In a recent conversation with a friend curious about personal preparations before marriage, I emphasized the significance of addressing past wounds and cherishing one’s inner child. I advised her to confront and heal unresolved parental issues, highlighting the importance of nurturing our inner child throughout adulthood.
Irrespective of our age, there resides within us a young child longing for love and acceptance. My personal journey reflects this. Losing my mother just before I turned twenty was a profound challenge. It wasn’t until years later, amidst a health scare in 1996, that I confronted these deep-seated emotions. Facing my own fears during a medical procedure, I connected with my mother’s struggles with breast cancer. In that vulnerable moment, I forgave her and sought forgiveness for any pain I might have caused. This cathartic experience helped me release a heavy emotional burden.
I later realized that unaddressed emotional wounds can inadvertently influence our future relationships. Reflecting on my past, I recognized a pattern where I was drawn to partners mirroring aspects of my mother’s challenging temperament. Despite my mother’s critical and sometimes harsh demeanor during my upbringing, it wasn’t until adulthood that I understood her actions were not a reflection of my worth but a manifestation of her own struggles.
The concept of nurturing one’s inner child became clear to me after recognizing numerous unresolved issues from my childhood. As a child, I often felt that any misstep was a personal failure, leading to a constant pursuit of perfection in the hope of earning my mother’s affection. This belief system persisted until my mother’s passing, after which my relationship with my father, who had been more reserved during her life, blossomed.
In my journey towards independence, I discovered the internal parent-child dynamic as described by Louise Hay. I realized that our internal dialogue often involves a critical parent figure admonishing the child within. Recognizing this, I worked towards fostering a more nurturing internal parent voice.
Healing the inner child involves embracing and accepting every facet of ourselves, including our flaws and past mistakes. Love, I’ve found, is a powerful healing force. It allows us to shed light on our darkest memories and bring understanding and forgiveness. This process of loving and forgiving our inner child can profoundly impact our well-being.
My journey of forgiving my mother was pivotal in releasing past burdens and enhancing my roles as a parent and spouse.
Regardless of gender or perceived strength, we all have a vulnerable child within us, seeking affection and care. If you’re contemplating settling down, it’s crucial to resolve past conflicts and practice self-forgiveness and love.
These days, I consciously indulge my inner child with simple joys like treats, laughter, and playful activities. I often remind myself: “I am perfect, whole, and complete, just as I am.” Repeating this affirmation helps in releasing past traumas and embracing a more wholesome future.
Imagine a place where each brushstroke and color splash is a step towards a brighter future for kids. That’s the essence of the 
Leafing through the yellowed pages of my diary, I found a journal entry written on February 14, 1979. The wonderful thing about keeping a journal is one is able to relive those youthful years and feel giddy all over again. Oh my, were we that cheesy!? Looking back that day, I wrote I saw him through the window carrying a single red rose and a gift. Clutching the red rose, Butch chuckled at the scene unfolding before him. Just like the movies, he muttered. Three pages of sweet nothings where my sappy ex-boyfriend declared his undying love and our dreams in my paper journal. In the last part of my journal entry, he had whispered “Let’s make Valentine’s day the whole year through”. kilig. Today is our 43th Valentine’s Day celebration.
The childlike scribble of the I love you that 
