first thing I did is label my Label works. It is so pretty. I will be using my Epson Labelworks to label my clothes so it is easier to sort out the laundry and store in our respective cabinets.

ribbon labels from epson label maker

Janice , Mommy Mundo created a ribbon label. Love it? I am sure you do.

Epson PictureMate PM 245: Your Mobile Photo Lab

What is the use of those awesome digital photos if they cannot be printed. I know we can have online photos but it is also good to organize some of these selected photos in a paper album. I have always wanted to print family photos or even my customized photos instantly and with a photo reproduction that lasts?  Epson showed us the Picturemate PM 245 with it s Epson Micro Piezo print head technology. It aims to deliver superb and lasting photo prints at amazing print speed and low cost.

epson picture maker

Look at how handy it looks. Photo printing is made easy even without a PC. It can create 4 x 6 photo prints  in lab quality in 37 seconds. As an added bonus, it comes with the option of borderless printouts.  Wow, I can now easily customize printing to fit various photo sizes for IDs, passports and visas. With just one click, I can print multiple copies in multiple sizes.

epson picture catridge

I can produce 150 4R prints with a picture pack that costs only 1200 pesos or 8 pesos for each 4R print. Now that’s affordable considering I can create my customized printing needs.

epson picture maker8

According to Epson, the smudge , scratch, water and fade-resistant Epson Claria photographic inks  creates such vibrant photos that last up to 200 years. Direct printing is done through the built-in memory card or connecting the digital camera using PictBridge or USB direct,  The tiltable 2.4″ LCD screen allows you to view and make last-minute effects before printing. Now you know why it is so amazing!

After the mommy blogger event, we all had a photo shoot and to test drive the printer. It is so nice. Now you know why I believe the Epson LabelWorks & PictureMate makes organizing so much easier and fun!

picture maker 5

I will be using the Epson PictureMate for printing out the family travel photos that are stored in my hard drive.

Suggested Selling Prices

The Epson Picturemate PM 245 SRP is 7,995 pesos and the Photo cartridge T5852 with the 150 sheets 4R is PHP 1,200.

The Epson Labelworks LW 300 SRP is 2,268 pesos while the LW 400 is 3,175 pesos. Cartridges are : ?9mm Tape SRP: PHP 582.00
12mm Tape SRP: PHP 582.00

LabelWorks Tapes and PicturePack are available at Printers2Go at http://printers2go.ph or email printers2go@gmail.com

Contest Mechanics

1. Just write on the comment section below “I WANT PICTUREMATE AND LABELWORKS ” and your reasons why
i.e. “I WANT PICTUREMATE AND LABELWORKS so that I can creatively feature my baby’s milestones on the scrapbook I am making for her.

2. Multiple entries/ comments from the same commenter will only be counted as one entry.

3. Winners should be based in the Philippines or have a Philippine mail address.

4. Please make sure your name in the comment section matches your ID card which will be used in claiming the prize.

5. If I get chosen to be the top 3 mom bloggers with the most number of valid comments, I get the chance to raffle either a PictureMate PM245 or LabelWorks LW-300 so help me promote this blog post too.

i. Most number of valid comments – (1) PictureMate PM245 worth 7,995 pesos
ii. 2nd most number of valid comments – (1) LabelWorks LW-400 worth 3,175 pesos
iii. 3rd most number of valid comments – (1) LabelWorks LW-300 worth 2,268 pesos

5. Deadline for comments: March 21, 2014

gossipNo, it is not part of the 12 commandments so we often think that is perfectly alright to gossip especially when we are offended by someone. It is a nasty way of getting even. Some people even call it therapy so they make fun of their victims. No wonder back-talks are so rampant. It happens in the office, sari-sari store hang-outs, bars and wherever two or more heads come together.

We could even be guilty ourselves when we subconsciously join in the chatter about somebody else. There is some kind of thrill in contributing information (more often an exaggerated version) and making a juicy item even juicier at the expense of other people. Does it even come as a surprise that tabloid blind items are devoured like hotcakes?

But gossip is not just plain senseless chatter. While we often think that telltales are harmless and passing, it can actually be a bad reflection on the rumormongerer. Yes, that could be me and you. M.Farouk Radwan explains in his article “The Psychology of Gossip” that it is a sign of “low self esteem, jealousy, frustration, anger and weakness.”

“Ate, magandang salita po ba ang hinayupak?” (Is the word “hinayupak” good?) Mimi’s maid asked. There is no direct translation of “hinayupak”. It is coined from the Tagalog term “hayop” or animal.

Mimi wondered where the househelp picked up the word. “Well, it depends. If it is said jokingly, it is okay. But if said when mad, it could be bad. Why?”

“I overheard your mother-in-law call you ‘hinayupak kong manugang’ (loosely translated as an animal-like daughter-in-law) as she spoke to her sister and it did not sound good.” No wonder her husband’s relatives give her a funny look and a cold shoulder treatment during family gatherings.

A few months after, her mother-in-law’s storekeeper remarked at Mimi, “You’re not that bad. Your mother-in-law told me you have an attitude.”

Norman had it worse. His production assistant spread the rumor that he has been keeping the office kitty to himself and uses the money to renovate his house. The technical people came to Norman’s defense. He was just not the type to do it. He has always been fair and square with them in the distribution of talent fees even of food during production work.

Norman was lucky his good reputation protected him from the vicious gossip of a young gossiper.  It was just quite unfortunate for Mimi to be an unwitting victim of one person she trusted.

Going beyond skin deep, jealousy might have been the main reason why the production assistant spread lies about Norman. The girl is an only child used to getting all of her parents’ attention. It must have been hard for the brat to accept that someone was getting better praises so she attempted to discredit her immediate supervisor.   Lucky for Norman, his colleagues’ belief in him quashed the bad press release before it went too far.

Mimi’s mother-in-law, on the other hand, may have been driven by a sense of low self-esteem. She is person with disability and tried to compensate her physical weakness with a strong presence. Her voice is booming and bosses everybody around with her nitpicking in an attempt to put up an air of superiority. It must have been harder to sustain her superficial confidence when her son married a professional whom everyone found quite pleasing so she did everything to discredit her daughter-in-law with every opportunity she gets.

Understanding the psychology of the tittle-tattler may help the offended party to be more magnanimous but more often than not, the ugly scars stay.  It took a while before Norman forgave his erring subordinate but he made sure walls were built between them. Mimi may have chosen to forgive her mother-in-law out of love for her husband but the crack of distrust forever stays in her mind affecting their relationship one way or the other.

Gossip hurts way deep than we can ever imagine. No wonder it is aptly called backstabbing.   Pope Francis put it succinctly as he branded gossip as murder. In his September 14, 2013 homily at the Vatican, he pointed out that “when we participate in this sin, we imitate Cain’s gesture in killing his brother Abel.”

He expounded on the First Letterof John the Apostle, “anyone who has hatred for his brother is a murderer, he walks in darkness, he who judges his brother walks in darkness,” and that those who judge or speak ill of others are “Christian murderers.”

Ouch! That means we are no better than the cold-blooded criminal in death row. So how do we bite our tongue in the face of very tempting chinwags?

Pope Francis gives a heavenly motivation for a down-to-earth advice. Although some people believe certain persons deserve to be gossiped about, he encouraged the Mass-goers to “Go and pray for him! Go and do penance for her! And then, if it is necessary, speak to that person who may be able to seek remedy for the problem. But don’t tell everyone!”

The spirit may be willing to change but the flesh is too weak to resist. That is where the grace comes in.  Pope Francis adds, ““We ask for grace so that we and the entire Church may convert from the crime of gossip to love, to humility, to meekness, to docility, to the generosity of love towards our neighbor.”

Amen to that.

(Written by  Jasmine B. Barrios at the Philippine Online Chronicles)

Photo: “The boring life of a gossip” by Sili[k], c/o Flickr. Some Rights Reserved

Originally posted at the Philippine Online Chronicles/ Blog Watch

online libelAs one of the petitioners in the Philippine Internet Freedom Alliance (PIFA) versus the the Cybercrime Prevention Act  or Republic Act 10175 , I believed that the law only increases the lavish power of Philippine libel laws.  United Nations Human Rights Council is correct in calling Philippine libel law ‘excessive.’

The Supreme Court (SC) does not seem to agree with the United Nations. Today, the SC “ruled on the constitutionality of online libel when it further declares that Sec 4 C4 which penalizes online and cyber-libel is not unconstitutional with the respect to the original author of the post.” It means that those who participate in the libelous statement or message after it is posted violates Constitutional principles. Yes, it is safe for you to share this article to your social media network.

Atty. Harry Roque in a statement , said that “no less than the U.N. Human Rights Committee has already declared that Philippine Criminal Libel Law is contrary to Freedom of Expression. The Court’s decision failing to declare libel as unconstitutional is therefore contrary to Human Rights Law. “

I am so disappointed at the SC decision on online libel . I welcome though, their decision on the unconstitutionality of the provisions such as the Take Down clause and the decision to strike down the real time gathering of information. The fight to protect our internet freedon and hashtags #notocybercrimelaw continue in social media.

Though my lawyer-husband warned me that  “libel has always been a crime, whether committed online or the old-fashioned, printed way”, I am dumbfounded at the higher penalty. In the case of libel, under Article 355 of the Revised Penal Code, the penalty for libel ranges from P200 to P6,000  on top of the six months to six year-long jail time . The penalty would be increased by one degree higher under the Cybercrime Law. If I am charged with libel, I could end up in prison for 12 years. Penalties for online libel is far more severe than the penalties for offline libel.

Rep. Terry Ridon of Kabataan party-list says that “the upholding of the provision for online libel poses imminent threats to many content creators. Libel in itself has been abused for so many years to harass and malign journalists. What’s stopping cunning individuals from exploiting the new online libel provision? I see none”

Inday Varona, former  head of citizen journalism site, said  “ we tried to monitor the patently libelous posts. But the problem with libel as a criminal offense is, it encourages reprisals even when a post is true, fair and motivated by the best intentions. A criminal case is always a cause for concern. You think warlords care about the effort you took to be fair and truthful?” I agree with Inday that the SC decision  “only makes citizen watchdogs vulnerable to people in power with the resources to harass voices of dissent.”

nagtweet sa twitterThe Bloggers and Netizens for Democracy (BAND), composed of petitioners in G.R. 203469, are going back to the Supreme Court soon to file a “motion for partial reconsideration” regarding its decision on the draconian Cybercrime Law. I will join the fight to decriminalize Philippine libel. Goodness gracious, our country is one of the few countries in the world that still considers libel a criminal offense.

In the meantime, how does one protect from being sued for online libel? “Writing well is the best defense”, my husband tells me. In other words, the best defense against anything that would curtail our freedom of expression, be it online or offline, is to express ourselves in words and deeds that are thoughtful, truthful and honest. It will force those who have anything at all worthwhile to say online to write well. My husband assures me that I won’t go to jail as longas I write well. He adds that “there’s nothing like a virtual gun to the head to make one choose his words wisely. And to craft one’s writings carefully and deliberately.” This includes writing opinions based on facts, and using words like “alleged” or adding a question mark to a statement. I have a lawyer to consult so it is easier for me to ask if I am being libelous or not.

I have no desire to spend the rest of my prime time years in jail so I will make sure I slug it out online with finesse.

 

Photo by Noemi Lardizabal-Dado. Some rights reserved.